Mean Missus Mustard profile picture

Mean Missus Mustard

If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don't have the courage to become a homosexual, the

About Me

a) loves her friends (thank you Rob Wheatley of Robboland Music for my own migraine treatment song!)
..
25 shots of botox ...b) makes stuffc) writes stuff
d) look, a banner!

My Interests

speaking out of turn; making Republicans uncomfortable; travel; short film; all things art and design; MC Escher, Hannah Höch, Marc Chagall, Paul Klee, René Magritte, Wassily Kandinsky; animal/human rights; political wrongs; writing; reading; cookin'; collecting/making (hopefully selling) strange jewelry; tree-hugging; vampiric folklore; foreign and/or ancient culture; hats; old stuff; really old stuff; weird stuff; really weird stuff.

I'd like to meet:

Hippies, hedonists, anarchists, antichrists, outcasts, underdogs... Musicians, artists and writers (in other words, hippies, hedonists, anarchists, etc.)... Vampires, eccentric chocolate factory owners, nice folks and banner clickers... But wait : order now and I'll throw in masters of ennui, pastry chefs and ghost hunters! No *'s, please.

Music:

Indie Bands/Musicians: The New Jerseys, not an Airplane, Jeremy Fisher, Sapo Sueño, Kunek, The Northstar Session, Stop Motion Poetry, Darkpark, Get Back Loretta, The Panderers, Funky Nashville, Electric Mystical Soul Vibration, Robboland, Happy Orange Balloon, La Fleur Fatale, Stampead, Truckee Brothers, Limbeck, Flipron, Messer Chups, Death Valley Pizza, Thomas Lunch, Billy's Comet, and the very promising Tyler Baker. Check him out. He's a great kid.

Mainstream: R.E.M., Danny Elfman, Mozart, Brahms, Greig, Schubert, Beethoven, Debussy, Wilco, Radiohead, Nick Drake, Paul Simon, U2, The Posies, Green Day, Sparklehorse, Ray Charles, Tom Waits, Tom Petty, Brandi Carlile, Ken Stringfellow, Guster, The Hollies, Cowboy Junkies, Philip Glass, Rani Shankar, Bob Dylan, Neil Young, The Indigo Girls, Jackson Browne, Roy Orbison, Vince Guaraldi Trio, Henry Mancini, Etta James, Taj Mahal, Benny Goodman, Glen Miller, Gene Krupa, Duke Ellington, Edith Piaf, Frank Sinatra, The Beatles (George Harrison's the favorite here), The Red Hot Chili Peppers, CAKE, The Flaming Lips, The White Stripes, Violent Femmes, Iggy Pop, Calexico, The Sleepy Jackson (thanks, Carl), The Ramones, Johnny Cash, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, The Black Crowes, NIN, Primus, Deftones,Nirvana, Gin Blossoms, Blind Melon, the B-52's, Beck, Los Straightjackets, Weezer, They Might Be Giants, pleasing sounds from strung dumpsters, and of course: Slim Dusty (thanks again, Carl)! and much, much more!

Movies:

the entire Tim Burton collection; Terry Gilliam, Jim Jarmusch, Kevin Smith, Alfred Hitchcock, Blake Edwards and Woody Allen in general; The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, Nosferatu, Dr. Strangelove, Metropolis, M, Frailty, Arsenic and Old Lace, Freaks, The Man Who Cried, The Illusionist, Amelie, As Good As It Gets, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Squid and the Whale, Finding Neverland, A Scanner Darkly, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, All of Me, The Blues Brothers, The Big Lebowski, Wonder Boys (Why's he calling you Vernon?) Animal House.

Television:

Flight of the Conchords, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Real Time With Bill Maher, Extras, The Office, The Soup.

Books:

Authors:Kurt Vonnegut! Hunter S. Thompson, Julio Cortázar, Franz Kafka, James Joyce, J.P. Donleavy, Dr. Seuss, Ron Currie Jr., Ishmael Beah, Joseph Heller, Tim Dorsey, Charles Bukowski, Oscar Wilde, Saul Bellow, Mark Twain, William S. Burroughs, Jack Kerouac, John Kennedy Toole, Ambrose Bierce, George Orwell, Aldous Huxley, Ayn Rand, H.P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allen Poe, Flannery O'Connor, Ray Bradbury, Lewis Carroll, Shel Silverstein, Alan Ginsberg, Philip Larkin, Sylvia Plath, Kahlil Gibran, Sarah Vowel, Jen Lancaster, Laurie Notaro (and her Candy-Apple Freak Show), John Connolly, Dave Barry... I've probably forgotten some. I am a short story fiend.

Heroes:

My grandparents, my teachers, my friends.

My Blog

Vignettes: Weekend Adventures

"Who knows what it's like to be me?" Great flick.  And a good question.  I've asked it myself.  In case any of you should ever intend to know what it is like to be me (God help you), re...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Mon, 03 Mar 2008 11:02:00 PST

Calling All Indie Bands!

The Inept Owl is a satirical online paper covering the latest and greatest (subjectivity is a wonderful thing) in news, politics, and entertainment.  The Owl features articles and edito...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Sat, 15 Dec 2007 06:54:00 PST

What the hell is that...

and where can I get one? It's that time of year again: Carols in the air, red and green everywhere.  That's right; it's just after Halloween. Already behind on the Christmas rush, Plow and Hearth...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Thu, 15 Nov 2007 04:12:00 PST

Sweeet.

It still works... That's what I kept telling myself about my 8+ year old HP with 96MB of RAM (which operated with Windows 98).  There isn't anything wrong with it... We say that a lot in my...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Wed, 31 Oct 2007 03:59:00 PST

10 (Other) Things I Hate About Me

Victor the Dog tagged me.  I'm it!  Some of you will be familiar with this, but it's fun, so I'm giving it another go.  Certain things beg repeating, but I've added some new factoids th...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Sun, 19 Aug 2007 09:08:00 PST

Hold On To Your Pocket Protectors!

Fix your glasses with tape - the Cranford Public Library is having a book sale! I took a puff of Albuterol and roamed the shelves.  Tucked into the poetry section, for lack of a better place, was...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Thu, 16 Aug 2007 02:00:00 PST

Say It With Mugshots!

Writer's note: My thanks and apologies to Johnny, who both ispires me and puts up with my absurdity. What's important to most Americans?  The environment?  The budget?  Foreign policy?&...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Tue, 19 Jun 2007 02:43:00 PST

Soapbox Opera

I have a lot of hobbies and interests to keep me busy; but in my spare time things annoy me.  In the spirit of narcissism, I've decided to list them. Top Five Things Currently Pissing Me Off 5.&n...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Thu, 31 May 2007 05:41:00 PST

LATKES!

Hello, friends.  Are you seated comfortably?  Good; then I'll begin: If you know what the title of this blog means, then your home town had an excellent school system (and if you get that jo...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Fri, 25 May 2007 06:28:00 PST

OR: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Air Horn

Your reporter is busy procrastinating (man, I can't wait to get this room cleaned).  With nothing better else to do, I thought I'd share a memory. A long, long time ago, when I was a manager for ...
Posted by Mean Missus Mustard on Sat, 19 May 2007 03:06:00 PST