I like ranting on anti-social social web sites.
mmmmmm ... meat ...
So ... wait, does anyone still read this part of the profile? Do people care what kind of music everyone else is listening to? I mean, are there losers sitting alone in their underwear, at 2 a.m., wired on soy mochachiatocrappafrappachinos, with soft porn on in the background and the warm glow of the monitor on their face thinking, "wow, look at this other loser! It's like we were made for each other! They like 'pretty much anything except, maybe, country western!' That describes me perfectly!! I'm gonna email them right now and tell them that I'm taking the red eye to Dog Leg, Arkansas so we can meet as soon as possible and talk about how awesome the new Good Charlene video is and how it's changed our lives. Then maybe we'll fall fast in love, get married and have kids with awesome musical taste ... or just hook up and cheat on our spouses ... whatever." I mean, I understand using this thing as a fancy phone book, but the last time I checked, my current phone book doesn't list people's favorite bands: "John - 555-1212; Easy listening/Ambient". Or, am I missing the point. Have we all de-evolved to the point where this is the new meat market?? Is this the new "cruising the mall for chicks"?? Am I the dipshit sitting at the bar all alone, wearing $5 cologne wondering where the babes are while everyone else is having crazy, sloppy My Space orgies while blasting Simple Plan??? Oh ... wait ... I gotta go. Bedroom Eyes 2, starring Wings Hauser just got good! Time to log off from the scary fire box. Oh ... I almost forgot ... I like pretty much anything ... except, maybe, country/western…
You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me. Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon--with nail polish.
My third parent ... I love you TV ...
oooh ... this where I get to be ostentatious ... Women (and anything else by Bukowski), the Tin Drum, Beyond Good and Evil, Death on the Installment Plan, Crime and Punishment, Geek Love
Lord Jesus Christ, my Mom, Dad and TV, Easy E and the slug I'm gonna lodge in my brain after writing this.