The Closed - ProfilesArchive

About Me

The Closed was actually found already in the mid 70Â´s in North Dakota. At the time lead guitar player Granny Johnson spent 6 years in Jail being convicted of double humicide. There he suddenly met the drummer Driver Nielsen who was arrested for high speed driving in Norway. Later on he was found not guilty, but thatÂ´s a whole another story.
Years passed by until in the early 80Â´s, because of a good behaviour these two young guys from Ohio were allowed to buy some musical instruments from the local music store. Only problem was that rockinstruments like guitars and drums were not allowed. Every sunday while others spend their morning in church, Granny and Driver used to show their musical ideas to each other in their own band room. Jamming with their flutes and tubas they composed almost ten songs.
So few years passed by and dudes got out of jail. Being sober for nearly 10 years was too much for Driver. In rehab our drummer met bass player Concrete Commando and singer Carl-Sofia Beltzer who both had been in rehab almost their whole lifes. Next thing what had to be done was to escape from there. It was just before christmas eve when these three brave young guys managed to steal fake costumes of a doctor and the road was clear.
Now they had a band, but still something was missing. They needed badly also a percussionist. Not because Granny was high all the time, but somebodyÂ´s had to pay for their dopes. It was 1998. At the time Max Chill worked as a private dentist for William Chatner. Max was also well known for his interest for collecting bones. Also Commando had same kind of interests, but in a different way. While the booze and all kind of herbs paid CommandoÂ´s wife and all the money, he had no chance but to donate two of his precious ribs. So in this twisted way these two guys met each other. The Closed was born...
In the year 2003 big record company Popkori signed the band and you know the rest. Over 1 000 000 copies sold. Also one of the most biggest tour ever made called "The Biggest Fang" was also a huge success. Only one bad thing happend during the years 2003-2005. The lead singer Beltzer was arrested during the show in Jemen because he had said the word "duck" three times in a row. But now in year 2008 the band is stronger than ever before. Listen and enjoy these new songs. YouÂ´ll love 'em.
John E. Williams - Rolling Store magazine, April 2008

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 2/28/2007
Band Website: theclosed.net
Band Members: Carl-Sofia Belzer
Granny Johnson
Max "heminem" Chill
Driver Nielsen
Concrete Commando

Check out:
TheCLOSED.net
TheCLOSED 4um
TheCLOSED demo
Influences: Roxette. Just Roxette.
Sounds Like: Kirka high on stereoids
Type of Label: None

My Blog

WOW, A Website - go and spread the seeds!

So the story goes on - we have just opened our little boutique and are ready to take the www2.0 under control! Please visit and leave your comments to our blahbahblah section.The Internet address: htt...
Posted by The Closed on Thu, 20 Mar 2008 01:52:00 PST

All you get when you ruin it yourself

The Closed's first demo "All you get when you ruin it yourself " (with nice artwork) is now ready / available. Take a listen, have fun. Dogzzzzzzz! BULLSHIT! Go to Battaya, fight for your p...
Posted by The Closed on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 03:10:00 PST

About mixing

Bob Saget! Damn! Mixing / mastering "process" for the 12 song "demo" is ongoing. Almost done now. Yes we're fine thanks; apes are doing well. Money and blowjob's grow on trees and stuff like that. Som...
Posted by The Closed on Fri, 18 Jan 2008 01:50:00 PST

Sleeping with Fishes

This is the last sukker from Dan family. Commando wrote this piece together in a submarineWHEELS with Clouseau while heading towards the upworld as the fishes know it.He gave a great time while discus...
Posted by The Closed on Fri, 28 Dec 2007 06:43:00 PST

The End? What’s next?

Whoooaaahh - and some xmas!While Max Chill was selling our backline for crack, rest of our unholy toy-boy-choir-noir enjoyed each others company with booze & vocal recordings. It was that time of year...
Posted by The Closed on Sun, 16 Dec 2007 03:44:00 PST

New songs...

CYLONSThis song was made during infernal galactic war in a spaceship. At the moment when Cylons started to destroy our mothership, the first notes were produced by the mighty Granny himself! No earthl...
Posted by The Closed on Thu, 06 Dec 2007 01:49:00 PST

Sparks are flying!

Oh, SHIT! FUCK! BOB SEGET! MEN'S ASSES!There is new song to listen...this is the second breed of it's kind. Yeah, the first bastard was way too much, i mean WAY TOO MUCH! It had 200 tracks of boy choi...
Posted by The Closed on Fri, 12 Oct 2007 12:48:00 PST

Guinea pig with french fries?

How about that? It's actually called "Cuy" in Peru and is a big favourite among locals. Don't talk shit about total!
Posted by The Closed on Wed, 03 Oct 2007 03:57:00 PST

New song to change the world, part 1

So finally something new to listen beside the old stuff. This piece is something new (again) from the vaults of deep love. This song is not the typical kind of piece. It really wrote itself and it had...
Posted by The Closed on Sat, 28 Jul 2007 01:24:00 PST

Parallel Universe - instant hit from trans-am-sylvania?

Humanoids come and go, so does twirls in the attic. That was the case this time when Max Chill found his long gone chiliyard-microcosmos from his foreskin. Something can't just describe with words and...
Posted by The Closed on Fri, 01 Jun 2007 03:37:00 PST