About Me
I'm The Original Cupcake Whore®
Welcome to my official myspace page
Yes Darlings, it's really me and I really am that fabulous
I love am obsessed with cupcakes and I'm also a Frostitute
I'll eat cupcakes, vomit, and eat some more. And I don't even purge! I just enjoy eating until I pop or puke. I'm quite proud of my food addiction and cupcakes and cake are the only foods I would be willing to whore myself for
I've eaten so many pink cupcakes that I have no need for blush
I survive on cupcakes, cake, toast, fairy bread, fairy toast, pizza, chicken wings, bento box lunches, sushi, Pocky, lattes and Tab Cola
I believe in eating dessert first and painting the town pink
My religion? - Cupcakes
My religion is very simple - simply bring me cupcakes and I'll allow you to worship me
Things I won't do for cupcakes:
Sleep with you - unless a whole bakery or a lifetime supply is involved
Shoot up - but I might snort a line of frosting
Anything farm related
Eat road kill
Role play - although I do have thoughts about playing subway vigilante and crack whore
Eat Little Debbie
Babysit
O.K., I lied. I would do just about anything for cupcakes
Eat Your Heart Out Marie Antoinette
I'm a pleasantly pesky girl. Born a Princess. I'm also a former stick figure spokesmodel from the 70's and early 80's. I was pushed into modeling by my Aunt and I got out as fast as I could, my heart just wasn't in it. I have one, and only one modeling photo, out of hundreds, in my dusty portfolio that I can actually stomach looking at and I drew eyeliner on it to make my eyes look better
Just who am I NOW? I'm a creature of mystery. You probably won't see me unless I want to be seen
I'm also weird and dys"fun"ctional and it's fabulous! You gotta get a little weird if you're gonna make a difference. Let this socialite show you how
Im a self-proclaimed food critic, food addict and city girl extraordinaire
~Am I real or fiction?~ People ask if I'm "real". Well, I'm not quite plastic... :)
Embrace my motto: We're all weird - Some of us just show it more than others
Random Tidbits
I have 14 13 12 pets :( - seven six of which are guinea pigs. I call my guinea pigs Superstars!!!
I have a weakness for cupcakes, chicken wings and *baby guinea pigs
*Note: I do not eat baby guinea pigs
When I sign a guest book I write, "I killed seven people."
I once stole a cupcake from a funeral home kitchen and on a dare put the wrapper in the jacket pocket of a corpse. Yes I did.
I steal pens from funeral homes and keep them in a tiny urn
When I was a kid I would bargain with my siblings for their dessert. If they refused, I made their life hell. "I have no idea where your FAVORITE G.I. Joe is???"
I watch the movies, Rear Window, Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer, all summer long.
I love making fairy bread and fairy toast and eating it too!
Alice In Wonderland and Cinderella are my favorite Disney characters. I like Tink and Mickey too
I secretly enjoy watching The Disney Channel
I think the wolf in Little Red Riding Hood is very misunderstood
I have a fetish for Roswell diners
I've always wanted to rob a bank just for the thrill of it. Since I don't think I could get away with it I load up on bank suckers instead.
When I pass by a truck full of cows or pigs on their way to the slaughter house, I vow I'm becoming a vegan. The next day I eat steak and eggs for breakfast.
If I kill myself, it will be in a unique way. Like, Karo syrup and Dexatrim or BBQ some kebabs on the grill in my bathroom with the door closed.
Contrary to popular belief/rumors/tabloids, I was NOT forced into prostitution by a Mexican drug cartel. I volunteered. :)
I tried to drown a turtle (actually it was two) when I was in the first grade. They were our classroom pets. I held them under water with a pencil until they squirmed. Please don't message me about animal cruelty. It's not like I beat your dog.
I also filled a Leggs egg with rolly polly bugs and bees (separate occasions) and shook the hell out of the egg, listened for them to freak out and then ran the egg under scalding hot water until they were dead. Felt bad, repeated. I would have confessed this to a priest, but I'm not Catholic. You'll do.
I stole a shit load of silver dollars from my friend Lisa when I was 11. I also told her Mother my name was Penny (Lost In Space). My Mother made me return the coins that Lisa "gave me".
I eat vienna sausage like tic tacs
I like to smoke candy cigarettes
I love Tab Cola. Probably too much. I've been drinking it since I was a child
Tab Cola and lattes are my signature drinks
I'm a royal whore when I can't find the remote
I love horse enchiladas :)
I want to be bionic
For years I told my Mother that I loved her iced tea, when in fact it sucked
When I was a teenager I would write the word "whore" above photos of models in magazines at the school library, just to shock people. Only I spelled it "hoar".
I live for Shark Week (Discovery Channel) every year
I like to watch Lifetime Television
I like to watch Dawson's Creek repeats in the middle of the night. And MTV'S Next.
I walk in dangerous places on purpose
I still love Raggedy Ann, Eloise and Madeline
I hoard lip gloss
I hold my breath until I get my way
I love cupcakes and tutus more than anything
I love candy necklaces
I like eating candy necklaces and listening to Disney tunes
I embarrass my royal family
If I was stranded on an island and could only have two things other than food, I would choose a monkey and a Frisbee or Spam and the Bible. Spam is not food.
I love listening to Puccini's Madame Butterfly (my favorite opera) while eating spaghetti and salad
I was forbidden to read Cosmopolitan Magazine when I was a teenager. Lol! Rebels rule!
I see a new movie every Tuesday evening by myself
I love American, French, Japanese, Mexican and British culture
I speak Old School fluently
I like anchovies on my pizza
I was not prom queen
I find adventure wherever I go
I just realized what a little klepto I was when I was a kid.
Check me out at Buzznet.com
Visit Le Cupcake and tell Kylie I sent you
Life is sweeter in a tutu
No, you can't borrow it :)
Tiffany Diamond Cupcakes
Diamonds Cupcakes Are A Girl's Best Friend
Addict
Portrait by Pilar Alvarez of Myspace
I'd like to meet other fabulous people and people who don't publicly urinate. I'd like to correspond with other Cupcake Whores and fabulous city girls. Cupcake Whore's Unite!!! I'd also like to meet bakers, bakery owners, Cosmo Girls, The Powerpuff Girls, dreamers, those full of laughter and magical souls
If you are one of my friends you are in The Whore Corps
Sugar Daddies of all ages are encouraged to enlist
It's nice to be important,
but it's more important to be nice
I will add you to my friend space eventually. So please be patient, I'm a busy girl. If I do add you to my friends and you turn out to be psychotic, please clean up your breadcrumb trail leading to me. Gracias.
Are YOU in MY Burn Book?
If you are, you're not in my friend space.
*Disclaimer: Some photos have been sent to me by fans and the copyrights are unknown
*No Cupcakes were harmed in the creation of this myspace page
*Please note that Lex Vegas is not accepting any friend requests. Her page is private and for friends only
