A "Novel"BACK AGAINST THE WALL profile picture

A "Novel"BACK AGAINST THE WALL

Back Against The Wall a Novel Coming April 2007

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Thanks for stopping by to check out my page..I'm the Author (NaTasha) of Back Against The Wall coming this year. If you like to read or even if you don't you will love this novel. Take the time to explore my page...Support your girl and add me to ya friends To get to know me personally...Scroll down to my Friends List and Click on NaTasha request to add me and get to know the Author Personally!...Be Blessed...Lively dialogue and the action zipping along... lyrical sexuality! Ya gotta check it out!

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Real Street, Raw, breathtaking love story of a true thug trying to rebuild start a new life after spending five years in prison for a crime his brother committed. Grant meets Crystal. She's running from her pass. An X-con and stripper meet and fall in love both trying rebuild their life, but it catches up with them and their Backs Are Against The Wall. But will they overcome it all to be together? If you love drama, street, sexy, love, lies, lust and raw in your face dirt. You want to read Back Against the Wall...Read an Excerpt of Back Against The Wall Now Below!!Layout Provided by CodeMyLayout.com - Myspace Layouts

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Myspace LayoutsRead a Excerpt Now!!Grant My mouth dropped open when this fine ass sister walked to the center of the stage grasping the pole. The old school song Brown Sugar by D’Angleo came on. “Get high of her love don’t know how to behave. I want some of your Brown Sugar. Skin caramel and coca eyes.” Those lyrics fit exactly how I was feeling for sure. She walked seductively across the stage. She captivated me with her piercing eyes. I swear she was looking dead at me. She let out a slight grin when she saw the look on my face. I was mesmerized by her presence and my dick stood at attention for her. I sat up to the edge of my seat so I could get a closer look of Brown Sugar. She wore a sheer see threw robe with just a g-string underneath. She hopped up on the pole swinging around vibrating her ass in slow motion. “Damn!” Gee said out loud taking notice as he crept toward the edge of his seat. Her body was flawless and her dark brown perky breast looked like they were calling my name. She looked like she was unreal, to perfect to be true. When she dropped her sheer robe, I ran my eyes up and down her body, her small waist and hips caught my attention. She crawled to the edge of the stage in my direction teasing me licking her lips. I swear she was dancing just for me. She stood back up slowly dropping her ass all the way down to the floor twisting her hip and backing her ass up in my direction. She was thick in all the right places. She gyrated her ass grinding up against the pole. “Shit. You better go up their bra and break her off some dollar bills.” Gee laughed noticing she was into me too. I stood up adjusted my jeans. Thank god they were baggy, because I was hard as a rock. I approached the stage digging in my pocket for some cash. Brown Sugar spread her legs dropping to the floor into the splits. All the men in the club began to cheer and whistle throwing money up on the stage. I approached the stage standing still watching her lick her lips seductively. I was in a completely daze. It was like the room was silent and we were the only ones in the club together. Her eyes stared dead into mind I wanted to pull her off the stage and fuck her right there. Brown Sugar rolled over sticking her perfect thick ass out I couldn’t move I was infatuated with her beauty. She was fine ass hell and the softest skin tone I ever saw. Her long pretty black bone straight hair hung over her left eye. It was probably a weave but I didn’t care, baby girl had it going on. She crawled on her knees toward me calling me with her finger to come closer to the stage. Finally I felt my legs and moved closer to the stage tossing all the money I had in my pockets (about twenty bucks) on the stage. “Alright give it up for Brown Sugar.” The DJ announced as the crowd cheered louder she made her way around picking up all her money. I went back to my seat not taking my eye off her. I watch her disappear behind the stage taking one more glance at me. “You see the way she was looking at me?” “Nigga. That’s her muther fucken job.” Gee laughed. “Naw…she was checking me out.” “Alright.” Gee laughs grew louder. “She was fine ass hell though, damn she giving Beyonce a run for her money, did you see her ass?” “Hell yeah!” I gulped down my beer that sat there waiting trying to get my dick to go down that was trying to bust through my jeans. “I hope she brings her ass out here. I have to get a lap dance from her.” “Shit me too!” Gee eyes scanned the club. “Where the hell is Stacy ass?” “I’m right here.” Stacy said appearing out of nowhere. “What’s up ya’ll.” Her high pitch whinny voice said as she sat in the empty chair at the table. She sat her pin and pad down as if she was taking a break from bartending. “What’s up Grant? I heard a lot about you.” She spoke to me before Gee could introduce us. She smiled at me wide showing all her teeth. Then I remembered seeing her face before in the prom pictures Gee sent me when I was locked up. Stacy was cute high yellow black girl with long braids. She was kinda on the skinny side though. She didn’t appear to be Gee’s type he was always into thick females that had body and usually dark skinned. She was complete opposite of what he preferred. “How you doing?” I said trying to take my mind off of Brown Sugar. “A who…was the dancer...Brown Sugar…that was just on stage…I think my brother in love with her?” “Shit there goes the boss.” Stacy said hoping up quickly when a tall white man came from behind the bar toward her direction. He looked some slick Italian with a nice beige suit on. “Oh um…Brown Sugar I don’t really know much about her. She quite and keeps to herself. She’ll be out here in a minute giving lap dances. I got to get back to work. I’ll be back.” “Wait up. Did you take care of what I asked you?” Gee asked Stacy before she left the table. “Yeah. Take your brother back to VIP around ten. Ask for Lovely. I gotta go.” Stacy rushed off back to the bar. “What the fuck is that all about?” I questioned Gee looking all around the club, trying to find Brown Sugar. “I got a piece off ass lined up for you.” “With some white bitch?” “Does it matter, pussy is pussy.” “I can’t be fucken no bitch up in here man, you got me messed up!” “Fool your ass ain’t had no pussy in five years, you best take what you can get.” “Fuck you nigga.” I laughed finishing my third beer. I glanced at my watch it was fifteen minutes until ten. I guess Gee was right. I needed some pussy bad. I really didn’t care what the hoe looked like. But if I had my choice I’d take Brown Sugar fine ass, to VIP and fuck the shit out of her. Shit I’d probably nut just touching her ass. “A there goes Brown Sugar.” Gee said tapping me on the arm pointing across the room. I sat back watching her smile and laugh with a few guys at the bar. She was fully dressed in a sweat suit. “Look like she’s leaving.” “Damn.” I jumped up quickly without even thinking twice. “Where you going?” I ignored Gee making my way to the bar before she left out the door. A big fat red neck security guard stood by her side, as if he was her personal bodyguard. “I’m out of here ya’ll see ya’ll tomorrow.” I heard her say. I had to say something to her. I calmly approach her when the security guard stepped in front of me. “She’s off.” He said putting his hand on my shoulder. “Get your fucken hands off me!” I shoved his hand back. “Don’t make me put your ass out of here!” Brown Sugar looked back when she heard all the commotion. “Chuck…it’s okay.” She stepped in front of him. “Hi.” She spoke in a sweet innocent voice eyeing me up and down as if she liked what she saw. “What’s up…I um…you leaving?” I stuttered on my words feeling stupid when I realized I didn’t even know what to say to her. “Yeah. I’m off.” She giggled. She was even more beautiful up close. Her presence was intoxicating. “What’s your name?” “Ah…my bad. I’m Grant.” I stuck my hand out to shake hers. “Grant what a strong name.” She placed her small soft hand in mind. “I liked your show up there on stage.” “Well thank you. I’m the new girl on the block here so I’m surprised they even let me get up there and do my thing. I was so nervous but looking at you made me relax.” “Well I’m glad I could help.” “Yeah me too.” She laughed tucking her hair behind her ears. “Well I gotta get going Chuck has to walk me out. It was nice to meet you Grant. I hope you’ll come see me again.” “I don’t really do the strip club thing often…so I don’t know...my brother’s just down here from school this weekend and were just hanging out.” “Grant…please tell me you’ll come see me again.” She begged poking her lips out grasping her backpack. “I’ll be dancing again Sunday night. I’ll be looking for you.” She winked at me blowing a kiss. “Bye.” She said gesturing for Chuck to walk her out. I stood there feeling like a fool. What the hell was I thinking she was a stripper that was her job, to get my ass to come back and spend more money. Here I am thinking she was feeling me like she was going to give me her phone number or something. Chuck laughed looking back at me. I gave him the finger making my way back to the table. “You get her number?” “Hell naw!” I said upset feeling like a punk. “Fuck her she looks like one of those high maintenance hoes anyway. Here.” Gee shoved three hundred dollars in my hand and a condom. “Go on back yo VIP…and go get you some.” “I don’t know about this. You sure it’s cool?” “Yes…just go on.” He assured me. I made my way back to the VIP. The security guard patted me down then took the three hundred dollars from me and led me back behind a door down a long hallway. He opened a door gesturing me to enter the small dark room the he shut the door. I sat down on a small futon couch against the wall trying to adjust my eyes to the flashing lights. “Hey big guy. How are you?” This skinny blond hair blue eyes white girl stood bikini top and thong in front of me. She looked like a low class Jessica Simpson. My eyes scanned her frame. She had a nice little shape for a white girl. She had on the highest heel hooker shoes I ever seen. I couldn’t help but wondered how she walked in those all night. “I’m a’ight.” “Oh you’ll be much better after I’m done with you.” She giggled losing her top exposing her small acorn size breast and pink nipples. My dick stood right up at attention when she dropped to her knees. “A little birdie told me you needed full treatment tonight.” She whispered un buckling my belt. She yanked my dick out quickly shoving it into her mouth. I grasped her head pressing her mouth deeper into me without a second thought. Shit she had a deep ass throat. It only took me a good two minutes and I came. She swallowed quickly like it was frosting looking up at me. “You have a big cock. You need a minute…to get it back up then I’ll ride the hell out of you.” I stood up tucking my dick back in my pants feeling embarrassed that I came so quick. “Naw…I’m good.” “You have me for a thirty minutes sweetheart.” She said pulling off her thong grabbing my hands pushing my finger into her pussy. Then I smelt a funky fish smell that made me feel sick to my stomach. I snatched my hand back quickly. “What’s wrong?” “What the fuck is that smell?” I took a whiff of my finger and just about died. “Ah hell naw!” She smacked her lips in disappointment backing away from me. I rushed to the door letting my self out. The security guard led me out. “Where’s the bathroom man?” “Right out to your left.” He told me letting me back out into the club. I rushed to the men rooms. Scrubbing the nasty fish smell off my hands with hot water damn near burning the skin off my hand. I was gone kick Gee’s ass for hooking me up with a nasty fish smelling white bitch. And her name was Lovely wasn’t nothing Lovely about her at all.

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NATASHA "GET TO KNOW ME" I'm the Author!a

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A Sample of a book I'm working on now HARD KNOCK LIFE!! Check it out!! 100% Copyright!Hard Knock LifeChapter 1 I’ll never forget the day I saw my mother’s boyfriend pouncing up and down on my sister Ronda. It was the day that changed my life forever as well as my sister’s. My only sister, I often think about and wonder what life would have been like with her around now that I am a grown woman in need of advice. It was a hot summer day. I mean hella hot so hot you wanted to stick your head in the icebox and chill. All the girls on our blocked hated on me because while they were busy playing hopscotch in the street sweating their kitchen press and curls out and my hair never did that. I think my own sister even hated me for having a good grain of hair. You see we had different fathers and my father was Cuban so I took after him with cold black curly wavy hair, which grew down my back and my mother always kept in one long braid. Even though I was the same completion ass most of the other black girls and even darker than some they still hated me for it my long sleek hair. Sometimes I wish I could have kinky hair and wear corn rolls and press in curly like the other girls so they would like me. I never understood what the big deal was all over hair. On this particular day I was minding my own business waiting for my sister to hurry up and come back outside to help me with our lemonade stand we set up out front of our house. Rhonda was my big sister my only sister she was fourteen and I had to practically beg her to help me set up my stand. She wanted to go down to her best friends Claire’s house and hang out, but instead she stayed to help me with my lemonade stand. Ronda was my very best friend. I wanted to be just like her. She was beautiful. We were both about the same caramel complexion like our mother and shared the same features of high cheek bones almond shape eyes thick eye lashes and a average size nose. But in some ways we looked different because we had different fathers, so our hair texture was different and because of our age Ronda was very well developed already even had bigger breast than my mom at only fourteen and hips for days. Everywhere we went older men hit on her and would think she was older. It was like over night she grew into this fully developed women. I was only nine and hoping one day I would develop such womanly curves, I was had long skinny legs and arms. I looked like a tooth pick even though I ate like a pig. Boys would always tease me and say I was bony. They never looked twice at me; I didn’t really care because I hated boys at this time anyway. “What you got!” Jessica a big bully Mexican girl who lived up the street asked me as she approached my lemonade stand which consisted of a plastic table two pitchers of lemonade and paper cup and my Princess jewelry box to hold money in. I had to beg momma to let up use her plastics table off the patio and kool laid pitchers. “I’m selling lemonade.” “How much?” The heavy set black girl asked that was with her. I never had seen her before on the block. “Twenty-five cents.” “Twenty –five cents. You crazy!” They both laughed giving each other a high five. “Say you give us both a up of lemonade as taste testers and if we like it then we will buy a cup.” Something told me not to trust them. I knew Jessica didn’t like me, but she knew my big sister Ronda would kick her ass if she messed with me so I decided to go ahead. I poured two cups on lemonade half full handing it to them waiting to see what they thought. I knew it was good. I use a lot of sugar and I must have squeezed over fifty lemonades I collected from our neighbors yard for free. “That’s nasty!” The black girl said. “No it’s not.” “Yes it is.” She responded slamming the empty cup on the table. Jessica sucked down the last of hers looking down at me. “Give me some more!” “Pay me a quarter.” I demanded. Jessica reached in her pocket to hand me a quarter but the black girl stopped her. “Don’t give her any money. Forget her!” They both laughed. Then before I knew it the black girl reached over and helped herself to the pitcher and poured her another cup to the rim. “You gotta pay me for that!” I cried. “Or what. Huh skinny bones. What you gone do?” She laughed. I grew with anger I could feel my inside burning. They would have not done this to me if Ronda were here. “I’mma tell my sister!” I screamed. “Tell her.” They laughed both laughed and then Jessica reached and grabbed my Princess jewelry box and they both ran off. “Give it back!” I yelled I tired to chase after them, but I couldn’t keep up with them and what was I going to do anyway, one of them could easily stomp me to the ground. By the time I made it back to my lemonade stand a few other street kids had drank all my lemonade and stole my left over cups. I cried rushing into my house so upset. My mom was at work; I was going to tell Ronda. I knew she was going to get them all. I rushed in the house looking around the living room. Aaron my mom’s boyfriend was not I sitting in his favorite spot tuned into the TV watching football and sucking down a whole twelve pack of beer. I swear he was glued to the T.V whenever football was on. Aaron always watched us on Sundays. My mom was a nurse’s aide and always worked on Sundays. Aaron was a construction worker and always had the weekends off. I didn’t like him too much. He hit my mom when he was drunk, but my mom tolerated him because he helped her pay the bills. She could never make ends meet without him. She made that clear to us several times before. Mom went through so many boyfriends. I never could understand why a woman so beautiful couldn’t keep a man. Ronda I cried running down the hallway I glanced in the kitchen. No Ronda, I checked in the bathroom. No Ronda. I knew she never allowed me to go in her room, but I was so upset I didn’t think twice and knock first like she always demanded and when I opened the door I saw something no nine-year-old girl should ever see. Aaron holding his hands over Ronda’s mouth with her bent over the bed and his pants down around his ankles thrusting her like a wild man. I saw his black butt it was so disgusting. He turned looking back at me, but not stopping his action. “Get out of here now Raquel.” But I just stood there in a traumatized. I could not believe what he was doing to my sister. “Shut the door now!” He yelled again. But again I did not move. Until I heard my sister cry. “Close the door and go wait for me.” Ronda low voice demanded. I closed the door quickly running out the house crying. I knew what he was doing to her was not right. I sat on the porch crying my eyes out trying to figure out what the hell was going on. I knew what sex was. I knew only adults had sex, not kids. Ronda was only a kid like me older but she wasn’t an adult. And momma was going to be very mad if she knew what was going on. I was so confused. Then I heard the screen door open and shut behind me and Ronda took a set next to me on the porch. Her eyes where blood shoot read and her hair were all over her head. She was trembling. “Come here.” She snatched me by the arms and pulled me around to the side of the house. “Don’t say nothing to Momma about what you saw!” She yelled pointing her finger in my face. “You hear me. I’ll give you my lip gloss just don’t tell Momma.” “Why you let him do that nasty stuff to you?” I cried. “I don’t let him do nothing to me. He…he just does.” “Why?” “Because…I don’t know why, but I do know if Momma finds out, she will leave him and we will have to go live back in that apartment again. I know you don’t want to go back their do you?” “I’ll go back there I don’t care, he should not do that to you. Are you okay, did her hurt you, does he do this all the time?” “Shut up, just shut up alright!” She cried sipping up her jeans. “Just promise me you won’t tell Momma. Promise. She reached in her pocket and gave handed me her lip-gloss. I always wanted my own lip-gloss. “Okay.” I held my head down and stuck the lipstick in my pocket. “Now come on let’s go sell some lemonade.” She put her arm on my shoulder. “They stole it, we can’t it’s gone.” “Who stole it, Jessica and some other black girl?" I cried. “Oh hell no.” She grabbed my hand dragging me down the street upset. When I looked back at the house. I saw Aaron’s standing on the porch smoking a cigarette grinning at us. He winked his eye at me. Did that mean I was next? I wish I could rewind that day. That was the day that changed everything in my life. Ronda never told me how long Aaron did nasty things to her, but I knew every Sunday when Momma was gone for about a year Ronda would make me go outside and play and stay up in the house with Aaron for hours. I never told. I wish I had told now. Aaron never attempted anything with me. He played cool, like nothing happen when my Momma got home. But one day. Momma came home early on a Sunday. “Why you sitting here looking all sad?” I heard my momma voice ask. She walked up with two paper brown grocery bags in her arms staring into my eyes with her pretty hazel green eyes. Even in her nursing uniform my mom look like a breath of fresh air. I admired her. She had golden brown skin like honey and stood tall and slim. Her legs seemed never ending in her nursing skirt and platform nursing shoes. She always kept her hair slicked back in a tight bun when she was working. I shared her high cheekbones and almond shapes eyes. “Hey momma.” I stood up quickly. “You home early.” “Yes, baby. I wanted to surprised ya’ll. You know today’s Aaron’s birthday. I’mma make a cake you want to help me?” I didn’t respond I just stood there trying to figure out, what I could stall Momma so she would not go in the house. But then I wanted her to go in the house. I wanted her to see what was going on. I wanted her to kick Aaron out the house for hurting my sister. “Where’s you sister?” Momma asked me making her way into the house. I followed in behind her. “I don’t know.” I lie. She dropped the grocery on the table, kicking off her shoes. She looked around and then headed down the hallway. I heard it, I know she heard the moans and grown coming out of Rhonda room. She pushed the door open and I stood behind Momma and caught Aaron on top of my sister with her legs wrapped around his shoulders doing the nasty. My mom screamed and charged at them. “Get off her, what the hella are you doing! She charged at them like a raging bull. I cried. Ronda screamed. Jumping up grabbing her clothes off the floor. Aaron grabbed my mom trying to stop her from hitting him, and then he slapped and threw her across the room she slammed into the wall headfirst. I ran over to her. “Momma!” Ronda yelled. Momma eyes rolled back in her head and blood dripped from her lip. “Now clam the fuck down.” Aaron yelled zipping up his pants. “Get the fuck out of my house!” My mom cried. “Your house. I pay all the mutherfucken bills up in here.” He laughed. We all sat still line our places afraid to move. “I’ll tell you what you get the fuck out and take your little bitches with you. Ronda little fast ass wanted it. Running around here wearing all them tight clothes. You better not run to the police and tell them shit either or I swear I’ll kill all of you bitches.” And that was it. He left out the room and slammed door. My mom slowly stood up looking over at Ronda and before she could say anything she grabbed her and slapped her dead in the face. “You little whore. How long has this been going on?" I stood there in disbelief. “Momma I swear I told him to stop. I swear momma he made me do it. I didn’t want to do it. He said if I didn’t he would kill me momma!” Ronda cried. Mom immediately looked back at me. I “Did he touch you too?” I shook my head no afraid to say anything. “Thank you Jesus. Girls grab your clothes and whatever you can fit in your suitcases. We are getting the fuck out of here. This stays between us all right, don’t even tell your grandma about this. Nobody. Ya’ll hear me.” She yelled wiping the blood from her lip. “Yes, yes Momma.” We both replied. To this day I never understood why momma never told the police about Aaron. We left that night back to a shelter. Neither Ronda nor my momma ever spoke a word about what happen. We stayed at the shelter for almost a month. Then finally mom found a small too bedroom apartment. I knew mom didn’t make much money, and didn’t receive any child support from neither of our fathers. My father died when I was only three years old and my sisters fathers just disappeared I guess. I wasn’t sure whatever happens to him. Life went back to normal pretty much once we settled into our own place though Momma and Ronda were never the same with each other again. Mom would always yell at her make her cook, clean and do everything in the house. I over heard mom tell Ronda one day that she would never bring another man home because she’d probably screw him. I knew it hurt Ronda a lot. I’d hear her cry herself to sleep almost every night for three years. “Sit still now.” Ronda yelled at me. She was busy trying to comb my hair. “You have too much damn hair.” She griped. “Ouch!” I cried trying to withstand her heavy hand. “Shut up! I’mma just cut it off.” “No.” I cried. “It will grown back your hair grows fast. If you can’t comb it your self then I’mma cut it. I’m not your Momma I shouldn’t have to comb your hair every damn morning. I was twelve now and I loved my hair I tired to comb it but I couldn’t manage all my hair it would always end up all over my head. “I’mma get the scissors.” Rhonda rushed to the kitchen. “You not cutting my hair!” I cried rushing to the bathroom grabbing my hair trying to put it in a bun. “Look at you think you’re so pretty because you got all that pretty hair.” Ronda teased standing behind me with the scissors snapping them. Before I knew it she grabbed the back of my head and cut damn near my whole bun off. I screamed she laughed. Ronda whole attitude had changed, she wasn’t the loving big sister I use to have ever what happen. “I’m telling Momma!” I cried looking at my ear length hair now. “I don’t care tell her.” Ronda said leaving out the bathroom. I ran to my room falling on my bed crying. I hated Ronda. She always tortured me now that she was older. Ronda now sixteen was not the big sister I use to know. She never let me hang out with her anymore and always kicked me out the room when momma wasn’t home. Which seem to be all the time. Now that momma had to take on another job to make ends meet she was never home. And when she was home she was sleeping or fussing at us to clean up. When she wasn’t doing that she was going to the clubs with her girlfriends. Being home alone that often gave my sister plenty of time to sneak her friends over all the time. And that’s just what she did on this night. Since Ronda knew momma wasn’t coming home until midnight she called over her hoodlum friends that lived in the same tore down neighborhood as we did. After I was all cried out about my hair I feel to sleep but when I woke up I heard laughing and loud talking and smelt a funky smell. I made my way into the living room where I found Ronda and her new best friend Missy sitting on the floor smoking something that looked like a tiny cigarette . I knew what cigarettes smelt like. Mom smoked all the time but this did not smell like a cigarette and I knew Ronda was not supposed to be smoking. I didn’t let Ronda see me creep around the corner and peek in on them I stood their ease dropping on their conversation. “Girl you know my brother Marcus likes you.” “Your brother is 21. I’m too young for him.’ “Girl please his last girlfriend was only seventeen.” “Really.” “Yeah girl, you should hook up with him, then you and I would be like sisters.” She laughed. “He has a lot of money too. He sells this good shit we smoking. Plus he has stupid bitches working in the street for him.” “Working on the street, doing what?” “You know.” Missy said passing the small cigarette back to Ronda. “Girl, they on the stroll…like you know fucking and they give my brother all their money, they stupid. But I don’t care. He takes care of my Momma and me. Look at my new Nikes and my new guess jeans.” She stood up turning around. “Those are nice. I can’t remember the last time I had a new pair of shoes. My Momma only spends her money on my baby sister. She doesn’t like me.” “See that’s why you should hook up with Marcus he’ll keep you in all the tightest gear girl. I’m telling you. You want me to call him, he’ll come over here right now.” “Well…yeah I guess my Momma won’t be home until late. I guess.” I hurried back into my bedroom when I thought Missy saw me around the corner. When I passed the mirror I had almost forgotten about my hair. I began to cry again. I must have messed around with me hair in the mirror for over and hour trying to figure out how I was going to tell Momma about this. She was going to be so upset. “Go in Momma’s room.” Ronda demanded barging in our room with a tall man standing behind her. “Huh.” I adjusted my eyes to the bright light. “You heard me go sleep in Momma’s room.” “Momma said no boys in the house.” “Just get out!” She grabbed my by the arms forcing me out the room. I stumbled to me feet heading down the hall to my Momma’s bedroom crawling up into her bed, no longer than ten minutes later I heard Ronda through the walls moaning and the bed hitting against the wall. I knew what she was doing. The same thing she had done with Momma’s boyfriend.Needless to say that Marcus boy start coming over to our house almost every time Momma was gone for months and every time he would come he’d bring Ronda something new, shoes clothes all kind of things. She got to the point to where she had to sneak and hide things so Momma would not become suspicious. I guess my mom was smoking the same stuff Ronda was because she wasn’t even mad when she saw my hair. She just ran her hands threw it and said. “Oh it looks cute. Now it will be easier to manage.” I was shocked that she did not get upset or even yell at Ronda for it. It was like they were both in their own worlds. Ronda started going and coming as she pleased hanging out with her friends and stupid boyfriend Marcus and Momma stayed gone to work all the time and barely came home to put food in the refrigerator change clothes and she was gone again. It was like no one cared about me anymore. Everyone was tuned into their own lives. On day I when I was walking home from school. I saw my Momma riding in the car with some guy. She saw me too, but she didn’t even bother to wave or pick me up. She just looked at me and kept going. When I got home I asked her why she didn’t give me a ride. She told me she was riding with her boyfriend and she didn’t want him to know she had any kids. What kinda shit was that. I was just barley thirteen then and that hurt me so much. That summer I begged her to let me go stay with my grand parents in San Diego. We used to go and visit her every summer when I was younger, then all of sudden we stopped going to visit my grandparents, when my grandparents found out we where living in a shelter and my grandmother threaten my Mom to take us away from my Mom. I didn’t understand why she didn’t just let us go stay with our grandparents, then she could be with her boyfriends and we would be out of her hair. But my mom would always say that our grandparents were too nosy and she didn’t want to ask them for help. I knew it was more to it but I was too young to understand or ask what was going on. Now thirteen I was into my own little world. I didn’t have many friends I just kept to myself. Made straight A’s played on the soccer team. Ronda always came to all my games never missed a game. But we were never close anymore like we use to be. She was so involved with Marcus and Momma knew about him too now. But it was all over when the day Ronda told Momma she was pregnant. “I knew it was only a matter of time before you got you little ass knocked up.” Momma said in a clam voice. She took a long drag of her cigarette then a gulp of her beer. “Well I hope you don’t plan on brining a baby up in here.” “Marcus will take care of me!” Ronda shouted. “Don’t raise your voice at me. I’ll tell you something, no man gonna take care of you. I know first hand. You can’t depend on a man for shit and if you do you’re a got damn fool. Look at me in living in this broke down apartment barely making ends meet, where’s your daddy huh? He’s not here helping.” She blew smoke into the air looking at me. I was chomping down on my cereal sitting between them listening to their conversation just about to head out the door to school. “And Raquel’s daddy, he up and died on me. Left me all alone. You can’t depend on any man.” She stood up from the table putting out her cigarette. “How far along are you?” “I don’t know.” Ronda cried. “Marcus knows you’re pregnant?” “Yes.” “Seventeen a baby having a baby.” She shook her head. “Well you just better be up put of my got damn house before I come home from work tonight. You want to lay up with a man and make a baby and be grown, then get out of my house. I should have known you weren’t going to amount to shit. Just like your punk ass daddy.” “Fuck you!” Ronda screamed. And that was it. My Momma charged at Ronda gabbing her by her neck. She threw her up against the wall and Ronda broke away from her. But Momma caught her by the back of her shirt and knocked her dead in the mouth and then Ronda hit mom back dead in the eye. I jumped up yelling breaking them apart. Even though I was much smaller then the both of them I guess some super powers came over me because I pulled them apart. “Get the fuck out my house you little bitch! Everything I’ve done for you and you hit me!” “I’m outta here?” Ronda yelled heading towards the door. She took one last glance looking back at me and with no more words she left out the door. “You okay Momma.” I whispered afraid to approach her. “Yes. Promise me you’ll never be like your sister. Promise me!” “I won’t Momma.” I cried knelling down giving her a big hug taking a deep breathe. She struggled to get up to her feet. Later that night after mom left to work Ronda came back to get her clothes. “I’m sorry about having to leave you like this.” Ronda told me. “But you’ll be alright.” She shoved clothes in her back pack. ”You going to live with Marcus?” “Yes, we are going to be a family and have a baby.” “Will you call me?” I cried. “Come here.” She gestured for me to come over to her and we embraced in a big hug. “I love you Raquel. I’m sorry for being mean to you and stuff. I was not happy with everything. Look when I get settled and everything with Marcus you can come spend the night with me or even stay with me. Momma will start getting on your nervous too. Just know that I will always be here for you.” She gave me a soft kiss on the forehead and that was the last time I ever saw my sister again.

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Pretty Black Woman!

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