Anna Conda profile picture

Anna Conda

Now, a question of etiquette - as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?

About Me

I have a small obsession with thunderstorms and maybe just weather in general. Sometimes I drive around in storms just for fun. I've never experienced a tornado, but I could definitely give up my clit to do so. I could eat chips and salsa everyday and never get sick of it. I love spicy food, but my stomach does not. I overeat a lot. Fatty. Condiments make a meal. I’ve been in more car accidents than you can imagine. I’m nuts in the head, and get more so everyday. I love nuts (cashews, pea, almonds). Every year I develop a new fear. This year was rollercoasters. Ugh. I find myself listening to talk radio a lot these days. I’m ridiculously ticklish. I love rubbies. I’m ridiculously in love with my dog. He’s retarded. I overuse the word retarded. I’ve recently discovered that my fear of pooping in public no longer exists. Much of my reading is done on the toilet. I also do my homework on the toilet. I’m not sure I’m capable of going to the same school for more than a year in a row. I hate pills. I like to rediscover my cds. I’m obsessive when it comes to taking care of myself. I have a ridiculous amount of underwear. I secretly love teeny bopper movies and TV shows (ok, so it’s not a secret). I bet I can make you laugh…even if it’s awkwardly. I work as a Home Health Aid and I kind of love it. I love running, but lack the time to do it these days. I still act smarter than I really am. I have a memory like an elephant. I sleep on a pile of pillows. My bed is amazing. Try it, you’ll love it. I can’t tell jokes because I laugh too hard at them. Sometimes, in small doses, I like the smell of skunk. Minivans are the bane of my existence. I’m as sarcastic as they come. I can speak Russian fluently. I am Jewish. I am awkward. My birthday is September 11th. I guess I like to argue. I think this is enough information.

My Interests

weather, clenched fists, running, nuts (cashews, almonds, peanuts, sacs), mashed taders, white russians, cellos, wine, cheese, sleeping naked, makers mark/giner ale, jalapenos, salsa, jalapeno salsa creamcheese, mexican food, not having control over what comes out of my mouth, MY BED, sex, ugly things, synged things, kisses, bites, soft things, warm things, good-smelling things, winter hats, gloves, misty rain, downpours, wind, snow, the silence of winter, pillows, owning a dumb amount of underwear, pugs (dogs in general), shoes from gap kids, missing home, inventing ridiculous items that I plan on making it rich with someday (eg. the pump and piss), not cooking but baking, my lack of hobbies, reading, giving road head while im driving...what is going on here?

I'd like to meet:

Someone who has chased tornados and wants to take me with them next time they go. Someone who plays the cello and wants to teach me. People who speak Russian, cause thats funny. People who know where my quotes are from. The person who took this: Someone who wants to hunt one of those ^ down with me.Someone who owns, trains or has access to one of these retards:I like corny. I need some corny in my life.

Music:

In no particular order...nomeansno, the mars volta, tenacious D, the postal service, deftones, soulfly, GOGOL BORDELLO, world inferno friendship society, dredg, sepultura, nuclear rabbit, finger eleven, burden brothers, death by stereo, the dillinger escape plan, sikth, incubus (the science and before days), hed pe, refused, sugar ray (Floored), ratatat, korn (self titled and peachy), richard cheese, sage francis, oddzar, lamb of god, from autumn to ashes, darkest hour, a perfect circle, rezin, at the drive-in, between the buried and me, american nightmare, the white stripes, dragonforce, the sounds of you moaning from beneath me, children of bodom, dark tranquility, dog fashion disco, death from above 1979, unearth, system of a down, our lady peace, the toadies, nirvana, NIN, muse, metallica, converge, queen, stp, frank sinatra, the faint, CCR anything cellos...

Movies:

waynes world, american beauty, donnie darko, troll 2, porns about apes, old charlie chaplin movies, the dead poets society, french kiss, equilibrium, ever after, seven, the usual suspects, wet hot american summer, the matrix, identity, birdcage, life as a house, fight club, matchstick men, snatch, lucky number slevin, kill bill (1 and 2), saw, the whole nine yards...I probably haven't seen it.

Television:

family guy, buffy, gilmore girls, wildfire, grey's anatomy...my vagina is bigger than my brain.

Books:

diary, choke..anything palahnuik really, the perks of being a wallflower, the da vinci code, angels and demons, the contortionist's handbook, white noise (no not the movie), extremely loud and incredibly close, lots of brett easton ellis, some koontz...I read on the toilet.

Heroes:

LESLIE LEBEZNIC BITCH

My Blog

Domestic Goddess

So for some reason lately I have been really into baking. About a month ago it was Leslie's (the best friend) Birthday and I thought it would be fun to make her a cake. I decided on a white chocolate ...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Tue, 08 Aug 2006 07:55:00 PST

I had my elbow so far in he...

Yea ok, I've been 'tagged.' So, now I get to post 6 weird yet TRUE things about myself that you never gave a crap about anyways. If I 'tag' you then you have to do the same. Thanks Doug. 1. For as lo...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Thu, 20 Apr 2006 08:46:00 PST

Fuckin coons 2....

The eye:So if you're reading this I assume you know the story. The photo in that blog was about an hour after the whole thing happened (on friday). This is my documentary of the black eye.. One day la...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Fri, 30 Sep 2005 10:08:00 PST

assholes and toiletpaper.

  write down your name and ... 1. i'll respond with something random about you.2. i'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.3. i'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in.4. i'l...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Wed, 28 Sep 2005 11:16:00 PST

Fuckin coons.

  So it's friday night, I'm all excited that I finally got through my stressful week and the weekend is finally here. I can go out, have a few drinks, relax...tomorrow my friend is coming to visi...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Sat, 24 Sep 2005 09:20:00 PST

For those of you who hate bush...

Blaow!   Just kidding. Upon some recent prompting I searched google for the word mangina...some results: This is just stupid... hmmm.   Look at this little punim.   So I guess acc...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Right and Wrong.

In a recent search for "abortion" on google I was once again surprised by the amazing and hilarious results that the wonderful search engine spits out at you when you use it. However, I hav...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Dun da da da!

Ladies and Gentleman I would like to present to you what I proudly call, The Cocktionary. The Cocktionary is a volume of words within the english (or french) language that have been deemed "gay" or ...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

thanks google. AGAIN!

So sometimes I search for random pictures on google for whatever random stupidity I am doing at the moment and I seriously wonder where the fuck do they come up with the results of this stuff. It's li...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Sausage Pants...

We all remember these correct? What I lovingly refer to as "sausage pants." Anyways, growing up these were all I wore. I had an assortment of styles from the basic stirrup to a the fancy lac...
Posted by Titty Smalls on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST