Rip Van Winkle profile picture

Rip Van Winkle

where the dead sell death to the dying

About Me

I like loud crowded bars, dead hookers, and good books in front of a fire on a sunday night. You can usually find me in some dingy dive bar drinking whiskey sours and PBR from the can. Except for tuesday nights, that's my knitting circle.

My Interests

washed-up, on shore, the old yellow notebook out again I write from the bed as I did last year. will see the doctor, Monday. "yes, doctor, weak legs, vertigo, head- aches and my back hurts." "are you drinking?" he will ask. "are you getting your exercise, your vitamins?" I think that I am just ill with life, the same stale yet fluctuating factors. even at the track I watch the horses run by and it seems meaningless. I leave early after buying tickets on the remaining races. "taking off?" asks the motel clerk. "yes, it's boring," I tell him. "If you think it's boring out there," he tells me, "you oughta be back here." so here I am propped up against my pillows again just an old guy just an old writer with a yellow notebook. something is walking across the floor toward me. oh, it's just my cat this time.-Charles Bukowski

I'd like to meet:

Stupid rich people I can take advantage of, stupid, drunk, hot girls I can take advantage of, stupid, pretentious assholes with good contacts I can take advantage of, and any one looking for a killer for hire. Ask me about my discount rates! :)

Television:

Television is of da debil. But if you must watch it, at least watch something inspiring, educational, or original. The Office, The Daily Show, Dinner for Five, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Def Poetry, Kalifornication, Entourage, Mad Men, Pushing Daisies, and pretty much anything on Adult Swim are some of my favorites. I do have my guilty pleasures though, like Viva La Bam and Jackass. Idiocy can be an artform.

Heroes:



Ruphas the Terrible
Favorite Killing Spot: The Study
Biggest Enemy: Fat Tony
Favorite Weapon: Rusty Fork
Eyes Gouged: Fifteen
People Iced: Twenty One
Arms Broken: Ten
Car Bombs Planted: Thirty Seven
Tounges Cut Off: Sixteen

Get Your Own at Biovox.com!

My Blog

Stupid constantly changing Myspace

Where the hell did these freaking kids in my background come from?  I think MySpace hates me and wants me to die.  ...or, maybe these are ghost kids who inhabit my pc.  Spooooky  ...
Posted by Rip Van Winkle on Thu, 28 Feb 2008 04:09:00 PST

Damn the information age!

One little DUI and I'm branded for life.  I even offered the cop a beer.  You'd think he would have let me off with a warning.  But nooooo, he goes and brings it up in the trial.  ...
Posted by Rip Van Winkle on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 06:42:00 PST

I promised myself I wouldn't cry

It snowed today, another winter officially here.  Also, another winter where I didn't follow through on my promise to myself not to be here.  I'm tired of this dreary scene.  I need war...
Posted by Rip Van Winkle on Wed, 16 Nov 2005 03:02:00 PST

SHOPLIFTING MADE EASY or...... Ambition!!! and why I want no part of it

The word for today boys and girls is ambition.  I've been thinking a lot about it lately.  Mostly my lack of it and my inability to follow through on anything I start.  Why can't I ever...
Posted by Rip Van Winkle on Wed, 16 Nov 2005 04:01:00 PST