Drake - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I'm looking for my red Adidas sweatshirt. It's got a zipper in the front and a hood with a draw-string. He left home this afternoon before his father and I were awake and we haven't heard from him since. We're worried sick - I have a fever and my girlfriend is contagious (and so is her wife, we think). If you've seen this man, do not collect two hundred dollars - I'm not sure about the luxury tax. For my unborn children's sake, though, let's leave 'I'm' out of this. The only 'I'm'ing going on should be with DrakeMcSmooth. Further, what is sent to DrakeMcSmooth should be clever and insightful (to balance out the contributions Drake will be making). But seriously, I'm a kidder - Lois Lane style...

My Interests

3.5% (but then I jack it up after, like, the first year)

(this heading totally says "Interests:" on the Edit Profile screen) ...

I'd like to meet:

1. All-star quarterback Tate Jefferwall, so I can ask him how he throws the ball like that - it's unreal!
2. Those guys from the 700 Club for being so funny. Where do they get their material?
3. That silly Brit from American Idol, so that I can give him my patented World's Dumbest Idiot Award. It's made of chocolate!
4. People who complain about reality TV shows but still manage not to avoid them - they've inspired the creation of my patent-pending World's Dumbest Idiots Award. It's still made of chocolate, but it has a creamy middle and a fun candy shell!

Music:

Music is so last Fall. Firesign Theatre is so next Monday and The Goon Show is two weeks after that....

Movies:

You want what's inside the safe? Then you gotsta crack the code....

Television:

That 80s Big Hair Bands infomercial with Bobbi Brown, she hasn't aged a minute! - and, of course, Mr. Show, Larry Sanders, Ali G, and Duckman...

Heroes:

Overstuffed with extra hots, no mayo, and pepperjack cheese. Especially from White House Sub Shop in Atlantic City. Additional notes at Grinder, Hoagie, and Cold Cut..