I'm Chirish.
But you probably knew that already since I don't talk to strangers on MySpace.
You also already know I'm f'ing awesome.
Do or do not. There is no try.
Belgian Ales, beer, comedy/humor (everyone likes to have a good time; I meant live comedy), onanism, wine, music, my ipod, long form improvisational comedy, music, bodily functions, crime dramas, crime documentaries, sleeping, my bed, sleeping in my bed, tap dancing, performing improv, pretending I don't speak English.
Someone who can teach me how to skateboard and/or play the guitar.
Proficient skiers or snowboarders to take advantage of my place in Killington (but not take advantage of me)
Your mom. Seriously, she makes awesome tuna sandwiches.
Also, someone who is not a fucking choad.
Someone who doesn't have sex with minors.
No fat chicks.
Rock, Heather (formerly Satanicide), The Hazzards, The Occasion, Mr. Brownstone, Imperial Teen, Fountains of Wayne, Weezer, Rentals, Violent Femmes, Breeders, Belly, Tito Puente, Badly Drawn Boy, Cure, Le Tigre, Neutral Milk Hotel, Outkast, Metric, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, We Are Scientists, Strokes, White Stripes, Arcade Fire, Babes In Toyland, Postal Service, Deathcab for Cutie, Dr. Dre, Regurgitator, Eskimo Joe, emo, new wave, power pop, indie rock, pop rock, Britney Spears, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, DMX, Foo Fighters, Frou Frou, Jay-Z, Jebediah, Juliana Hatfield, Kylie Minogue, They Might Be Giants, Moloko, Modest Mouse, N.E.R.D, Neptunes, Smiths, Paul Westerberg, Pharrell, Pinback, Pixies, Police, David Bowie, Queen, Red House Painters, Shins, Stretch Princess, HappyLand, Talking Heads, Travis, The Who
Better Off Dead (the only ski movie that's funny because you're laughing with it, not at it), Beerfest, Grandma's Boy, Girls Just Want To Have Fun, Say Anything, Super Troopers, Heathers, The Jerk, History of the World Part I, Billy Madison, Lord Of The Rings trilogy, A Christmas Story, Strange Brew, Billy Madison, Holy Grail, Vacation, Life Aquatic, Teen Witch, So I Married An Axe Murderer, Wet Hot American Summer, Star Wars IV: A New Hope, Star Wars V: Empire Strikes Back, Godfather I&II, Rushmore
Kids in the Hall, The Family Guy, Gilmore Girls, Upright Citizens Brigade, Undeclared, Mr. Show, Law and Order, Law and Order SVU, Law and Order Criminal Intent, CSI: Miami, The State, City Confidential, Cold Case Files, American Justice, 24, Crossing Jordan, The Simpsons, Sealab 2021, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Home Movies, Freaks and Geeks, The Soup, So You Think You Can Dance (yes, I wish I was a contestant, and I also wish I was on Solid Gold)
Lolita by Nabokov, Sarah by "JT Leroy", The Heart is Decietful Above All Things by "LeRoy", Honkey by Dalton Connelly, Barrel Fever by Sedaris, American Pastoral by Philip Roth (which is apparently full of self-plagiarism), Most of Kurt Vonnegut's books, Ethan Frome by Edith Wharton (it's like the movie Very Bad Things, but without the funny parts), A Separate Peace by John Knowles, The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (especially after the revelation of about where the two Eggs were when I was getting the stitches taken out after that nasty foot picture. My sister and I parked facing the water in Great Neck at my surgeon's and she looked across and said, "I bet this is the West Egg and Plandome or Manhassett are the East Egg over there." Maybe everyone else already knows that, but only because you read about it, we were there).
Joe -
JOE MAMA!!!