MUSIC!...If the neighbours aren't complaining it's not loud enough. Grubby live music venues. Rock posturing in tight trousers.
From a time when it was cool in indie to know how to play your instrument... watch and learn scenesters:
Due to a combination of laziness and lack of interest/time:
I take forever to reply to messages (and I may forget altogether)
That comment you sent me - yeah, I might get round to accepting it soon.
People who retain the ability to keep their own head out of their arse.
Musicians.
People who think they'd like me to play guitar for them.
Melody. *tick*.
Songs. *tick*.
Talent. *tick*
Ability with chosen instrument. *tick*
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**NEW!!**
Band Categories
Following on from my personal profile categories, I felt it was time to categorise all the millions of bands that we deny in our friends request inbox everyday. Don't be shy, find your band and be at peace with what you are. :o)
- The "female fronted clueless modern rock band" -
Female singer?
Sleeveless t-shirts and modern leather biker jackets??
Short, nicely gelled spikey hair all round?
A Drummer that works out down the gym all day and insists on taking his shirt off at every gig?
Over produced songs that sound vaguely like Evanescence?
Welcome to 2007 my friends! How long did you spend waiting in the late 90's?
- The "Shoreditch fodder" band -
Braces & pork pie hat?
Slag off bands who either have nice instruments and/or can actually play them?
Undying love for the Libertines?
Read NME?
More hair than songs?
Inability tune guitars?
Don't be frightened - you can leave East London. The rest of the country doesn't bite.
- The "Self Important/Self Righteous Art Rock" band -
Had your record played by John Kennedy?
Feeling of inflated self importance?
Pompously criticise other bands on the internet because they list a commercially viable band as an influence?
On a record label named something like "Moldy Peach Sprinkle Records"?
Against your religion to be sociable with other bands you don't know?
Don't worry, you can tell your grandchildren you never sold out.
- The "Emo fodder" band -
Identifit emo style (by Topman)?
Songs that go "d-d-d-d-duh / Squeal! / Fast Bit / Slow Bit / Stop / LOUD with inaubilble vocal"?
Record company pay for your tattoos?
Groupies unable to identify which one of you they blew off last night as you all look vaguely similar after a few Jagermiesters?
You're not emo, you're hardcore (just don't let the hardcore bands here you say that - those guys are scarey...).
- The "Uber Scenester" band -
The natural evolution of the "Shoreditch Fodder" band.
More hair.
More eyeliner
More attitude.
More groupies
Even less songs
You'll probably do well for about 6 months. Maybe even get your own documentary.
- The "Circuit Fodder" band -
3 piece band with no discernable sound?
Playing at the Dublin Castle soon?
Inability to understand the EQ on your amp?
Dave from accounts at work auditioning for second guitar next week?
You're not offending anyone at least. Well, no one except for the "Self Important/Self Righteous Art Rock" band sitting in the corner whispering amongst themselves...
- The "Contemporary Funk Rock" band -
Battle for the guitar limelight between the Guitarist and Bassist?
Slap solos?
Bass player with as many pedals as the Guitarist?
Set that sounds like a 30 minute funk rock jam with little to indicate the transition of songs other than "Thank You!"?
Drummer with his shirt off (used to be in the "female fronted clueless modern rock band" before being kicked out)?
I agree - RHCP are great... but seriously Anthony Kiedis is the only one who can get away with those slightly misogynist lyrics...
..
Trading Places (the BEST film ever)
The Naked Gun films Grosse Point BlankHigh Fidelitythe Monty Python filmsShaun Of The DeadThis Is Spinal TapOffice SpaceBlur's StarShaped tour video - not exactly a film but simply one of the best things to ever be captured on film!
Family Guy
< Spaced, Big Train (anything with Simon Pegg/Nick Frost etc. - these men are utter genius), Simpsons, The Mighty Boosh, Armstrong & Miller, Reeves & Mortimer, Fry & Laurie, Family Guy, American Dad, Snuff Box - basically comedy shows...
...In fact, half of the shows I like don't run anymore :o(
"what have you come dressed like that for... like a Camden Leisure Pirate?"
Rock Biographies, Factual, Politics. Not a fiction fan.
Bernard Butler
This man is a legend.
Koss
Jeff Buckley
As is this man above... If I could be reborn as any musician it would have to be Jeff.
Johnny Marr
Jimmy Page
Do I need to tell you who this man is??
Nick Zinner is quite an impressive "new" guitarist.