My name is Thavakalai. This means "frog" in the Tamil language. I am Indian. I am also Hindu.
I currently live in Mumbai (what used to be known as Bombay). It is also known as Bollywood. Many Indian movie stars live here. As do the tens of thousands of call station operators employed by American firms.
As a matter of fact the apartment building that I help manage is occupied by many struggling actors trying to make it in Bollywood. In the meantime, they work answering calls for customers of an American electrical company. I used to get along with them well. But lately, our relationship has soured a bit. As you Americans would say, "Whatever."
I would like very much to visit America one day. Hopefully the new found attention given to my acting work will help me succeed in this endeavour. I would need to improve my English first. I was invited to a variety program in London back in the early 90s. I was also invited to Australia and have been on vacation to China and Thailand. I enjoyed those trips very much.
People are usually enthralled by my stature and appearance. At first, they see just another child. But once they realize I am a very small adult, their curiousity grows. I usually don't mind the attention and I admit it has helped my acting career. But if the staring and rude remarks become overbearing, I usually have to unleash my many martial arts moves that God has blessed me with. I have a natural talent for karate and other self defense arts.
I stand approximately 100cm tall. I believe that is 3 feet 4 inches to you Americans. You Americans can be so unaccomodating what with never having learned the metric system and all. And bombing countries into oblivion. And starving millions of people around the world with your economic sanctions. And being so very arrogant and ignorant about other people's customs and traditions. And with your Britney Spears and Madonna's. And ice hockey! I don't understand you Americans some times.
Still, I would like to visit New York someday. And I am grateful for your appreciation of my work. Thank you very much.
I would also like to thank my adult nephew Chandar for helping me translate my thoughts for all my wonderful worldwide fans. Thank you, Chandar! And thank your 6 children: Shreya, Reena, Saudeep, Dinesh, Arushi and Ravindra for all of their patience while I borrowed their father.
Thank you to Bollywood, Thank you to Kollywood, Thank you to my original agent Mansukh, Thank you to the world!
Praise and worship be unto Ganesh!
Gajaananam bhootaganaadisevitam
Kapittha jamboophala saara bhakshitam;
Umaasutam shoka vinaasha kaaranam
Namaami vighneshwara paada pankajam.
If you're not familiar with my work, here are a few clips:
Here I am breakdancing:
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Here I am kickin some serious backside:
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Here I am helping out my good friend and co-star:
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This was one of my favorite scenes:
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