The Church of Paris Hilton profile picture

The Church of Paris Hilton

Don't ask me. Just do what you do!

About Me


The Ten Commandments of Paris Hiltonians:
10) Thou shalt not answer thy critics: it only makes them feel important.
9) Thou shalt be the life of the party, even if it means pretending to be a Count or a Duchess of a totally fictitious country. Like Slombovia, where I am from.
8)Thou shalt be beautiful. That's hot.
7)Thou shalt eat whatever thou damn well pleases. But have some integrity about it.
6)Thou shalt do whatever thou damn well pleases, so long as it harms no one else.
5)Thou shalt be kind to animals.
4)Thou shalt have no other Paris Hiltons before thee.
3)Thou shalt not be desperate: at least publicly.
2) Thou shalt be courteous in dealing with other Paris Hiltonians.
1)Thou shalt strive at all times to be hot.
The 7 Deadly Sins of The Church of Paris Hilton
1) Desperation: Divas are never desperate and they certainly never look it.
2) Self-Pity. It just makes your critics more bloodthirsty.
3) Humorlessness. Laugh before your critics can...and you'll always have the last laugh.
4) Fear. Be daring, bold, intrepid and decisive, but watch out for large insects.
5) Predictability. Always keep them guessing.
6) Lack of Confidence. When you walk into a room, you need to feel like you own it.
7) Bad skin. Totally preventable, darlings.
The Church of Paris Hilton is not affiliated with Paris Hilton, the Hilton Hotels, Warner Brothers Records or any subsidiaries.

My Blog

Notes/Event etc.

I just realized that I know and have met some of the people I've noticed  on this page, but not as Hilton Runn. Hmm. Deacon J. Hilton is pretty much running this page now. I only check it every f...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Sat, 04 Nov 2006 06:15:00 PST

A quiet night at someone else's home.

My little (5'2") friend is back from (large, though boring, city) so I am sitting here writing, reviewing new adds on MySpace (The Deacon has been doing an amazing job of evangelizing) and considering...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 07:51:00 PST

NASHVILLE HALLOWEEN REPORT

Ok. Went out as I said I would, with all local Hiltonians failing to report for choir practice. TOO BAD FOR YOU! Absinthe was consumed before leaving. Three of them. Darby (my small, stuffed piglet) w...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Sun, 29 Oct 2006 07:02:00 PST

Preparations for Alcoholiday

Ok. So I am on glass deux of la fee verte and I am getting into full mode for this Hiltonoween business. I am wearing: pants by DKNY (striped black ones that I love), no pleats or cuffs. Tuxedo shirt ...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Sun, 29 Oct 2006 06:00:00 PST

Report: Last Thursday's Service (Hilton Runn)

Ok, so... My report on Thursday's service is gonna be a little shady because I did have a few drinks and have a memory that cannot be trusted. It rained and John Von was MIA, so I beat a hasty retreat...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Wed, 25 Oct 2006 05:11:00 PST

Hilton Runn SPEAKETH! Listeneth! Drinketh!

The Count of Carelessness, the Duke of Decadence, the Marquis of Madness, the Pope of the Pink Pulpit says.... Ok, I've got my second wind. Shaking off the day, got my 1071 Vic Mackeys on. Jockin...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Fri, 20 Oct 2006 05:19:00 PST

A Word from Deacon

Hello fellow Hiltonians!First let me say that I am not as great of a blogger as Runn, but I will do my best.I felt that it was time for me to acknowledge all of you. Since Runn has somewhat turned it ...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Tue, 17 Oct 2006 08:40:00 PST

Some Announcements/thoughts etc

Effective immediately, Deacon Jack Hilton will be handling all the adds and evangelizing on the Church of Paris Hilton MySpace site. Thanks, Jack! I am a lazy sod when it comes to these things. A...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Mon, 16 Oct 2006 08:19:00 PST

Thanks Minnie and Hailey!

For the footwear advice! I knew the Guccis were the way to go, but for some reason I had an uncharacteristic hesitation. I quickly channelled my inner L.A. Model and the correct answer was revealed to...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Fri, 13 Oct 2006 05:46:00 PST

Church of Paris Hilton Worship Services

Whenever two or more are gathered in Paris Hilton's name and there is fun, debauchery and drunken acts of incredible hotness, it becomes elevated far above mere alcoholic lunacy and becomes... A CHURC...
Posted by The Church of Paris Hilton on Fri, 13 Oct 2006 05:10:00 PST