Greg profile picture

Greg

It's not funny. My ass is on fire.

About Me

Wether he's hiding from the world in his manky bedroom, rocking the 'board and the stick with Slow Human Escape , keeping it real (and real surly) on the Rancho De Bastardo, being assaulted by projectile Motorhead Cds, quietly and quickly judging those around him or kicking up a jangle with Duckdive , one thing's certain... Vietnamese food is never far from Greg's mind.

My Interests

Music, sleep, creative endeavours of any kind, laying awake at night wondering what could be making that strange clicking noise, Apple, crossing the line and realising what I've done after it's too late to turn back, cheese, The Brown Household, The Bastard Ranch, herbal tea, the amazing adventures of Ol' Dirty Norgate, scuba masks, Jake, other men with grey hair in their beards, doing The Metal Dance whilst sniffing a bag of coffee, The Hammer Step, DJ's T-Bone and G-Brisket (that's a tasty brisket), the Banjo machine gun, toilet rock, bucket o' soup, people who make regular use of the phrase 'Slap me some skin, Brudda', beat poets, the Semi-Annual Bastard Ranch Rounders Tournament, The Kroeger, woofy-woofy, no-frills conversation, Valentino's, inappropriate dancing, ugly love, takin' it sleazy, late night Sev runs, Skanky Cross, two strips of bacon, The Man-Choir, prison yard harmonica solos, workplace origami, the double-buff, The BSB, people who don't think they're funny but are, in actual fact, hilarious.

Slowly Downward
Theremin World
The Voice of the City
The Voice of the Cubicle
The Voice of the Towel
The Voice of Fame
The Voice of the Rest
Learning To Love You More

I'd like to meet:

Nice people who don't suck too much, girls who don't dig jerks, anyone who's able to write their profile in the third person without listing one of their hobbies as 'writing in the third person', people who understand and appreciate the use of the double cock-chugging gesture, anyone who knows where I can find my dignity, anyone who participates in or regularly enjoys the bringing of the noise and anyone who feels the urge to stroke my ego a little bit.

Music:

Old:
The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Kinks, The Who, Jefferson Airplane, Grateful Dead, James Brown, The Meters, Funkedelic, Nick Drake, Bob Dylan, Donovan, The Velvet Underground, Frank Zappa, Tom Waits, Captain Beefheart, Miles Davis, Alice Coltrane, John Coltrane, Santana, Jimi Hendrix, John Lennon, Blind Faith, Cream, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Elton John, Mahavishnu Orchestra, Return To Forever, The Allman Brothers Band, Iggy & The Stooges, Pink Floyd, King Crimson.

Less old:
The Cure, INXS, Midnight Oil, The Flaming Lips, Kyuss, Queens of the Stoneage, Sigur Ros, Air, Fiona Apple, Boards of Canada, Triosk, Regurgitator, Custard, Snout, Helmet, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Faith No More, Fantomas, Tomahawk, Lovage, Peeping Tom, Wu-Tang Clan, Beastie Boys, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Rage Against The Machine, Sean Lennon, Elliott Smith, Dillinger Escape Plan, Refused, Slipknot, Madonna, Weezer, Primus, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Something For Kate, Smashing Pumpkins, Marcy Playground, Sharon Jones, The Soul Investigators, Eels, Radiohead, Augie March, You Am I, Massive Attack, Taffy, Book, Die, Schutstaffen, B, The Suspicious, Mighty Tight Find, Soylent, The Brothers Fitzsimmonds.

And so on and so forth.

Movies:

American Splendor, Wayne's World, anything by Woody Allen, Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Life Aquatic, Lost In Translation, Plan 9 From Outer Space, Garden State, Happiness, Punch Drunk Love, Cable Guy, Josie and the Pussycats, Moonwalker, So I Married An Axe Murderer.

Blue Dandenongs Youth Film Festival

Television:

The Simpsons, Futurama, Seinfeld, Arrested Development, Dead Like Me, Family Guy, Scrubs, X Files, Classic Albums, Video Hits, My Secret Identity, Cheaters (I know, it's the most disgusting show ever produced, but once I saw the episode where the host got stabbed I was hooked. Also, they had an albino on the other night).

Books:

The Virgin Suicides, The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, Lolita, The Love You Make, Way of the Peaceful Warrior, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, anything by David Eddings, The Master and Margarita, Cannibal, The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, A Long Way Down, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Junky, Nausea.

Heroes:

Mum and Dad. Also Aiden.

My Blog

And now...

      ...sleep.   Also, Kaoss Pad.   To quote Sir F. Durst; "Back da fuck up while we fuck dis track up".         Pure.     Genius....
Posted by Greg on Tue, 03 Apr 2007 01:13:00 PST

Double-Thinking Children.

Hidden cameras in your toilets memory banks filled to capacity with all of your embarrassments bed wetters thumb suckers and pinchers all must be destroyed (at the pound) or shipped away to a correcti...
Posted by Greg on Tue, 20 Mar 2007 11:59:00 PST

The flaming pie.

wetouchedourfingerstoourtonguesoverandoverandoverandoveragai nspiderscrawledoutofalltheheatingductsandmybellybuttonhundre dsandhundredsofinsectlegsuntilthedryrustlingandcreakingwasde afeningirandowntheha...
Posted by Greg on Sun, 18 Mar 2007 08:28:00 PST

Too difficult.

Far too difficult. Ears turned off. Far too difficult. Amateur lip-readings. Far too difficult. Advantage; taken. Dig a tunnel under a rock.Dig a tunnel under a rock.Dig a tunnel under a rock.Dig a tu...
Posted by Greg on Mon, 12 Feb 2007 10:05:00 PST

A birthday message.

Today is my 25th birthday. Seeing as I never thought I'd live this long I feel I should probably thank some people. Mum and Dad. Thanks for having impatient, and possibly drunken, sex sometime in 1981...
Posted by Greg on Mon, 29 Jan 2007 03:37:00 PST

The Ugly Hotness.

The finance man kept pushing and pushing at me until the ugly hotness started up again. But then I found this and everything quickly calmed down again. I'm still gonna sleep like a baby tonight. ...
Posted by Greg on Tue, 16 Jan 2007 08:52:00 PST

The Fuse.

School camp is over. I fried my Theremin and blackened my lungs. I drove home once in a police-fear-paranoid-sweat. Lots of words have been written in red ink. My lips appear to be attempting to slowl...
Posted by Greg on Sun, 14 Jan 2007 03:16:00 PST