Laura S

blog: www.lauralauras.blogspot.comnoema noesis experience experienced have to stay on top of sartre not let this slide......but it gets to me sometimes.....that's what I was reading at 3am in the subway platform in Harlem that night Jason Wingo showed up at the door with his dick hanging out of his underwear and well let's not go into it...............it was in his eyes he looked geeky but his eyes were from somewhere else just I don't know scary smart or something hot amazing hotI didn't like them or trust them at first I almost hated them I feel bad about it now I was such a prick I truly was.....but they grew on me. Maybe it's the way .....he was kind of aggressive/smart I don't know.....kind of took me by suprise. Hate to say that's exciting to me....if it's the right person. That intense.....and I hate to say when it happened I pictured.....can I say this here?.....actor x ....well, sort of almost raping me.......it's hard to admit but that's it and suddenly I felt something like never before....totally off..... the it wraps around me like cutting wire at night or during the day it's always right with me in front of me......sticky burning heavy a mess......I have to admit I did look down there a few times. .....blood endless painful heavy ......something being shoved out really......I did fool around with a female recently. Have to say....it was hot. But it's the same mess as men. It doesn't change. I know what I'm saying sounds harsh. I should try to be gentle here. I am a very gentle person. But the world is not. Our independence is not going to be handed to us. I can't relax, not now, not ever; not in this climate, not after everything. What can I do? Besides perform?ABOUT ME :I live in NYC, I cheer, dance, act, bike, walk, am hyperactive in general, highly aggressive, independent, a child of divorced, working parents who walked home alone, was chased by bullies and rifraff in grammar and junior high (you won't see me at my elementary school reunion--what lovely memories: that creepy town, kids chasing me, boys throwing rocks and iceballs, of course my only option was to fight back, eventually, endless me/them/me/them) watching Amityville Horror alone, listening to music in my room alone, with friends, whenever I could, not being a child, not liking children, really, to be honest----not speaking to anyone for a year and a half, until I met Lenore the black Albino and we wrote a script together, then my future stepsiblings who soon became my ex-stepsiblings, and those twin beds with Bert and Ernie that I still dream about as well as the haunted freight elevator, skating.....then we ...I'm digressing--oh yeah, and finding Playgirl magazine under my aunt's bed, and reading about this woman having an orgasm; then I took a biology class where the teacher taught us the word organism....and I thought the woman in the article....does she have plants growing down there?), then moving to Greenwich Village at age 13 (praise the Lord--outta there, that fucking awful Chicago junior high, where I was heckled by all the young Republicans for being vegetarian and standing up for animal rights....) well there's much I could say but I won't.....at some point I will.I live in New York City, Brooklyn. My passion is dance, acting, movies, the city, walking, animals (especially cats) and travel. Hopefully I won't be in NYC for this winter but some place warm, like California, FLorida, Egypt or South Africa, Colombia, Los Angeles--well, I said California. Well, my next planned trip is SA but I'm getting very mixed reports: it's horribly dangerous/it's not dangerous at all it's safe as long as you exercise caution/it's slightly more dangerous than other places, ect. ect.I am stunned every day by the amount of backlash against basic human rights that is taking place daily in this country, and I can never, for the life of me, understand why a woman's freedom is considered a threat to so many people. Even often to other women. I try and try but I can't grasp it. And why do I not feel liberated or empowered in spite of being raised to believe I was? Why is someone like me considered a threat to national security? Why am I hassled at airports?Favorite Quote: "La revolution ne se fera pas sans les femmes!"or"Without women there won't be a revolution!"from the Paris uprisings, ca. 1968umm.....? what else? Right now I'm working on two plays in NYC, Happy Hour and Three Women. And I'm auditioning, trying to keep on top of things in general. I'm reading as always.You can respectfully agree to disagree but you cannot, on my space, bash or insult us. If you do, it's bye bye....you know what I mean?Simone de Beauvoir wrote that maternity is impossible to carry out independently.....it enslaves women. Our biology did, til recently. There's always the threat....just around the corner....of that happening again. Why is women's equality such a threat? Why does that get under people's skin so much? Maybe because it's the root of all oppression?....anyway