Catalano profile picture

Catalano

The person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused.

About Me

I am an actor. I am a writer. I am a comedian. If you know anything about the people that pursue any of those careers... you probably just read the first the sentences thustly... I am an extrovert. I am neurotic. I am insecure. On the plus side... other than that I am a fairly high functioning human being.
I'm on myspace for the same reason most people are on myspace... Im terrified of being forgotten, the majority of my bizarre social behaviors can be explained with that reason. A reason d'etre if you will.
I'm afraid that if i don't make the effort I will fade out into nothingness, become totally isolated, everyone will forget about me and I will become an eccentric recluse who has conversations with himself.
Thus, here I am, spinning on the bliss-twig of ignorami.
I'm one of those people "on the verge."
The verge of what?
Somewhere between fame and a nervous breakdown.

Former Headlines:
    No wire hangers. Om Ara ba Isa Na Dhi I majored in hyperbole in college. My GPA was one million! I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. I found Jesus - turns out, he was behind the sofa all along. I don't mind coming to work, but that eight hour wait to go home is a bitch! Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand. Laugh at your problems; everybody else does. You want to be a winner? Pick a fight with a four-year-old. God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum. I think that I think, therefore I think that I am. Half the people you know are below average. Happiness isn't having what you want, it's wanting what you have.
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My personality type - ENFJ - The Teacher
Your type is known as the teacher, or the educating mentor. You also belong to the larger group, called idealists. You tend to bring out the best in other people. You lead without seeming to do so. People are naturally drawn to you. You expect the very best from people which takes the form of enthusiastic encouragement which is so charming that people try their best not to disappoint you. You share your personality type with 3% of the population. You need to feel a deep and meaningful connection to your romantic partners, and go to great lengths to understand and please your mate. Harmony is vitally important to you, and you often put others' needs before your own. You have a pretty thin skin and are easily hurt. Although you strive for harmony, when your values or ethics are violated, you can be very emotional, confrontational, and even punishing. However, you are very insightful about the underlying cause of conflicts, and an excellent communicator, so you have the tools to bring about a quick and peaceful resolution as long as you can keep control of your facilities. You want to be appreciated for your thoughtfulness and compassion. You need your partner to make a real effort to get to know you. Above all, you need to be able to express your feelings and have them taken seriously.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

"Among those I like or admire, I can find no common denominator; but among those I love, I can; all of them make me laugh." -WH Auden
"I shouldn't have to say this, but do not, under any circumstances, put Pop Rocks in your ass." -SG Woods

Music:

Sam Cooke, U2, Billy Joel, Matisyahu, Franz Ferdinand, Stevie Wonder, Prince, Nellie McKay, Arctic Monkeys, Goldie Lookin' Chain, Modest Mouse, The Darkness, Green Day, The Killers, Eminem, Keane, The Shins et al.

Movies:

Children of Men, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Office Space, Leaving Las Vegas, Secret Lives of Dentists, Requiem for a Dream, Anchorman, Wet Hot American Summer, Audition, Dead Alive, Defending Your Life, Fight Club, The Incredibles, Office Space, Indiana Jones, Sin City, Team America:World Police, Airplane!, Cool Hand Luke, Casino Royale, The Protector

Television:

LOST, Heroes, Arrested Development, Coupling (BBC version), Family Guy, Mr. Show, The State, Simpsons, Buffy, Extras, The Office, God help me American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, House, Mythbusters, Planet Earth, Man Vs. Wild.

Books:

Perfume by Patrick Susskind, Eyre Affair series by Jasper Fforde, Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs, Jennifer Government by Max Barry, Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson, The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the bicameral mind by Julian Jaynes, Watchmen by Alan Moore

My Blog

Oh my poor Aints

Despite finishing first in the division last year, my beloved Saints are back to being the Aints.  Deuce may be out for the season, which bodes well for my fantasy team but not so much for New Or...
Posted by Catalano on Tue, 25 Sep 2007 08:37:00 PST

What the hell is wrong with me?

If you know me, which at least some of you reading this blog do, you know that sometimes my mouth moves faster than my brain.  Which is great for improv.  Bad for tact.  I say stupid th...
Posted by Catalano on Mon, 24 Sep 2007 09:18:00 PST

For Fu** sake its Finally Friday

Or to put it another way... holy crap it's Friday!  I have to be off book on Sunday for the Dare Project.  RSVP now!!!  The production of Comedy of Errors I'm doing with Stages on ...
Posted by Catalano on Fri, 21 Sep 2007 09:01:00 PST

Oktoberfest

Yesterday was International Talk Like a Pirate Day... today more importantly is the start of Oktoberfest in Germany.  So whenever any of you want to buy my poor ass a beer... let me know.  I...
Posted by Catalano on Thu, 20 Sep 2007 08:34:00 PST

Breaking News! Oscar De La Hoya

This just in!!!This can't wait for my blog tomorrow.  It's just too good.  I'll bet you anything that Golden Boy, boxing legend Oscar De La Hoya is going to be on the front page of the Post ...
Posted by Catalano on Wed, 19 Sep 2007 01:04:00 PST

Stress level rising! Hulk smash!

Merciful Heavens to Murgatroyd... I've got too much on my plate right now.  Next Wednesday is the Dare Project, I am in one of the 5 shows and I wrote one the 5 shows.  There is a 7:30 and a...
Posted by Catalano on Wed, 19 Sep 2007 09:24:00 PST

Headbangers Ball

I'll now get to the story I was going to tell yesterday, but refrained due to lack of space and time.  My girl was hired to bartend at a metal concert and she asked me to stop by just so someone ...
Posted by Catalano on Tue, 18 Sep 2007 08:42:00 PST

Cheers

"Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got. Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot."It's been... well... it's been a weekend.  Before I get to that... I...
Posted by Catalano on Mon, 17 Sep 2007 09:36:00 PST

Happy Rosh HaShanah

I'm not Jewish in the least bit, but I spread the love...Have a solemn Ramadan too.2 things I want to talk about today...Firstly... New York.  It can be a rough city, but I love it.  It's ea...
Posted by Catalano on Fri, 14 Sep 2007 08:31:00 PST

Sorry about humpday

Hey, sorry I skipped out on you all yesterday.  Had a kinda rough day... but hopefully I've kicked this bug that's been pestering me.  Firstly, I'm flabberghasted that I've shot up over 5000...
Posted by Catalano on Thu, 13 Sep 2007 08:28:00 PST