kansas profile picture

kansas

it's fun to have fun, but you have to know how...

About Me

this machine kills fascists. i aim to misbehave. not a very nice person. but very honest. here's the deal. recently, i am very angry. i've got anger. i'm so angry that dogs have stopped liking me. so have little kids. just filled with an irrational rage. it comes out from time to time, often in the form of bawdy haiku. i don't really sleep much or often. i think that tall people are just plain better than short people. some of my best friends are short, but they just aren't as smart, funny, or talented as their taller, more attractive neighbors. i met george clinton in the early 90s. he walked up to me, silhouetted within a halo of sunlight, and asked me for a basketball. i then watched the strangest pick-up game of all time: whirling action counterbalanced by a tall, broad, dread-locked funk-god standing stock-still at the free-throw line surrounded by ballin' p-funk all-stars. the man in the flowing robes would catch the ball, and motion would stop, all eyes upon him, as he studied both the hoop and the semi-inflated ball in his hands. slowly, deliberately, george clinton sent a perfect granny-shot arcing towards the basket, getting nothing but net. time started again... that was a good day. also, heidi klum once asked me to look at her ass... that was a good day, too.

My Interests

i'm currently rehearsing AS YOU LIKE IT, with poortom productions! it's an all-male cast, and i'm playing rosalind. we're performing at HERE ARTS CENTER from march 15th-31st!www.here.org/see/nowwww.myspace.com/poortomproduct ionswww.poortomproductions.comMORE TO COME!!!

I'd like to meet:

groupies, fraggles and muppets. and the thundercats. i'd like to meet them.

..!

Music:

tom waits, dan bern, bright eyes, magnetic fields, the dresden dolls, belle and sebastian, flaming lips, the killers, new york dolls, richard cheese, me first and the gimme gimmes, gnarls barkely, yeah yeah yeahs, lou reed, low, talking heads, metallica, alice in chains, 80s new wave, psychedelic furs, the cure, white zombie, faith no more, strong-bad, charlie, miles, and sonny, lyle lovett, zappa, tom jones, dave wilcox, dave brubeck, pale, still pissed at yoko, nellie mckay, john hartford, claude bolling, crash test dummies (give yourself a hand), peter mulvey, david bowie, spandau ballet, metallica, wyclef, the RZA, marc broussard, taj mahal, black jack johnson, walker's run, the postal service, and many many more.

Movies:

ghostbusters, the philadelphia story, sid and nancy, 123, sullivan's travels, witness for the prosecution, my man godfrey, his girl friday, killing of a chinese bookie, strangers on a trail, sullivan's travels, the day the earth caught fire, the miracle of morgan's creek, velvet goldmine, the hunger, ride the high country, the man who fell to earth, the man who shot liberty valance, bring me the head of alfredo garcia, fletch, labyrinth, last temptation of christ, three amigos, 7 days in may, on the beach, murder by death, night of the living dead, repulsion (single scariest movie...maybe a tie with audition, which is also terrifying), hard-boiled, pete's dragon, horror express, hot lead and cold feet, private eyes, the dark crystal, a pure formality, legend of 1900, tron, krull, the goonies, love me if you dare, my best fiend, anything klaus kinski, one from the heart, rumblefish, brother from another planet (anything joe morton or john sayles), the shining, dr. strangelove, lawrence of arabia... alec guinness, all the president's men, coen bros (just up to lebowski), sleuth, bound, once upon a time in the west, shakes the clown, down by law, all the pre-remake michael caine movies, atomic cafe, picnic at hanging rock, shalom y'all, CSA, seven days in may, on the beach, cloak and dagger, can't buy me love (ah, cindy mancini), the court jester, scaramouche, the mark of zorro (not the MASK of zorro), zorro the gay blade, singin in the rain, holiday inn, destry rides again, the party, and if you've read this far, we need to get together and have some fun...

Television:

the muppet show (and the fraggles), the west wing, ER, the wire, nova, undeclared, dawson's creek, the office, the larry saunders show, mr. show with bob and david ("it's a box of big black dildoes"), FIREFLY, six feet under, family guy, I claudius (..$%..% brilliant!), danger: UXB, fawlty towers, lonesome dove, gormenghast, mythbusters, south park, cheers, benson, greatest american hero, matlock, tinker tailor soldier spy, extras, the office

Books:

david sedaris, carl hiassen, george r.r. martin, the glass castle, the plot against america, american pastoral, the human stain (i'm on a philip roth kick), invisible man, the island at the end of tomorrow, on the beach, the thin red line, the flags of our fathers, ugly americans, diamond, salt, It must be beautiful, the deptford trilogy, the end of time, the first three minutes, zero, lewis carroll, the code book, the three musketeers, ender's game, the invention of the human, the empty space, the diamond age, Robert Jordan, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell, Winter's Tale, snowcrash, everything is illuminated, confederacy of dunces, the devil's dictionary, lamb (the gospel according to biff, christ's childhood pal), where the sidewalk ends, where the wild things are, phantoms, insomnia, how to draw comics the marvel way, life of pi, anything by ethan hawke, prayer for owen meany, madeline l'engle, harry potter, orson scott card, sleeping with the devil, devil in the white city, skinny dip, live from golgotha, burr

Heroes:

i need more heroes. i want more people in my life that jump blindly into impossible tasks. people that strive. people that lay in wait, ready to pounce on me. my parents are absolutely amazing. no one on earth makes me as consistenly baffled and surprised. thankful for them every day of my life. also, people unafraid of speaking their MINDS (not their reflexes, but their thoughts and passions)...barack obama, dennis moore, dayton moore, wesley clarke, c.k. dexter haven, dr. teeth and the electric mayhem...

My Blog

buy yer tickets now.

hey, guys. this is just a little update about AS YOU LIKE IT. i really think it's going to be a terrific show. the guys in the cast are wonderful, and the director's great. we're already getting amazi...
Posted by kansas on Mon, 26 Feb 2007 08:56:00 PST

don't sleep, don't mope...what do you do?

in the dramatic resurgence of my insomnia (this wonderful and really painful stepping up in the LEVEL of no-sleep is due to sickness, not just over-thinking life, love, and literature), i've experienc...
Posted by kansas on Sun, 25 Feb 2007 11:27:00 PST

god damnit

i'm sick again. it seems that since i moved to new york, i now get sick about 5-7 times a year. before, it was maybe twice, and never for long. now, each time might last a day or a month. driving me i...
Posted by kansas on Sat, 24 Feb 2007 09:43:00 PST

rehearsal skirts

so. rehearsal skirts. yup. that's a new experience for me. hard to get up from a kneeling position wearin one of those bad boys... (it's part of the BLOCKING, weiselberglar)how to move and act like a ...
Posted by kansas on Sun, 18 Feb 2007 10:32:00 PST

gotta say. this guy knows something...

...
Posted by kansas on Fri, 16 Feb 2007 01:13:00 PST

AIM

hey, people. i now have joined the 90's. i have iChat. so, all you IMers out there, look me up as "[email protected]"that is all... for now.
Posted by kansas on Fri, 16 Feb 2007 08:18:00 PST

whoa whoa whoa WHOA...

let's put a stop to this right now... anna nicole smith had about as much in common with marilyn monroe as r kelly has with grace kelly... this is ridiculous. while we're at it, farley was not belushi...
Posted by kansas on Fri, 09 Feb 2007 05:33:00 PST

myspace

a little disturbed, though i can't really communicate why that is...i just logged-on, and there were two links presented to me, side by side (by tommy mcgoogleson, the weird, t-shirt bedecked icon guy...
Posted by kansas on Thu, 08 Feb 2007 01:17:00 PST

as you like it...

wow. okay. so, kids, i've just been cast as rosalind in an all-male AS YOU LIKE IT, to be performed at the HERE arts center next month. i'm absolutely blown away by the people involved, and i can't wa...
Posted by kansas on Wed, 07 Feb 2007 10:01:00 PST

they're the best...around...

this is incredible. dibs on the movie rights (that's how movie rights are handled, right?)CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. - A NASA astronaut charged with attempting to kidnap a romantic rival in a love triangle...
Posted by kansas on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 07:32:00 PST