I collect glow sticks. I do this so that one day I will own every last one of them thereby stopping people from looking like assholes and listening to techno. I even want to get the ones from the guy who hangs out atop Cumberland Farms. I also collect food inside of me. I have trouble holding it for long because all the cheese has brought on irritable bowel syndrome. As of late I have been reading a lot of my neighbors' mail. Hey, if they're not going to watch their mailbox they can't get upset when someone takes their bills and replaces them with sandwich bags full of piss.
Corky from Life Goes On. Oh, wait... I did. At SeaWorld, Orlando nonetheless.
My main man says that farts are jazz to assholes but I have found that assholes usually listen to 70's rock.
I like to watch a lot of movies about Jesus because most of them depict the last supper. I can't imagine all that delicious ancient food being on my table. There were no pesticides used back then so I know that my kidney problems would go away. I like the movie Cannibal Blood Bath IV: Only the Good Tast Done because there are so many instances where you can see the ghost of the grip who killed himself on the set of the Wizard of Oz. I used to have a U2 dvd but I think my sister sold it on half.com. I also like watch the flip books I make.
One word: I Love the Food Network!
I read Betty Crocker cook books for inspiration and I read Jack T. Chick religous cartoons for something to wipe my ass with.
Nathan of Nathan's Hot Dogs, Ray Crock of McDonald's, Dave Thomas of Wendy's and Grace Under Fire, Michael Pickled of Pickled Pig's Feet, Elliot Sausage of Sausage.