Dear God, please help me

Why did you give me so much desire? When there's nowhere I can go to offload this desire? And why did you give me so much love in a loveless world? When there's no-one I can turn to to unlock all this love? And why did you stick me in self-depricating bones and skin? Jesus, do you hate me?
Sing me to sleep and then leave me alone. Don't try to wake me in the morning cos I will be gone. Don't feel bad for me I want you to know, deep in the cell of my heart I will feel so glad to go.
5:15, I'm changing trains. This little town let me down. This pouring rain brings me down. 5:15, train overdue, angels have gone. No ticket. I'm jumping tracks, I'm changing towns. We never talk anymore, forever I will adore only you.
Yes I am blind, no I can't see the good things, just the bad things. Yes I am blind, no I can't see the good things, there must be something horribly wrong with me. God come down if you're really there, well you're the one who claims to care!
I know I'm unloveable, you don't have to tell me. Message recieved loud and clear, loud and clear. I don't have much in my life, but take it it's yours.
All I've done, I've done for me. All you gave, you gave for free. I gave nothing in return, and there's little left of me. All the days of my life, all the days of my life, all the days I owe you. In red-eyed pain I'm knocking on your door again, my crazy brain in tangles, pleading for your gentle voice, those storms keep pounding through my head and heart. I pray you'll soothe my sorry soul all the days of my life . . .
Trouble loves me, trouble needs me. Two things more then you do, or would attempt to. So console me, otherwise hold me. Just when it seems like everything evened out and the balance seems serene...Trouble loves me, walks beside me, to chide me, not to guide me. It's still much more then you'll do.
Good times for a change. See, the luck I've had can make a good man turn bad. So please, please, please let me get what I want this time. Haven't had a dream in a long time. See, the life I've had can make a good man bad. So for once in my life let me get what I want. Lord knows it would be first time.
I'm not a prophet or a stone age man, just a mortal with potential of a superman, I'm living on. I'm tethered to the logic of Homo Sapien, can't take my eyes from the great salvation of bullshit faith. If I don't explain what you ought to know you can tell me all about it on the next Bardo. I'm sinking in the quicksand of my thought, and I ain't got the power anymore. Don't believe in yourself, don't deceive with belief, knowledge comes with death's release.
:: PERSONAL INFO ::
My name is Demuthy. I'm a MORRISSEY and DAVID BOWIE fan. I have seen Morrissey live six times [Glasgow, London, Berlin, Hamburg, Manchester] and Bowie live three times [Hammersmith Odeon, Wembley Arena, and 'Friday Night With Jonathan Ross] and nothing can ever compare in life to these moments of pure happiness and completition.
I'm a writer, when I feel like it I'm an artist, and I'm a vegetarian.Meat Is Murder kids, let's not forget that!
The world is a horrid place, and life is a serious of misfortune events. But worst of all this world is full of crashing bores...but I am not one!