I'm just used to being hated. There isn't anybody out there that could last 2 minutes in my world. All the abuse, deaths of people closest to me & just pure hatered in my life. If you had to go through half of what I went through, you would have commited suicide a long time ago. I don't trust nobody. I mean, I don't love nobody, nobody loves me or is ever here for me. I don't even love myself so why should they? I hate myself & what I've become, I hate everything in my world. And all the times that I say I don't need nobody are the times when I usually need somebody the most. I'm just a 220 pound raging beast that nobody has any respect for. I don't care weather I live or die, so what. I fell in love with hate, it's in such an abudance & that's all I got. To me, love only exists for other people & in movies. On May 29'th I'll begin a 90 day jail sentence for something I didn't do, so don't look for me. Because of that, I'm very self destructive right now, so fuck it. Who's gonna tell me, who's gonna stop me from what I can do? I mean, what makes the difference if I'm hated in society or in prison... who cares? I wanna love you, I wanna love everybody but first you gotta love me too, you know? You just can't love me.
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