Keith profile picture

Keith

To Wierd To Live, To Rare To Die.

About Me

I'm very Lucky to live in the little village of Denham Green, nestled amongst the Woods, Lakes and Valleys of The Chiltern Hills in Merrye Olde Englande. I'm blonde, left handed, dyslexic and very superstitious. I like animals especially cats, dogs, badgers, horses and orangutans. I campaign endlessly for the recognised protection of the near extinct, Lesser Spotted, Albino Funphenschnaffle. I once pierced my ear with a safety pin, it bled and hurt a lot. I don't need any tattoos or piercings because I have many scars in unique and interesting places. I cycle and swim over long distances, regularly. I own and can play an electric guitar and a didgeridoo, although I admit, I need to practice more. My true talents are mostly found in the Visual medium. I work in TV Production, in various roles (Transmission Technician, Director, Lighting/Camera Operator, Sound Engineer, Vision Mixer, Editor). I own and run Keith Sage Photography. I am a Professional Photographer, with the qualification of Licentiateship Membership of The British Institute of Professional Photographers, L.B.I.P.P. I cover most aspects of Photography including Portraiture, (Formal/Informal), Commercial/Advertising, Society/Event, Fashion/Glamour, Industrial/Architectural, Nature/Landscape and occasional Press/Editorial work. I have a mobile studio and can arrange to hire locations for a more specific shoot. Please do not hesitate to contact me, should you require a quote, all work will be considered at a competitive rate, guaranteed! I can offer a consultation, photographic shoot, all developing/photoshopping, printing and a CD copy of the original work for you to make any additional prints from ,copywrite free.To keep my mind occupied, from time to time, I like to write screenplays, novellas, short stories, poetry, haiku and songs.Always Smiling and Groovy Groovy. There's No Rush, take it Softly Softly. Keep Your Fingers Crossed, Touch Some Wood And I'm Sure All, Will Eventually Be Good!

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My Interests

I like Mountain Biking, BMX, Body Boarding, Swimming, Snorkeling, Scuba, Kayaking, Canoeing, Climbing, Capoiera, Bowling, Basketball, Shooting, Film, Animation, Photography, Illustration, Art, Sculpture, Astronomy and Collecting Spoons, exceptionally shiny ones. I Love the Great Outdoors, especially Forests. I enjoy being outside, whatever the weather day or night. On a clear night I can name, by sight, almost every large constellation of stars in the Northern Hemisphere. I like watching the Aurora Borealis (i've seen it only twice) and shooting stars(I've seen thousands). I have appeared on UK National TV at the 1999 ITV Comedy Awards, I was visible for 3.5 seconds standing behind Jerry Springer. I worked at Pinewood Studios for over three years on TV shows that include The Weakest Link, My Family, Catherine Tate, Survivor and An Audience with Robbie Williams. I also worked on the first two series of the award winning 'Something Special' for the BBC. I appeared in the pilot episode of Careoke which is now in its second series on French TV. I was a member of Roskilde Festival Radio, broadcasting all over Denmark from 2003-2004, providing the English speaking 'Whatever' show. I worked as an assistant at Graham Reading Photography and as a Photographer for various local papers, one of my pictures was printed in a copy of the Daily Mirror. I once served an ice cold beer to Sir John Mills, recreating my favourite scene from the classic film Ice Cold In Alex. My eyes are mainly green with small flecks of yellow, grey and black. I am able to hold my breath underwater for over two minutes. I can bend the tips, of all my fingers on my right hand, at a 45 degree angle, without touching them with my left hand. I know how to say "Hello, How are you?", "Thankyou" and "Cheers!" in over 16 different languages. So far I've travelled to over 21 different countries and Islands, including most of Mainland Europe and as far as Southern Egypt, 2 out of 7 continents isn't bad. I'm still to discover the rest of the World and I can't wait until I do! I have a weakness for Japanese,(Katsu Curry) Mexican(Fajitas/Burritos) and Italian(Pizza/Bolognese)Cuisine. My favourite beer is Asahi Super Dry, my favourite spirit is Disaronno Amaretto. I like cheese, but not Camembert, it stinks! I like Jaffa Cakes and Plain Chocolate. I prefer Tea, 1 sugar, lots of milk. I can be found On b3ta.com as 42. I have a habit, like Lord Byron, of listing things in a random, non alphabetical order.

I'd like to meet:

As many people that I can in one Lifetime!

Music:

Kings of Leon, Squarepusher, Toots & The Maytals, UltraMagnetic MC's, Jimi Hendrix, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Sy, Matt Monro, Smokey Robinson, Origin Unknown/Andy C, Regina Spektor, Samuel Barber, The Rolling Stones, Ibrahim Ferrera, Bob Dylan, Bob Marley & The Wailers, The Chemical Brothers, The Kinks, Green Day, DJ Marky, Nirvana, The Black Keys, Adam Freeland, Shirley Bassey, LTJ Bukem, The Doors, The Beastie Boys, John Lee Hooker, Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, The Specials, Public Enemy, Aphex Twin, Common, The Velvet Underground, Roni Size, The Supremes, Morning Runner, Kraftwerk, BB King, The Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Louis XIV, Kanye West, The Beatles, Venetian Snares, Django Reinhardt, Kid Spatula, The Pixies, DJ Shadow, The Marvelettes, The Beach Boys, Roots Manuva, Chikinki, The Mosquitos, James Brown, Portishead, Nina Simone, Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr, The Vandellas, The Black Eyed Peas, Al Green, Gorillaz, Massive Attack, Ez Rollers, Cassette Boy, Air, Jurrasic 5, Louis Armstrong, DJ Hype, Blur, Ocean Colour Scene, Coldcut, Stevie Wonder, Tony Bennet, Oasis, Shy FX, Leftfield, Cream, Herbie Hancock, Manu Chao, DJ Q Bert, Cornelius, Jefferson Airplane, The Prodigy, Edith Piaf, Nightmares On Wax, Fats Domino, Maximo Park, Motorhead, Buddy Rich, Soundgarden, Operation Ivy, Madness, Omara Portuando, Captain Beefheart, Altern8, The Beta Band, Fat Boy Slim, N.E.R.D, Grateful Dead, Beth Orton, Travis, Foo Fighters, Daft Punk, The Happy Mondays, Chubby Checker, Soulwax, The Kooks, The Stereophonics, The Pharcyde, LCD Soundsystem, Johnny Cash, Cypress Hill, The Neptunes, 808 State, The Libertines, Hot Chip, Primal Scream, Goldie, The Charlatans, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, House Of Pain, Johann Pachelbel, Pop Will Eat Itself, Mike Oldfield, Bassbin Twins, Coldplay, David Bowie, Rage Against The Machine, Cast, Arctic Monkeys, Alicia Keys, Le Tigre, Peaches, Queen, Smashing Pumpkins, The Who, Queens Of The Stone Age, Jack Johnson, Babyshambles, Bjork, Eartha Kitt, Beck, Pearl Jam, Kasabian, Charlie Parker, Jamiroquai, Squeeze, Weezer, The Polyphonic Spree, Led Zeppelin, Jackson And His Computer Band, Yo La Tengo, Snap, New York Dolls, Arthur Russell, Wolfmother, Lily Allen, Benny Benassi, Mary Wells, Chet Baker, Tito Puento, Toy Dolls, Glorybox, The Motherscratchers, Slag Rabbit, The Wombats

Movies:

North By Northwest, Goldfinger, From Russia With Love, Vertigo, Ice Cold In Alex, The Black Cat, Dr. No, Lawrence Of Arabia, V For Vendetta, Apocalypse Now/Redux, Kind Hearts And Coronets, The Lady-Killers, Zulu, Dr. Strangelove, True Romance, The Bridge On The River Kwai, Harvey, Village Of The Damned, Star Wars, Where Eagles Dare, Sin City, Amores Perros, Thunderball, Pump Up The Volume, You Only Live Twice, Rashomon, The Man In The White Suit, Anchorman, The Eagle Has Landed, Diamonds Are Forever, The League Of Gentlemen, Yojimbo, The Italian Job, Sanjuro, WarGames, Withnail & I, School For Scoundrels, Mononoke-hime, Belle De Jour, The Seven Samurai, His Girl Friday, Game of Death, Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi, Dodgeball, Hauru no ugoku shiro, The Longest Day, The Fifth Element, Zatiochi, Team America, Sonatine, Arsenic And Old Lace, 28 Days Later, Gunga Din, Life Aquatic, Sono otoko, The Departed, Fist Of Fury, Children Of Men, Return Of The Dragon, Scarface, Enter The Dragon, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Shopping, A Bridge Too Far, Lik Wong, Beetlejuice, Carry On Up The Khyber, La Haine, Battle Royale, Les Vacances de Monsieur Hulot, Brighton Rock, Get Carter, The Birds, 2001 A Space Odyssey, Platoon, Carry On Nurse, The Goonies, Un Chien Andalou, The Mouse That Roared, Alfie, Two Way Stretch, Destination Tokyo, Eyes Wide Shut, The Philadephia Story, Lost Boys, Indiana Jones, Mr. Lucky, Pulp Fiction, Monkey Business, To Kill A Mocking Bird, Kill Bill, Predator, Resevoir Dogs, Aliens, To Catch A Thief, Shrek, Operation Petticoat, Top Gun, Notorious, Lock Stock And Two Smoking Barrels, The Matrix, The Deerhunter, The Graduate, A Clockwork Orange, The Battle Of The Sexes, Saving Private Ryan, Boys In The Hood, Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind, Carlito's Way, Dog Town & The Z Boys, War of The Worlds, Bringing Up Baby, Rambo, Back To The Future, Big Trouble in Little China, The Godfather, Carry on Doctor, The Battle of Britain, The Man Who Would Be King, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Goodfellas, The 39 Steps, Ghost Dog: Way Of The Samurai, Killing Zoe, I Was Monty's Double, Get Carter, Red Dawn, In Which We Serve, China Town, The Jerk, Super Fly, The Prestige, Shaft, Sparticus, The Shining, Jackie Brown, Jarhead, Black Fist, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Blue Velvet, Foxy Brown, Our Man In Marrakesh, I'm gonna git you sucka, Boogie Nights, Those Magnificent Men In Their Flying Machines, Smokey and The Bandit, Austin Powers, Cannonball Run, I'm Alright Jack, Super Troopers, Shogun Assasin, Operation Snatch, Blow, Braindead, Basquiat, Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle, Carlton-Brown Of The F.O., Meet The Feebles, Blue Murder At St. Trinians, Colditz Story, The Way To The Stars, Lucky Jim, Night of The Hunter, The Naked Truth, Gremlins, The Green Man, Close Encounters Of The Third Kind, Too Many Crooks, Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Young Sherlock Holmes, Voltron, Empire Of The Sun, Born On The Fourth Of July, Hell Drivers, Hunt For The Red October, Tequila Sunrise, Dog Soldiers, Batman Begins, The Dambusters, American Pyscho, King Kong, The Face Of Fu Manchu, Crooks Anonymous, A Pair Of Briefs, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Carry On England, It, Sleepy Hollow, Navy Seals, Carry On Doctor, Hot Shots, Tango & Cash, Carry On Matron, The Thomas Crown Affair, Blackball, Carry On Dick, Universal Soldier, Very Important Person, Up From The Beach, Jaws, Private's Progress, Bad Taste,Y tu mama tambien, Carry On Constable, La Mala educacion, Iron Monkey, The Motorcycle Diaries, Short Circuit, A Passage To India, Bluejuice, Way Of The Gun, Batteries Not Included, Babel, Oh What A Lovly War, Doctor At Large, Enemy At The Gates, Shaolin Dolemite, Equilibrium, Citizen Caine, Gattaca, Big, Doctor In Love, A.I., Endless Summer, Road To Perdition, Secretary, Doctor In Distress, Snatch, The Captain's Paradise, Little Miss Sunshine, Gamera tai uchu kaijû Bairasu, Blades Of Glory, The Black Windmill, Foxhole In Cairo, Private Angelo, Those Magnificent Men in Their Flying Machines or How I Flew from London to Paris in 25 hours 11 minutes, Harlem Nights, Apocalypto, Sammy's Super T-Shirt, Bound, Waynes World, E.T.

Television:

Lost, The Avengers, The Prisoner, Quatermass, Doomwatch, Teachers, This Life, The Flumps, The Wombles of Wimbledon, Postman Pat, The Muppets, Fraggle Rock, Monty Python, The A-Team, The Dukes Of Hazzard, Faulty Towers, Open All Hours, Dad's Army, Porridge, Desmond's, Macgyver, Prison Break, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Arrested Development, Bush Tucker Man, Ray Mears, Steve Irwin, Stoppit & Tidyup, Rentaghost, Transformers, He-Man, Thundercats, Bravestarr, Mysterious Cities Of Gold, Ullysses 31, Battle Of The Planets G Force, Jayce & The Wheeled Warriors, Dogtanian & The Muskerhounds, Bananaman, Voltron, Knightmare, The Simpsons, Futurama, Family Guy, American Dad, Drawn Together, Malcolm in The Middle, Brasseye, Alan Partridge, Saxondale, The Office, Extras, Johnny Briggs, Baywatch (Season 1), OZ, The Green Hornet, Kung Fu, Shogun, Dexter, Sleeper Cell, Weeds, Heroes, Howards End, Treasure Hunt, The Antiques Roadshow, Time Team, The Tube, The Word, The Big Breakfast, TFI Friday, Pimp My Ride, The Mighty Boosh, Mitchell & Webb.

Books:

Ian Fleming, George Orwell/Eric Arthur Blair, Alistair Maclean, John Buchan, Frederick Forsyth, Philip K. Dick, Hunter S. Thompson, Agatha Christie, Douglas Adams, Spike Milligan, Edward Lear, Alex Garland, Stephen King, Rudyard Kipling, Jane Austen, Roahld Dahl, William Shakespeare, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Miguel de Cervantes, Robert Louis Stevenson, Daniel Defoe, Lord George Byron, Sun Tzu, Edgar Allan Poe, H.G. Wells, P.D. James, H.P. Lovecraft, Mao Zedong, Jack Higgins, Confucius, the Bronte Sisters, Daphne Du Maurier, William Golding, Anthony Burgess, Lewis Carroll, John Le Carre, Bernard Cornwell, C.S. Forester, C.S. Lewis, E.M. Forster, D. H. Lawrence, Graham Green, Charles Dickens, Evelyn Waugh, Robert Ludlum, Bertolt Brecht, Antonin Artaud, Jean-Paul Satre, Arthur C. Clarke, Aldous Huxley, William S. Burroughs, Jack Kerouac, John Wilmot 2nd Earl of Rochester.

Heroes:

Cary Grant/Archibald Alexander Leach, Sir John Mills, Patrick Macnee, Lord Byron, John Wilmot 2nd Earl of Rochester, Terry Thomas, Tommy Cooper, Ian Fleming, Harry Houdini.

My Blog

Friday Joke !!!

Hello There Sugar Tits! My 1st Blog on Myspace, Woo Yay Houpla !!! I'm working this week, so far I've only F*cked up a couple of things... roll on Sunday!!! Here Goes, strap yourself in...  &nb...
Posted by Keith on Fri, 11 Aug 2006 06:48:00 PST