To me, a fun night is: Slam dunking from the three point range at the buzzard, dying of a heart attack on the half court line, resurrecting a little after noon the following day to the beat of a catchy, catchy lil' tune.
Marty: Doug, how come this box says "Interests" on the "Profile Edit" screen but reads "General" when we go live buddy?
Doug: Fuck u!
I'd like to meet:
I would like the opportunity to directly interface with the abstract of all man’s labors, ever. You know, all that flippin' work everybody does? All those papers processed and filed, all that data stored on floppy disks and in data centers, all the chops on the trees, all the milking of cows, harvesting and cooking of food, all the little hairs snipped, animals sheered, wool spun, blankets woven, guitar strings strummed, film recorded, bees and trees birds and flowers, the emerging super powers from way back when, pigs on the wing, pelicans dinning on your fish, gramps dryin' the dishes, toddler makin' birfday wishes, foot in the puddle, dispersed huddle, doink on the helmet and complete fuddle, 2 yard gain, classy brain, highbeams, day dreams of steam dissapate and dry, still, we gotta whoe lotta mo' thyme. You know what I mean, all that silly work everybody does!!! Oh, and my mom 3
Music:
Is Music not life? Notes are the blood cells that flow through THE veins providing oxygen to the rest of THE body, pumped by the rhythmic beat of THE heart, keepin' MY soul groovin' baby.
In other words, the display on my stereo receiver is synonymous to that of a cardiographs - once it flat lines, Im fuggin dead already...I flat lined the otherday. It was horrible. My list had been traversin' tracks fer like the last 3 months or something and I had forgot. Luckily my cellphone rang just long enough to revive and fuel my journey all the way to the play button.
I may have lathered up a warm hum around contribution evocation, simply by jammin' on my steam powered clavichord equipped with a belt driven metronome fitted with revolving runners for magnetic acrylic penguins to articulate composition ala bedpan gizmo-apparatus stylee, augmenting the original recipe for aural concoctions derived primarily of top notch delicious ingredients, tin cans and moog synthesizers.
Television:
Once I almost stayed up an entire night watching love boat reruns on a 14" black and white TV that was capable of UHF & VHF reception. She also had a sensitive temper. I recall fiddling with the rabbit ears if I were to as much as sneeze with out covering my mouth. It was then, years later, I'd realize that TV could potentially have a firm grasp on me. So in retaliation, I turned the thin black plastic grooved knob counter clockwise 'til she popped back at me violently. With her last bit of might, a final flash was unleashed, flooding the darkened room with photons as the ray tube contracted like a cinching noose. I fell asleep to the soft sounds of the capacitors dissipating their charge like raindrops falling on rice paper; while residual electrons on the saturated screen and charged retinas, faded away, in search of new purposes.
Books:
I know a guy who has an uncanny knack for always choosing the 'right' path in those “choose your own adventure books†- well, he disappeared like 5 years ago... so I attributed his absenteeism to how some people are really awesome at video games that are modeled after aspects of real life but really just suck at life… and figured he had fallen down a mine shaft or something. One day, I get a letter from him and it turns out the Government “captured†him and supposedly detains him in some mountain, God knows where… He writes that they infuse him with a steady flow of caffeine pumped directly to his heart while he constantly solves Rubik’s Cubes ™. These Rubik’s cubes are hooked up to some sort of machine that analyzes his every decision while monitoring his vital signs. The government applies this harvested logic to everything from war strategy to inner-city stoplight algorithms that warrant the flow of traffic... it’s pretty amazing and he says it’s a lot of pressure. Supposedly, he’s going to write an autobiography about the treatments and his experiences... I may read that...
Or not.
I'll tell you whats a great read: my User Manual. Now, where the hell did it go? ; )
Heroes:
Thanks to the labors of our past centuries finest physicist and our gradual realization of not understanding anything about quantum physics, I take delight in knowing that in some parallel universe, I’ve made all the “right movesâ€... And sometimes I, in other ‘universes', stand at the shelf of the proverbial sidelines and cheer myself on, thus making me a better person in the most probable of outcomes that we all refer to as the 'now' - I like to call it “quantum-reasoning†(did I coin a new term?) Everybody around me calls it hindsight and planning... Well you are all crazy! But I love ya! C=8
