DEVIL DAVE - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Welcome to my fucking space.I play guitar in Dallas metal band THE SEVER DISPLAY...I am a FUCKING PRICK......I piss people off on a regular basis....I slaughter possums for fun......I think organized religion is funny......I won't pay money to see you naked, you dirty whore......I like knocking shit down......I like sex.... very much, in fact....I drink battery acid and eat nails on special occasions....I like burning stuff... especially human flesh.....I don't care about how much you spent on your clothes.... they make you look stupid.I eat children....I like burying my face between a big ol pair of titties......I don't pick my nose, but if I did, I'd wipe it on you....I shave my pubic hair on a weekly basis....I don't care about your fake tits or your bleached hair or how hot shit you think you are, you vain bitch....I think any dude who's got a pic of himself standing there like a faggot without his shirt on for his main profile pic needs to be castrated and shat on....I hate vain people (in case you haven't figured that out yet... retard...)I poop on whores....I sodomize little animals....I like dead baby jokes....I think anyone who watches Laguna Beach or The Real World on MTV on a regular basis deserves to be bitchslapped and forcefed my big Italian cock.......yeah that's right........In fact, those programs make me want to puke all over your new Abercrombie shirt.....Now you're short a hundred bucks. ....Boo Hoo.I don't care if you think your cock is bigger than mine....I'm italian. Mine is bigger and better than yours....I don't care if you think you're smarter than me....I'm smarter than you....I don't care if you read this and dislike me......I probably don't like you either......100%

My Interests

God, Guitars, drums, yelling at old people, sound waves, charge, polarity, metaphysics, religion, philosophy, astronomy, shaolin kung fu, using my imagination, cheesy horror movies, anatomy, weight lifting, picking my nose and feeding my snot to you, orange soda, shaving helpless little animals bald, snakes, lizards, playing with bile, drinking battery acid, chemistry, history, pre-19th century native american culture, brewing my own fucking beer, and telling your sister that i'd knock the dust off her and do her raw.

I'd like to meet:

Jesus Lucifer, Christopher Walken, Spawn, other clairvoyant people, and anyone who watches Laguna Beach or The Real World so I can grab them by their hollow little heads and stuff my dick in their faces.

Music:

Ok, here we go.... Meshuggah, Fear Factory Chimaira, Mudvayne, Dimmu Borgir , Pantera Damageplan, Hatebreed, Soulfly, Sepultura, Devildriver Dream Theater, Symphony X Shadows Fall , Killswitch Engage, Metallica (pre-Bob Rock) White Zombie, Rob Zombie, Pearl Jam, Alice in Chains, Tricky, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Dying Fetus, The Sever Display, Disgorge (CA & MEX), Arch Enemy Cryptopsy, Immolation, Last Days of Humanity, Slipknot, Lamb of God , Burn the Priest, Extol, Bleeding Through, Slayer, Anal Cunt, The Agony Scene, Despised Icon, David Arkenstone, Seal, Coldplay, Sting, Mushroomhead, Ventana, Poison the Well, Sade, Enigma, Machinehead, Jungle Rot, A Dozen Furies, Redshift, Drowning Pool, Bob Seger, Mastadon, 2 Live Crew, Outkast, Outback, Phil Collins, Pink Floyd, Black Sabbath, Nine Inch Nails, Otep, Opeth Rammstein, Susperia, Samael, Sprung Monkey, Stabbing Westward, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Taproot, Ill Nino, Lenny Kravitz, Juno Reactor, In Flames, Incubus, Violent Work of Art, Nothingface, Faith No More, Flaw, Jerry Cantrell, Dieselboy, Aphex Twin, Skinny Puppy, Danzig Dry Kill Logic, Duran Duran, Guns N Roses, Bon Jovi, Van Halen, Boards of Canada, Death, Corrosion of Conformity, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, Cherry Poppin Daddies, Royal Crown Review, Evilution, Scar Symmetry As I Lay Dying, Korn (first 2), KMFDM, The Haunted

Movies:

cheesy horror movies, lord of the rings, star wars, matrix, strangeland, ...you know what? who cares.

Television:

almost never.. but if my roomdogs are watching it, i'll change it to the History Channel, Comedy Central, or Spike TV if it's UFC night.

Books:

Lord of the Rings, Dragonlance, Piers Anthony (apprentice adept series), Terry Brooks (shannara saga), Terry Goodkind, Aristotle's The Metaphysics, Steven Hawking's A Brief History of Time/A Brief History of Everything, Raymond Feist's Riftwar/Serpentwar Sagas, Lord of the Flies, and Mark Z. Danielewski's House of Leaves.

Heroes:

Christopher Walken Albert Einstein Carl Orff Spawn Nero Dimebag Darrell Joe Satriani James Hetfield Kirk Hammett John Petrucci Max Cavalera Dez Fafara Mitch Hedberg Steven Hawking

My Blog

The Serpents Road

"The Serpent's Road" OneOne for the roadWhere I am is never where I goSo give me one for the roadTwoTwo times I triedThat makes two times you cried liesSo give me one for the roadThe serpent waits for...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Wed, 23 Apr 2008 02:48:00 PST

A Broken Mind

"A Broken Mind" I’ve been such a foolWrapped in a liar’s embraceI knew there was something wrongYou just had to save your pretty faceI tried for so longTo be there, to show you howBut this...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Mon, 07 Apr 2008 08:34:00 PST

A Creep of Winter

"A Creep of Winter" So cold and dark, I know that I’m aloneIn this lonely zone I can’t phone homeIs it test or trial so they can find outIf I’ll hurt myself or rip my mind out?They p...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Thu, 06 Dec 2007 02:40:00 PST

Global Warming?? HA!!! Global BULLSHIT.

To all of you who are scared and freaking out about this global warming crap... Here is my humble opinion. It's caused by solar activity you fucking dumbass. The sun has (on average) a 20 year s...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 08:13:00 PST

My review of the Metal for the Masses V DVD

MY REVIEW OF THE "METAL FOR THE MASSES V" DVD SUMMARY:While there are a few bands I would have omitted, most of them kick fucking ass. So go get the god damn set. 8 bucks for 2 cds and 1 dvd. Deffinat...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Wed, 21 Nov 2007 11:30:00 PST

Honesty & Trust, Lies & Doubt... How do YOU treat YOUR love?

I've had lots of relationship experience and if there is one lesson I learned over the years that stands taller than all others, it is that you should never EVER lie. No matter what. Even if it s...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Fri, 16 Nov 2007 01:40:00 PST

Women, Alcohol, and the health of your wang.

I think too many girls will claim a "black out" after a long night of drinking to try to eliminate any responsibility they have for their actions in a feeble attempt to keep us guys from jud...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Mon, 16 Apr 2007 12:56:00 PST

Death of a Prostitute (she saw it cumming)

"Death of a Prostitute (she saw it cumming)"Spread your legs and bleed for himYou dirty little bitchCrawl to the corner and shut the fuck upWhile he binds you with chainsSmile and look prettyIt's...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Sat, 27 Jan 2007 04:30:00 PST

Maya's Suffering

"Maya's Suffering"She came to me to observeTo find a grain of hopeFor her hideous faceAs she looks into meHer weeping is steadyHer heart is emptyHopelessShe shaves her head in agonyClaws her cheeks fr...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Fri, 26 Jan 2007 05:51:00 PST

Clockwork

"Clockwork"The raven caws another timeDammit, boy, you fucked up againDo it over and do it well this timeFix your wrongs and die once moreSo the world can remain with laughterDon't try to hideYou know...
Posted by DEVIL DAVE on Fri, 05 May 2006 02:34:00 PST