Matthew profile picture

Matthew

in my day we called tugboats THE BIG MUSCLES BOATS

About Me

Maxie got aresztowany for pouring wiejska kielbasa into the kanalizowac.

My Interests

Dina, fishing, old things, cats, dogs, dinosaurs, st. frankenstein's cake, the great war, my family, old new york, delicious snacks, reading, apologizing, annoying people, balloon races, pet parades, NPR, hot dogs, bike-riding, sunshine, tall cold ones, snacks, job hunting.

I'd like to meet:

owls. how come i ain't never seem them

Music:

Wire, Hausmeister, Jay Reatard, Television, X-Ray Spex, Pet Shop Boys, garage compilations, Thee Headcoats, The Makers, The Kinks, Beach Boys, Nina Hagen, The Oblivians, Chocolate Watchband, Jason Forest, LCD Soundsystem, DC Snipers

Books:

George Orwell, Christopher Hitchens, Robert Graves, George Saunders, Saul Bellow, Phillip Roth, Issaic Deutscher, Rebecca West, Dorothy Parker, Roald Dahl, PG Wodehouse, Rabelais, Cervantes

Heroes:

mom and pop

My Blog

Letters to the NYC MTA

So I get these ideas, right? These comedy ideas. For awhile I was vandalizing Wikipedia. Now my project is writing fake letters that would be sent to large companies or organizations, and the letters ...
Posted by Matthew on Sat, 24 Mar 2007 12:00:00 PST

My wave of crime is over.

Innocently enough it started with poking fun at Ashlee Simpson, who in her early-ish days had a faux punk rock image, what with her converse all-stars and all. I edited wikipedia to indicate that her ...
Posted by Matthew on Mon, 05 Mar 2007 04:46:00 PST

the big one that got away

I went fishin'! it was fun. I put a sign on my door that said "Gone Fishin'" so I could roll like that. I met up with Jessica and her BF Patrick at Hudson River Park at Houston Street and we walked do...
Posted by Matthew on Mon, 21 Aug 2006 04:16:00 PST

TV Listings

Dina and I got cable last weekend, and it turns out that there are about three tv shows worth watching, ever, and none of them are on.(I've been working on this for awhile...) 07:00 pm07:30 pm08:...
Posted by Matthew on Mon, 13 Feb 2006 09:13:00 PST