BarCode - Your Pocket Decoder to the Modern Dating Scene by Stephanie Naman, Wendy Tatum and Ian David. Published by Conari Press. Click here to find out more.
BarCode - Your Pocket Decoder to the Modern Dating Scene by Stephanie Naman, Wendy Tatum and Ian David. Published by Conari Press. Click here to find out more.
BARCODE by Stephanie Naman, Wendy Tatum and Ian David.Have the antics of your over-affectionate, cocktail-crazed alter ego ever left you too embarrassed for words? Does recounting your fashion foibles occasionally leave you tongue-tied? Have the cruel parting shots of a former lover ever left you speechless?Not anymore.Now there’s BarCode, an irreverent glossary of words, definitions and etymologies that perfectly articulates the ups and downs of dating. Single and looking? Single and not looking? Involved and committed? Involved and not committed? Married and want to look back and laugh at your single days, or even better, your single friends? BarCode is your personal pocket decoder to all the hilarious bliss and blunders of the modern dating scene.
CATCH THE 'CODER LIVE ON TV! That's right, we're slated to make an appearance on 'GOOD DAY ALABAMA' on Thursday, December 29 @ 7:50 am. It's going to be fun so be sure to tune in.
SHALAMAR ..shal•a•mar.. n.: White man’s dancing. Utterly hopeless. As the strains of Brick House fill the crowded hall, a cold sweat cascades down Greg’s back. Sure enough, Laura is on him in a flash. And so it is that once again Greg is dragged against his will onto a dance floor teeming with poor saps like himself. In a complete state of panic, he does the only thing he can. He falls into the shalamar.White men can’t jump and they sure as hell can’t dance. But they can, on occasion, muster a passable shalamar, the first and only resort for the terminally uncoordinated. Based on a pop/funk combo from the early eighties disco era, the shalamar is your basic starter-pack dance move and goes something like this: One to the left. (Boom. Boom.) One to the right. (Boom. Boom.) And so on and so on. It’s nice to throw a furrowed brow into the mix for a touch of earnestness. But nevertheless, it’s all a very, very long way from Saturday Night Fever. All together now: “Ha-ha-ha-ha.†(An Extract from BARCODE)
CHICK-COMS..chik•coms.. n.: The shows you religiously watch with your girlfriend, but adamantly deny knowing anything about in the presence of your male friends.***“I know. I can’t wait,†Bill whispers into his phone at work. “Not since Melrose have I been this excited about T.V. I mean, Sex and the City reruns got us through the rough times without prime-time chick coms, but without Desperate Housewives, I can’t think of a reason we even need a T.V….uh hum, what’s up guys? Honey, gotta go. Tom and Bob just walked in. (An Extract from BARCODE)
BARCODE Your Personal Pocket Decoder to the Modern Dating Scene by Stephanie Naman, Wendy Tatum and Ian David. Published by Conari Press. October 2006. Available now @ amazon.com. and all good bookstores.
X-MEN ..X min.. n.: Her ex-lovers. Possessing an almost super-human ability to mess with your head***“I love you for who you are,†she says sweetly. But inevitably her thoughts turn to one of her x-men. “Though you could maybe work on those abs. Rick had great abs.â€The thing about X-Men is that they really do seem to be super-heroes: Brad had been the captain of the football team at college; Joey is a human rights attorney; and Rick, to hear her tell it, was cut like Brad Pitt in Troy. The key to all this is acceptance. Let John the jogger mutate into the winner of last year’s New York Marathon. That’s fine; you’re okay with that. When she senses you don’t give a damn about her x-men they’ll quickly lose their superpowers. It’s either that or you learn to leap tall buildings in a single bound. (An Extract from BARCODE)