Planet - ProfilesArchive

About Me

"
Life is far too short. Therefore, I keep moving. There are a lot of things on earth that I love. I love to hump...people, couches, tour buses...I hump in your general direction. I have a cat that humps the hell out of a Scooby Doo plush doll. My other cat doesn't hump but he's in love with shoes, trash and knows how to sit on command like a dog. I love to make people laugh. On their worst day its my favorite thing to be there and run around with a coconut bra and bullhorn in the rain if that will make them smile.
I love kissing people with no entanglements or attachments other than the moment. Lose that last bit of shame, have no regrets, love who you are, even when you hate yourself.
I love being alone. I love being covered in people. I love that tingly feeling when the person you were waiting for is late and then they show up. That relief. And yet I can't stand when people are habitually late. I want a giant dog that I can name Smidgen. I was brought up by two older brothers through repeated ass kickings. My dad could kick your dad's ass. Actually, my mom could kick your dad's ass, but that's a whole other subject.

I love writing. I love acting. I love singing, poorly and really loudly. I like singing well and very quietly. I love dressing up and looking to see who's looking. I love catfish tacos. I love a giant steak. I love bar food. I love beer. I like watching football, basketball, baseball, soccer, hockey...I love a good pile on. One day I will have money and not know what to do with it.
I live in NYC and try to fit in as much life as I can into the smallest amount of time. Don't sleep much, there will be plenty time for that when I've finally turned to ash. Which will be soon since I am the whitest person on earth. Vampire in training. Travel as much as I can afford, to see friends that I love all over the country, moved around a lot although now I think that I'm stuck with NYC at least for a stretch. Don't think I can leave this life if I tried. Only time will tell but its hard to even concentrate without all the noise and madness around you. I've been told I was "mad toast"...please enlighten me if you can.I'm my father's daughter in my mother's body.
And my favorite word is assclown.

People like this are my friends...AND I LOVE IT!
You Are Animal
A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts.
You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary.
But you sure can beat a good drum.
"Kill! Kill!" The Muppet Personality Test

My Interests

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Writing plays/poems/books, Acting, Singing in the shower, PR, boys, girls, bald heads (le purr), tattoos (le purrr), piercing (le purrr), strong arms (le purrrr), boy neck (le meow), making sure everyone else has a good time and gets home in one piece, nodding and smiling, kissing everyone, suprising people, scaring people, taking care of people, feeding the masses, feeding the masses while wearing no pants, losing my pants (Don't you hate pants?), falling asleep on monuments, deep sea fishing, being on a boat, catfish fishing with coolers of beer, taunting wild animals, throwing parties, drinking, FOG MACHINES, travelling, being drawn on in Sharpie marker, getting tattoos,MUSIC!!!, making people's day, taking karate to learn how to kick people's asses, making people laugh so hard they either wet or snot themselves or spit out their beer and various other silly things.

SOFTBALL! My babies, the Vikings who I co-manage:

If you have any goodness left in you, go to Impetuous Theater

NINJAS! PIRATES! VIKINGS! WEREWOLVES! VAMPIRES! OH MY!

Shooting shit and friends

Oh yeah, and I take a lot of pictures.

BUS HUMPING!!! That's the Jager bus...

Spending as much time as possible with crazy friends:

When I was little I wanted to be Julie Andrews:

Or Miss Piggy

Now I don't know what I want to be when I grow up...

But I'll always take your picture and make you look good:

And I am developing a bizarre love for pirates:

I'd like to meet:

Anyone who can keep me on my toes and challenge me. Anyone who uses assclown in a sentence around corporate executives.

Anyone who likes the Big Lebowski and can quote it.

Anyone who eats Ranch dressing on everything.

More crazy fuckers like these guys:

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If you like being entertained, go to ImpetuousTheater.com

Anyone who enjoys more cowbell:

"Don't you hate pants?" (Homer Simpson)

Music:

I was raised on German Polka, Irish Drinking Songs, Kenny Rogers, Peter, Paul & Mary, The master Harry Belafonte and early big band so anything that makes my imagination go no matter what genre. My all time favorite song is "Every little thing she does is magic." despite an odd situation that introduced me to it. I still can't live without Smashing Pumpkins and Ozzy. My mom and I painted our porch in Georgia to Stone Temple Pilots one summer. There are two many for me to list and I'm going to play it safe and not list them here. There is music in heaven or nirvana...

Movies:

Top Secret!, Airplane, The Big Lebowski, Princess Bride, The Jerk, Gross Pointe Blank, Blade, Anything 80's Molly Ringwald, Anything Kevin Smith (Jay & Silent Bob Kevin Smith), Star Wars, The Die Hards...I feel there is a very basic equation to make a film enjoyable:

Stuff blowing up plus guns plus funnies plus lots of swearing plus more funnies.

Television:

THE MUPPETS!

I am never home and always writing so TV I neglect unless someone else turns it on...that's when life suckage occurs when the mysterious box manages to disappear hours of your precious life. If I do want to promote brain rot, I watch A&E shows like Cold Case Files and American Justice, Spike TV for CSI Vegas, TNT for Law & Order...notice the pattern, I like shows about crimes and murder. When that doesn't do it for me I laugh my ass off at Adult Swim...the staples like Family Guy of course, but the weirder ones are really funny...

Books:

So many, so little time. Hitchhiker's Guide, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Elmore Leonard, Bridget Jones, Where the Wild Things Are...I spend all my time writing these days I have been an awful slacker on my reading pile. I love love love Harpers though.

Heroes:

Lewis the cat:

"His M.O. is to spring from behind you and what he does is wrap himself around your legs and he bites and scratches," Janet Kettman said.

"The neighbors said those weapons, along with catlike stealth, have allowed Lewis to attack at least a half dozen people and ambush the Avon lady as she was getting out of her car."

My Blog

8 blocks of cheese, 8 magnums of wine and 12 drunk English Elviseseses

What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. *Edited* pics to follow...I will say that Quark's Exclabrian Enchiladas were awesome. On a jet plane this afternoon headed back to the homestead. ...
Posted by Planet on Mon, 22 Oct 2007 09:34:00 PST

Going back to Los Angeles and various other travels in future

And away she goes again. That's right. More trips are booked. Los Angeles, Vegas, Miami and....Iowa. That's right, beautiful downtown Iowa. The only thing I can say is 1....
Posted by Planet on Thu, 13 Sep 2007 02:53:00 PST

May I help you?

So this blog was supposed to be about how I am disappointed women worldwide....which I will return to but....BEFORE that the most BIZZARE thing just happened. Another hotel fantabulous horror st...
Posted by Planet on Fri, 17 Aug 2007 04:24:00 PST

The roof! The roof!

Yes, I went there. Last night, or I suppose technically this morning at 2 AM the fire alarm in my hotel went off and we all had to evacuate. I realized that if there were any real emergency that...
Posted by Planet on Thu, 16 Aug 2007 01:37:00 PST

Two old foreign people just tried to bust into my room

They weren't speaking a romance language from what I could tell, so I locked to door. They went away. Watch out for the foreign blue hairs, they will take your balls off and steal your und...
Posted by Planet on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 10:07:00 PST

Pooping sounds different in Europe

You always forget how different pooping sounds in Europe due to the low water toilets. It sounds like you just gave birth to a watermelon and instead all that work is for nothing but an average,...
Posted by Planet on Tue, 14 Aug 2007 06:55:00 PST

Adventures in life - Summer 2007 blog

Ah the summer has started off well, first with Tim going up and going better than I could have expected. My job has accelerated but it's still good. My students grades are getting better a...
Posted by Planet on Mon, 02 Jul 2007 06:04:00 PST

The top friends conundrum

So once in a while I think of something that I can worry about that is absolutely inconsequential and means very little to real life. I guess it's because I hate reality TV or the fact that I ra...
Posted by Planet on Thu, 21 Jun 2007 10:47:00 PST

A bedtime wish for Mr. Hopkins

Imagine you were 24. And then imagine it were over. That's it. Sorry - hey - that's all you get. That happened Sunday morning to someone I barely knew for two years playing sof...
Posted by Planet on Tue, 12 Jun 2007 11:04:00 PST

Running down a dream...

So I have basically neglected blogging since hmmm...St Patrick's Day. Things have been on the ridiculous side of busy and tumultuous and crazy. If sane is to the right, then I have been li...
Posted by Planet on Sun, 10 Jun 2007 04:55:00 PST