. I am not always on here daily and frequently take quite a while to reply to messages.. Thank you for your patience and understanding! I can only do what I feel up to at the time.
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.About Sending Friend Requests - I'D REALLY APPRECIATE GETTING A MESSAGE ALONG WITH THE REQUEST.. OR I MAY NOT EVEN GET TO YOURS.. thanks :)
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THESE ARE ALL OF MY .. PROFILES...ANYTHING ELSE IS A FAKE!
I am NOT on VampireFreaks.com or ANY Dating Sites!
:My DeviantArt Profile:.......
http://buttercups84.deviantart.com
Morbid Beauties Profile:.....
http://www.morbidbeauties.com/index.php?Enigma%20RoseMy Model Mayhem Profile:.......
http://www.modelmayhem.com/anenigmaunleashed
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..(Random Meaningful Lyrics)..
"The world is just illusion.. trying to change you"
"Sweet Josephine never sleeps"
"The journey seems endless.. but I'll carry on"
"The heart may freeze, or it can burn..The pain will ease.. if I can learn.. there is no future, there is no past..."
"little angel ....tries to make it all worth while"
"Though the past, the unwanted memories, are holding onto you... All the power in the Universe, conspires to carry you"
"I will wait for you... endlessly"
"May I become your wings"
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I have many major health problems.. ...Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, Chronic Myofascial Pain, Mycoplasma(possibly gone), Severe gait disturbance, Multiple Chemical Sensitivity, Allergic to a chemical in black dyes(in clothing, makeup, oils, gasoline, hair dyes, etc) Orthostatic Hypotension, possibly Hypoglycemia, Anemia, Lymes Disease, and I am usually fighting off more minor viruses as well. I also have major & minor depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
I'll explain much more later..
These are my main practices/treatments/therapies:
I see a Naturopathic Dr.(1x/Week) that works with Homeopathic Remedies.
I also see him as a Chiropractor about once a month
I was seeing an Occupational Therapist (3 X/Week), now only twice a month, that works with electro-acupuncture machines and Microcurrent for my pain/tightness and other symptoms, she uses Trigger Point Release Therapy and Cranio-Sacral Therapy also.. as well as other techniques.
I take Glyconutritional Supplements (up to 3x/Day) through Mannatech.
And other supplements
I work with meditation/relaxation techniques; Reiki, Reflexology, and other healing techniques.
I practice conscious gratitude, letting go, and non-attachment.. as well as many other positive lifestyle changes. I try to eat as health-conscious as I can. I'm on a high salt intake diet for my low blood pressure & Autonomic Dysfunction. I use an Ionic Footbath every few days, currently.
I am prescribed an Alpha Stim 100(cranial electro-therapy device) for depression, anxiety, insomnia, & pain.(Its a god-send).. I use this daily for at least 2 hours (its currently away being repaired).
I must spend at least 80% of my day resting, stretching, and just enjoying a peaceful environment.
I'm 23 and I've been dealing with major health issues since 1999, living at home with my mom as a dependant adult, unable to work or school, though I'm definitely on the road to recovery, it's a slow process with many ups, downs, and let downs, but with Much progress overall.. Healing isn't ever easy, quick, or mindless..it's a personal journey we all must take action in getting through. It's a major learning process, I can either fall and give up or keep going, no matter what... I'ts well worth the wait and effort for me.
If you are going to have me as a friend, know this... I am going through a lot of health problems..you cannot fix me and me hearing you wish you could doesn't really help me, this is my own journey and I must go through it.. you will hear what I go through daily, sometimes it sounds ugly, sometimes it sounds as if I'm doing Much better (it's a rollercoaster) and the best you can do is be there for me.. I appreciate any prayers or thoughtful gestures, kind words, etc.. I'm sorry if I sound really depressed at times.. I can be, but it isn't forever.. this isn't forever.. and if you stick around for the future, you will see a new, more happy and healthy me.
Most of my blogs are more for myself, or more of an inspiration to others that may deal with something similar.. it's a record of me healing.. and growing.. I've already come a long way.
It's hard for me to meet new people because I have to put forth more energy to get to know them, talk about myself, get comfortable with them.. so, many days I must stick to talking with my closest friends..(some days I can't even talk to them) I love to meet new people though, it just takes a while to really connect with me sometimes.
My main goal is to get well... so I can help others a lot more and pursue my dreams as well.
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. My main interests are:
Horses (riding, training, showing, competition, communication, psychology)
Modeling/Acting/Photography
Singing
Alternative Health and Healing
Making Jewelry, Accessories, Model Horse Blankets/Accessories, Unique Gift Cards
Creative Writing
Helping Others
Learning ways to help myself and others
My mom and I have two horses.. my old show quarterhorse gelding and a younger paint/quarterhorse gelding.. I hope to start getting back into horse related activities soon.
I am learning all I can about modeling and photography while I'm still at home because I plan to give modeling a try and possibly photography or acting as well. Many of my pictures are just creative shoots to see what I can do with different types of modeling/poses/photography (all of my pics are taken by me, so far) I will be working with different photographers, as my health allows, to gain experience, and start building a portfolio.. I may start contacting some agencies as well (when I can). I do not want to limit my work to more "gothic" styles and shoots.. I'm open to more mainstream looks as well. My own personal style changes as well, I never limit myself to one look, though I completely adore many of the gothic types of fashions(as you can tell). I love creating beautiful, creative, almost surreal, images that reflect my inspirations and the beauty I see in this world. I've never used Photoshop.
I used to always be in choir in school, usually a First Soprano, I have lost much of my singing ability with my health problems causing complications, but I've never given up and it's slowly coming back as my health is improving... I may continue working on my own "music" projects or consider joining a band at some point... I'm not sure yet. I love to sing though I have a bit of stage fright.
I'm learning a lot about alternative healthcare (through my own health battles) and different types of treatments, and the field interests me as well, especially different types of healers, energy work, and alt. therapies.. possibly even working with animals.
I feel odd because I had to learn these things due to my severe health complications and can't talk about it with just anyone because not everyone Needs to or wants to learn these things (it's a whole new way of living/knowing).. that limits my conversation greatly at times and it makes me look odd to some.
I've started creating some of my own designs for jewelry and accessories, as well as model horse blankets/accessories, and I've come up with an interesting gift card making style that I may continue working with.
I've almost always written poetry, and done very well in English/Creative Writing classes, so I'm going to continue and see where it takes me.
I'm one to always try to help anyone I can.. everyone struggles with many things in life and if I can help in any way, I usually at least try.. I always used to think I'd become a counselor, now I'm not sure.. but I will continue to help others when I can.. I have a feeling now I'll be helping others more with health issues.
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