Benjamin David Chadwick profile picture

Benjamin David Chadwick

Give me a dollar and I will spend it for you.

About Me

I intentionally uploaded that photo so that it wouldn't be blatantly, obvious that I'm cock-eyed. (don't stare too long...you'll get pregnant!) Also I drive a 1974 Chevy, "ChildMolester" model, Van...it's all decked out with dingle-balls and a "Back the Badge" sticker on the back that repels police officers. Yeah, they stopped making that model around '76......Now, to all the animal lovers out there, I hate to admit it...but I have a genuine bald eagle, neck-leather steering wheel with a Spotted White Owl-head, shifter knob. My car comes with the Koala-skin seat covers and some near-extinct, sea turtle rims. The blinker switch is made from the finest bald eagle feet with talons (one of fiftysix eagles shot to decorate my car) The dashboard is made of pure, dried killer whale skin. And finally, in order to put the finishing touches on, I've had two baby elephant tusks mounted onto the hood...one of which is impailing a fawn. And when I get to my favorite restaurant, I order the baby seal...clubbed, hold the eyes.-Just kidding...I think all those animals are neat!

My Interests

Well I hate music...I'm just in it for the chicks. I hate chicks too.

I'd like to meet:

Somebody REALLY boring. If there's anything I hate...it's a personality. I prefer people who just stare blankly or, better yet, I'd like to meet a dead guy or girl. Sex isn't an issue I'll take whatever dead shit you wanna give me. I also want to meet a really nice mail-man...one who's not afraid to open up to me and just share his feelings. I mean, why can't they do that? My mail-man won't even come in for breakfast. I want a mail-man who'll watch re-runs of M.A.S.H., with me until the cows come home. Hey, you know what? I want to meet someone whose cows came home too...and maybe a knuckle sandwich...I've always wanted to meet a knuckle sandwich...I'd kiss it on the LIPS!!

Music:

I make my own music...so I don't like anything else because I'm conceited. Well okay, I like Korn, Megadeth, Cannibal Corpse, Slipknot...basically anything that sucks. I can't listen to any band that does not have "image"...music was founded on image. There would be no music whatsoever if Mozart hadn't worn assless leather chaps. (New Maximumdonkey)

Movies:

Casino, The Pianist, Robocop, Jackie Brown, The Jacket.

Television:

Court TV...otherwise F@$% Television. .. width="425" height="350" ..

Books:

Helter Skelter, Harry Potter, Call of the Wild, Musician's Friend, Readers Digest.

Heroes:

Paul McCartney, Kurt Cobain, Chris Ballew, Brian Wilson, Flaming Lips, Your Mom. People who grow their hair out and try to sound like Beck. The Beatles...C'mon...if you don't like the Beatles you're an elitist trying to impress other elitists. Elitists can't be impressed so just give in. I feel the conflict within you, let go of your hate. You can hate the Beatles as long as you don't like ANYTHING else.

My Blog

Well, It's been awhile...hasn't it?

   I'm a sensitive person.  Every year, I get more so. I'll bet it's easy to assume that I have no fear or that I just get up and do what I do without any sign of inhibition. ...
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Mon, 11 Jun 2007 12:56:00 PST

Me...all about ME!

I'm glad to be home where the buffalo...don't exactly rome...but the deer and the antelope are scarcely seen.  Everyone who has showed me and my colleagues support over the years is to be thanked...
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Thu, 25 May 2006 02:46:00 PST

People who...

...need to PROVE to me that they lack a sense of humor, are a bizarre breed.  I write a joke letter to all of my friends on the New Maximumdonkey page and one guy, out of the 700+ people who...
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Sat, 19 Nov 2005 01:41:00 PST

PUNK ROCK POSER CITY!

I have to say that I'm pretty tired of punk rock, fashion show winners.  Especially ones who wind up at my shows and think they're teaching me something new with their innovative middle fing...
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Wed, 16 Nov 2005 08:53:00 PST

Maybe it's my guns..who knows?

My computer popularity is at it's peak....why am I so cool? Is it my shorts?
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Benny

What the hell is a BLOG? Shit...it ain't easy being retarded!
Posted by Benjamin David Chadwick on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST