Geoff

I'd like to meet:

For very different reasons in order of length...

Morrissey
Elvis Presley
John Darnielle
Ricky Gervais
Stephen Merchant
Karl Pilkington
Cary Grant
Brian Wilson
Gene Kelly
Wes Anderson
Jack Black
Gene Wilder
Simon Pegg
Steve Coogan
Trey Parker
Fred Willard
George Clooney
John Belushi
Ian Curtis
Robert Downey Jr.
Burt Bacharach
Mil Millington
John Goodman
The Coen Brothers
Petula Clark
Roky Erickson
Jarvis Cocker
Wes Anderson
Shane Warne
John Fogerty
Tony Martin
Ringo Starr
Goran Ivanisevic
William Shatner
Frank Sinatra
Isaac Brock
Mitch Hedberg
Dionne Warwick
Zinedine Zidane
Tom Verlaine
Paul Simon
Katrina Leskanich
Luis Guzman
Patti Smith
John Cleese
Linda Cardellini
Tom Hanks
John Clarke
Van Morrison
Mick Jagger
Tony Wilson
Paul McCartney
Charlie Kaufman
Steven Page
JosÃ© Miguel Contreras
Beck
Dusty Springfield
Michelle Pfeiffer
Dylan Moran
Chuck Berry
Tony Burrows
Nicholas Thorburn
Graham Linehan
Peter Baynham
Freddie Mercury
Bob Dylan
Michael J. Fox
Chris Morris
Lou Reed
Joey Ramone
Steve Martin
Johnny Rotten
Richard E. Grant
Jim Carrey
Jason Statham
Bill Murray
Bruce Springsteen
John Wayne Gacy Jr.
Tom DeLaughter
Owen Wilson
Tony Visconti
Kevin Rowlands
Pete Shelley
Ross Noble
Ralf HÃ¼tter
Carl Weathers
Ronnie Tutt
David Byrne
Charlie Hodge
Tim Burton
Meat Loaf
Shaun Micallef
Robert Smith
Sean Connery
Ed Kavalee
Julie Andrews
Humphrey Bogart
Mel Brooks
Dustin Hoffman
Orson Welles
Seth MacFarlane
Kylie Minogue
Samm Levine
Tim Robbins
Bobby Darin
John Cusack
Audrey Hepburn
Iggy Pop
Noel Gallagher
Dean Martin
Roy Orbison
Aretha Franklin
Stephen Fry
Shaun Ryder
Matt Groening
Jemaine Clement
Ethan Suplee
Martin Freeman
Guy Ritchie
Nena
John Turturro
Chris Martin
Rod Stewart
Lavinia Nixon
Julia Davis
Dolly Parton
Santo Cilauro
Ray Davies
Fred Schneider
Amy Sedaris
Spike Jonze
Hugh Grant
Harrison Ford
Hugh Laurie
Rachel Weisz
Craig Ferguson
Ron Livingston
Larry David
Nick Drake
Johnny Depp
Mike Love
Marvin Gaye
Jon Stewart
Rowan Atkinson
Marty Sheargold
Kevin Smith
Brad Pitt
Marc Bolan
Sufjan Stevens
Kevin Spacey
Kate Winslet
Jerry Seinfeld
Debbie Harry
Lee Mack
Mama Cass
Jackie Chan
Guy Garvey
Mackenzie Crook
David Hyde Pierce
Nathan Lane
Joe Dolce
Joe Cocker
Lou Costello
Sylvester Stallone
Michael Winterbottom
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Joe Strummer
Morten Harket
Dan Aykroyd
David Bowie
Dooley Wilson
Richie Benaud
Stevie Wonder
Cat Stevens
Little Richard
John Kay
Zero Mostel
Whoopi Goldberg
Conan O'Brien
Nico
Devendra Banhart
Charmian Carr
Kirsten Dunst
Stuart Murdoch
John Safran
BjÃ¶rk
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Breckin Meyer
Paul Walker
Ray Charles
Billy Crystal
Ian Brown
Bill Haley
Ed Robertson
Marisa Tomei
Neil Diamond
Matt Damon
Paul Butler
Craig Finn
Michael Stipe
Julia Roberts
Jim Henson
Regis Philbin
Natalie Portman
Father Bob
Michael Parkinson
Buddy Holly
Patience Hodgsen
Robert de Niro
Siouxsie Sioux
Rik Mayall
Cameron Bird
Bret McKenzie
Ben Elton
Ennio Morricone
Hugh Hefner
Claude Reins
Jack White
Julie Andrews
Billie Joe Armstrong
Jeff Mangum
Adam Sandler
Sammy Davis Jr.
Adam West
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Al Gore
Bobby Day
Owen Wilson
Christopher Guest
Jennifer Hawkins
Ewan McGregor
Burgess Meredith
Jesse Michaels
Kelsey Grammer
Bill Bailey
Boz Boorer
Keanu Reeves
Louis Armstrong
Frank Black
Jack Nicholson
Annette Bening
Gwyneth Paltrow
Bruce Willis
Jeff Stilson
Eazy-E
Jeff Lynne
Sir Bob Geldof
Morgan Freeman
Rivers Cuomo
Chubby Checker
Keith Richards
Seth Rogen
Nick Frost
James Franco
Sigourney Weaver
Donald Trump
Ben Folds
Kevin Costner
Carl Perkins
Wayne Coyne
Bon Scott
Elton John
Andy Warhol
Fats Domino
Richard Nixon
Chevy Chase
Steve Mason
Bill Nighy
Steve Carell
Romeo Stodart
Keira Knightley
Henry Rollins
Mark Oliver Everett
David Johansen
Oprah Winfrey
Steve Buscemi
Vinnie Jones
David Letterman
Jenna Elfman
Red Symons
Jason Bateman
Ricki Lake
Robin Williams
Harry Connick Jr.
Robbie Williams
Paris Hilton
Stanley Kubrick
Michael Jordan
Vigilante Carlstroem
Murray Lightburn
Johnny Marr...

oh, and "Einstein, or Jesus".