Achtung!
Mr John is writing a new comedy film for Teamfunkcamp with Dan the beard. There will be another sketch video soon, featuring those pics of your dad's boobs that you loaned to me.
Why do people spam and scam? I will penisburst those that flap their pointless wares in my domain, but now, some blurb aboot me:
I am on a new fitness/health regime lately, having overdone things and it is going well, like a camel on a hoover.
For those of you unimpressed with the silly, I say this: my giggle gears got stuck in "generate tee hee" a long time ago and doesn't look like moving, however, I can be vaccinated against using the awesome power of decent conversation.
Here's an internet quiz I nicked from a wonderful friend, that reflects my geographical birthing, childish poise and all round funkstickery:
Your results:
You are Sean Connery
Sean Connery
61%
George Lazenby
58%
Roger Moore
57%
Pierce Brosnan
56%
Daniel Craig
47%
Timothy Dalton
41%
The original actor to play James Bond in a movie is generally regarded as the best. Sean Connery has always been the epitome of sexiness, suaveness and sophistication.
Click here to take the "Which James Bond am I?" quiz...
Here's another one:
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Mr John
Birthday: 23rd Feb 1977
Birthplace: Aberdeen
Current Location: Sofa
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Brown
Height: 6 ft 5
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: My what? EARTHLING
The Shoes You Wore Today: old crappy DCs
Your Weakness: telling people what my weakness is
Your Fears: Bolton
Your Perfect Pizza: pepperoni
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: World Domination
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Is this thing on?
Thoughts First Waking Up: Sartre was wrong
Your Best Physical Feature: my soul. Oh PHYSICAL, I saw "metaphysical"
Your Bedtime: depends on time zone
Your Most Missed Memory: chatting with dad
Pepsi or Coke: can't tell, could be onion soup for all I know
MacDonalds or Burger King: neither
Single or Group Dates: both
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: all three
Cappuccino or Coffee: either
Do you Smoke: no, hate it
Do you Swear: uh huh
Do you Sing: yup
Do you Shower Daily: I shower dairy.
Have you Been in Love: possible
Do you want to go to College: been
Do you want to get Married: hmm, would he?
Do you belive in yourself: I believe in nothing but it is my nothing.
Do you get Motion Sickness: yes
Do you think you are Attractive: sometimes
Are you a Health Freak: a bit
Do you get along with your Parents: yes
Do you like Thunderstorms: yes, apart from that time on the Easyjet flight from Paris which got struck by lightening. I shat it.
Do you play an Instrument: Bass & keyboards, but not anymore.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yes
In the past month have you Smoked: no
In the past month have you been on Drugs: *flush* no!
In the past month have you gone on a Date: no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: shut up.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: "_____"
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: no
In the past month have you been on Stage: yes! Allo Allo, Churchill, Edinburgh
In the past month have you been Dumped: no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: no!
Ever been Drunk: aye
Ever been called a Tease: possibly, might have been drunk when this occurred
Ever been Beaten up: ha! as if.
Ever Shoplifted: yeah, I was 14.
How do you want to Die: ending a repressive regime. Or a fitness regime.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: a more manageable height.
What country would you most like to Visit: The US again.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: any
Favourite Hair Color: any
Short or Long Hair: short
Height: tallish, as close as possible to me!
Weight: I like my men to have presence.
Best Clothing Style: Suits. Or smart casual/relaxed
Number of Drugs I have taken: Uh oh. (Checks fingers) 7 - loooong time ago
Number of CDs I own: CDs? Pfft. 3500 mp3s.
Number of Piercings: none, had eyebrow done at 16 though
Number of Tattoos: none
Number of things in my Past I Regret: nothing - I am who I am because of what is done or not done.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
