And....
now im a dildo.
I'm a cancer
because aparently oral sex gives you cancer.... but that's good, cause i'm a dildo, and if you feel the need to suck on me and possibly swallow your own vaginal/anal juices, you need a bit more than my services
anyway, now that that's established, i was born in a small manufacturing plant in Idaho. My father was a potatoe. yea. we don't know who my mother was since us dildos are kinda like horsefish... thats not what they're called.... SEAHORSES! yea, you try having a plastic brain.
anyway, i was born a wee little dildo *insert asian joke here* but over the years I have progressed and am now more able to fulfill your needs. and by needs, i mean sex.
I have 11.5 stds. and I'm in love with a boy named will. and by boy, i mean computer/rapist. his last name contains the word butt and tit. Does that excite you? Well, that's what i'm here for.
no really, it is.
well, my name is rachel. Imagine a talking dildo.... no really think about it. it'd be all like HEY VAGINA! and ITS DARK IN HERE! HELP IM AFRAID OF THE DARK and "nowi want tunafish...."
_
so, if speaking to me whilest i am inserted into a vagina is too creepy, and-cum-or not an option, you can IM me on oXcolonychicaXo or DiiLdOdReAmZ.
HAHAHA I'm A DILDO AND I SAID CUM!!!
well, after i grew older, I moved away from Idaho, to Massachusetts. no really
iwant a cookie
It.turns.me.on.when.people.type.like.this.
there is never an appropriate time for crysterbation
ever
I always wanted to be a superhero... I mean, spiderman made it, why can't I.
once I had a spider living in my vagina...
"who is this purple-headed intruder?!"
