Rachel Ann profile picture

Rachel Ann

Can't get enough fish sandwich.

About Me

Hello, I'm Rachel. I enjoy cleaning things that haven't been cleaned in a long time. I eat stuff after I've dropped it on the floor. I can fit my entire pinky finger up my nose. I compulsively dye and cut my hair (I do it 100 times more often than I shave my legs). When someone says something funny, I replay it in my head for the next few days and frequently laugh out loud at any given moment. I sing in public. My mother died when I was eleven years old. I've saved nearly every flower that any friend, boyfriend or creep has ever given me (and now I have a collection of dead flowers in the basement of my father's house). The little toenail on my left foot is really weird-looking. I'm addicted to Forensic Files, Spider Solitaire, and eBay. I enjoy long, meaningful conversations with my dog. I like to sneeze. Does anyone actually read these things?


Myspace Layouts - Myspace Editor - Image Hosting

My Interests

These are a few of my favorite things: Music (punk, metal, girly rock, cheese rock, country, and everything rock 'n' roll), hair dye, animals, photography, tattoos, socks and stockings, zombies, sunshine, running with sharp objects, painting, making lists, keys, fashion (specifically designing and making clothes), bad jokes, tasteless humor, and lame puns, the color red, dancing (if you can call it that), books, lip balm, cheese, movies, things that vibrate, hypothetical conversations, good food, soap, bicycles, warm things, flowers, videotape, knives, nail polish, riding in cars with boys, whiskey, and laughing. Did I forget anything? Oh yeah...

I'd like to meet:

Anyone who can make me laugh. Laughing is absolutely my favorite pastime on earth-- closely followed by dancing, singing, and eating.

adopt your own virtual pet!

Music:

ROLLING STONES!!! Lunachicks, Ministry, L7, The Talking Heads, Rasputina, Tom Waits, PJ Harvey, The Clash, Patti Smith, Neutral Milk Hotel, John Prine, Bad Religion, Prince, Dead Kennedys, Johnny Cash, The Dresden Dolls, The Shooting Gallery, Little Richard, Neko Case, The Misfits, Babes in Toyland, Elvis Costello, Iggy Pop & the Stooges, Madonna, The Ramones, The Plasmatics, The Distillers, The Slits, Ani Difranco, Faith No More, Mindless Self Indulgence, B-52's, Tori Amos, Wanda Jackson, Type O Negative, The Gits, Lucid Nation, Sleater-Kinney, Chuck Berry, Sham 69, Cyndi Lauper, Catpower, Cock Sparrer, Elliot Smith, Bjork, The Melvins, Loretta Lynn, The Flaming Lips, The Left Rights, TOOL, and a whole lot more RANDOM SHIT that I can't think of right now...

Movies:

Horror movies, zombie flicks, absurd shit, hilarious dialogue, music, documentaries, sappy bittersweet crap and everything in between. Kevin Smith, Quenton Tarantino, The Eyes of Tammy Faye, The Dancing Outlaw, Lunachicks: Naked!, Ramones: End of the Century, Pantera 3, Good Will Hunting, Amelie, Margaret Cho, Repo Man, The Zero Effect, Back to the Future, Star Wars, Terminator, Aliens, The Devil's Rejects, Return of the Living Dead, George Romero (Dawn of the Dead, etc.), V for Vendetta, and Bill motherfucking Hicks!

Television:

I have cable now. For the first couple of weeks, I couldn't pull myself away from it. I spent several nights a week watching four consecutive hours of Court TV. I became really paranoid that I was gonna be brutally murdered in some fashion that would require forensic science to solve. My friends and family held an intervention... "Put the remote down and slowly back away from Forensic Files," they said. I'm better now.

Books:

1984 by George Orwell; Motherless Daughters by Hope Edelman (anyone who's lost their Mom at an early age should definitely read this); The Darkest Hour by Jay Nash (a gory encyclopedia of disasters: both natural and decidedly unnatural); The Girl's Guide to Hunting and Fishing by Melissa Banks, Trout Fishing in America by Richard Brautigan ( and other books that have the word 'fishing' in the title, but have nothing to do with fish); Tearing Down The Streets: Adventures in Urban Anarchy by Jeff Ferrell; Roget's Thesaurus; essays and poetry by Adrienne Rich; any insane ramblings by George Carlin; Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America by Barbara Ehrenreich

I just read Night Dogs by Kent Anderson. That book is gonna haunt me for years. It's an amazing fucking book.

Heroes:


Click to join FreecycleLouisville

My Blog

Something I never expected to find on Wikipedia

Something I never expected to find on Wikipedia.
Posted by Rachel Ann on Sat, 19 Apr 2008 09:05:00 PST

I quit my job!

After 9 long years at the Hardware Store, I've finally quit. I put in my two weeks, but my anus employer decided to go ahead and send me packing just three days after I wrote a "scathing" letter (in h...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Tue, 15 Apr 2008 05:39:00 PST

Herding Cats

I'm posting this so I can share it with my Dad. It's his favorite. ...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Mon, 04 Feb 2008 11:46:00 PST

I’m ready to give up on my bout of occupational feminism

A man called the Hardware Store this morning. He asked to speak to the owner or the manager by name. He had a plumbing question. This same man always wants to speak to one of these men because he beli...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Thu, 31 Jan 2008 06:28:00 PST

David Simon on The End of an American Empire

...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Sat, 26 Jan 2008 01:40:00 PST

Links to More Funny Stupid Shit

Adult SwimRobot Chicken and other totally twisted absurditiesSouth Park (all seasons!)Hours of badly animated fourths graders saying awful shit, available for our absolutely free, online viewing pleas...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Sun, 06 Jan 2008 05:39:00 PST

Dine Out, Fight AIDS. November 28th

On Wednesday, November 28th in Louisville, KY, dine out at a participating restaurant and 20% or more of your bill will be donated to House of Ruth for the support of Glade House. (If you live outside...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Tue, 13 Nov 2007 01:11:00 PST

Suck on it

Spider Solitaire: 9 minutes, 51 seconds, 286 moves (zero undo moves). I need sleep. I need a life.On a brighter note, I have kick-ass seats at the U of L game tomorrow. You don't care, I know. But I'm...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Wed, 31 Oct 2007 10:52:00 PST

The most important reason to spay and neuter

Be a responsible pet owner! Spay and neuter your pets. Have your pets properly tagged or microchiped. If you are considering a new pet, PLEASE visit petfinder.com to search for adoptable pets in your ...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Fri, 05 Oct 2007 09:22:00 PST

The "Ministry of Truth" is among us

Do you regularly visit Wikipedia.com for information? If you ever use Google to research something quickly, chances are a Wikipedia entry is probably at the top of the list. Most people regard Wikiped...
Posted by Rachel Ann on Wed, 22 Aug 2007 04:53:00 PST