I only have one rule, 'there are no rules' which I break because I follow it.
Go ahead search for something ----
http://www.dooogle.com
http://www.virtualarmwrestling.blogspot.com
Stand up comedy
I've seen: Zach Galifianakis, Mitch Hedberg, Sarah Silverman, Nick Swardson, David Cross, Brian Regan, Dave Attell, Eugene Mirman, Harland Williams, Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Dave Chapelle, Bill Cosby, Jim Gaffigan, Mike Birbiglia, Sklar Brothers, Brian Posehn, Patton Oswalt, Pablo Francisco, John Heffron, Bob Marley, Craig Shoemaker, Daryl Hammond, Bob Saget, Norm Macdonald, Todd Barry, Jon Glaser, Aziz Ansari, Jon Benjamin, Demetri Martin, Michael Showalter, AD Miles
I want to see: Louis C.K., Stella, Jonathan Katz
The people responsible for these quotes:
"Women are a complicated bunch. Let me give you an analogy, they're like grapes. Thats all I've got, cause I said bunch, so I thought of grapes...... If I had said women are an complicated group, I would've thought of...shit, I thought of grapes again."
"Someday I’m gonna own a place near Carnegie Hall and when people ask me how to get there, I’m gonna say, Practice, practice, practice... then make a left."
"I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort."
"My girlfriend looks a little bit like Charlize Theron... and a lot like Patrick Ewing."
"I was tryin to get some stank on my hang down and the bitch hit me in my top nod with a smoothy."
"Naw man, you don't want to fuck with me man. I'm like a earthquake, wrapped in a hurricane, nestled in a box of tsunamis. I'm like a natural disaster times triplicate."
"I'm sorry and I apologize mean the same thing... unless you are at a funeral."
"Many people do not realize that the snowshoe can be used for a great many things besides walking on snow. For instance, it can be used to carry pancakes from the stove to the breakfast table. Also, it can be used to carry uneaten pancakes from the table to the garbage. Finally, it can be used as a kind of strainer, where you force pancakes through the strings to see if a piece of gold got in a pancake somehow."
"When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor."
"I can kill a dog in six ways. Five of them are throwing missiles at it."
"I've been sticking $30 in pennies up my ass for the past 11 years! That's 3,000 pennies a day; 21,000 pennies a week; 1,092,000 pennies a year! To date that's 12,012,000 pennies, 8 times the population of Nebraska. Those pennies were in my ass! You think you're better than me? Oh, you're not better than me. You handle my ass pennies everyday. You pick up my ass pennies for good luck. You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them. You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs with."
"Swimming is good for you... especially if you're drowning."
"How about if Six Flags, Taco Bell & Red Bull were looking to mount a travelling production for the Punk version of Meatloaf's 'Bat Out Of Hell'..... I've got the cast they's lookin for right here!"
and this kid...
.. ..
Ride, My Bloody Valentine, Spiritualized/Spacemen 3, The Beach Boys, Nadja, Jesu, Machinefabriek, The Goslings, Black Boned Angel, Birchville Cat Motel, This Heat, Laddio Bolocko, Psychic Paramount, Harvey Milk, Worms, Angelic Process, Hjarnidaudi, Wolves in the Throne Room, Weakling, Opeth, Enslaved, Corrupted, Asunder, Om, Andrew Chalk, Mirror, Deathprod, Aidan Baker, Hwyl Nofio, Brian Eno, Eluvium, Tor Lundvall, Tim Hecker, Jasper TX, Marsen Jules, Colleen, William Basinski, Keith Fullerton Whitman, Greg Haines, Library Tapes, Grouper, Maeror Tri, Troum, Stars of the Lid, :Zoviet*France, Nigel Wright, Port-Royal, Burial, Fennesz, Earth, Growing, Chapterhouse, Slowdive, The Naked Souls, Telescopes, Astrobrite, Medicine, Amp, Swervedriver, Loveliescrushing, Secret Shine, Ecstasy of St.Theresa, Adorable, Loop, Catherine Wheel, Lilys, Amon Duul II, Can, Agitation Free, Ash Ra Tempel, Faust, Guru Guru, Gunter Schickert, Popol Vuh, Taj Mahal Travellers, Flower Travellin' Band, Les Rallizes Denudés, Wire, The Replacements, The Fall, Savage Republic, Swans, Current 93, Death in June, Sol Invictus, Dead Can Dance, This Mortal Coil, Eyeless in Gaza, Martyn Bates, Roxy Music, Glenn Branca, Rhys Chatham, Velvet Underground, Neil Young, Big Star, Marvin Gaye, Al Green, Them, Shadows of Knight, Modern Lovers, Talking Heads, The Sound, Echo and the Bunnymen, Magazine, The Soft Boys, The Feelies, Talk Talk, Mark Hollis, The Comsat Angels, Japan, David Sylvian, Afghan Whigs, Jeff Buckley, Mazzy Star, Deep Puddle Dynamics, Sole, El-P, Cage, Aesop Rock, Sage Francis, Grand Buffet, MF DOOM, Cannibal Ox, Dalek, Amon Tobin, Cinematic Orchestra, Bohren and der Club of Gore, Miles Davis, Max Roach, Clifford Brown, Oliver Nelson, Eric Dolphy, Freddie Hubbard, Donald Byrd, Andrew Hill, Thelonius Monk, John Coltrane, Annexus Quam, Ass Coffee, Residual Echoes, Lichens, Dead Meadow, Bardo Pond, Alasehir, Suishou No Fune, Dead Machines, Wolf Eyes, Axolotl, Dead C, Gate, Vibracathedral Orchestra, Rosy Parlane, Skullflower, Sunroof!, Total, Hototogisu, Mirag, Starving Weirdos, Expo '70, No-Neck Blues Band, Black Forest/Black Sea, Incredible String Band, Fairport Convention, Forest, Fresh Maggots, Comus, Pentangle, Bert Jansch, John Fahey, James Blackshaw, Jack Rose, Mountains, Six Organs of Admittance, Wooden Wand, Gang Gang Dance, Panda Bear, Lightning Bolt, Earthless, Phantomsmasher, Autolux, Efterklang, Wilderness, Microphones, Neutral Milk Hotel, Woven Hand, Sonic Youth, Melvins, Chavez, Dinosaur Jr., Codeine, Built to Spill, A Minor Forest, Slint, GYBE!, Mono, Do Make Say Think, Tarentel, Explosions in the Sky, Red Sparowes, Conifer, Pelican, Tides, Cult of Luna, Isis, MGR, Ocean, Neurosis, Converge, Supermachiner, Circle, Hammers of Misfortune, Godflesh, Boris, SunnO))), Hlidolf, Dead Raven Choir, Wolfmangler, Tomb Of..., Cicadashrine, Mrtyu!, Wolfskull, Electric Wizard, Sleep, Knut, Graves at Sea, Hyatari, Moss, Buried at Sea, Deathspell Omega, Satyricon, Vader, Xasthur, Leviathan, Krohm, Drudkh, Nachtmystium, Velvet Cacoon.......and every hit song from the 80's
"My most memorable childhood fantasy was to have a mansion with catacombs underneath containing, in endless winding dimly lit musty rows, every album ever released."
–Lester Bangs
Dr. Strangelove, Happiness, Spinal Tap, Back to the Future, Pulp Fiction, The Vanishing, Down By Law, Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, Royal Tenenbaums, Rushmore, Bottle Rocket, Withnail & I, Best in Show, Wet Hot American Summer, Ferris Bueller, Made, Half Baked, What About Bob?, Slackers, Punch Drunk Love, Clerks, Super Troopers, Karate Kid, Breakfast Club, Big Lebowski, Blood Simple, Lock Stock, Snatch, City of God, Being John Malkovich, Eternal Sunshine, Elling, Melvin Goes to Dinner, Rejected("My spoon is too big")
Home Movies, The Office, Brass Eye, Mr. Show, Arrested Development, The State, Aqua Teen, Kids in the Hall, Wonder Showzen, Extras, Family Guy, Ali G (Bo!), Sifl and Olly, Daily Show, UCB, Reno 911, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Dr. Katz, Freaks and Geeks, Undeclared, Lucky Louie, Tom Goes to the Mayor, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!
Journey to the End of the Night, Death on the Installment Plan, Confederacy of Dunces, Catch 22, Slaughterhouse 5, On the Road, Dharma Bums, Catcher in the Rye, Nine Stories, Les Miserables, The Count of Monte Cristo, High Fidelity
Erdõs, Lovász, Tutte, Seymour