Ok, you really want to know things about me? First off, I curse way too fucking much. It is like a release...but not really.
I do not eat meat (ok, I may eat fish but fish don't have feelings...AHAHA! Just kidding...but I do eat fish.) That does not make me better than you, by much anyhow.
Seriously, I am not a narcist, I just have a weird sense of humor.
I like human taphonomy studies, funeral sciences, apidocere (no, not the FUCKING band, you queermo), human biology and shit like that.
Yes, I know, that is soooooo sociopathic and icky omg!
Ok, would it make you feel better to learn that I also like to do normal things too? What? Well, for one thing, I like to read about serial killers...what? You don't do that? Well, let me try again...I like to get real tan, bleach mah hair, dress up all HAWT, drink totally killer Zimas, grind on HAWT duders and totally partay all tha TYME!! WOOOO! How is that? *scoops out eyeballs*
I am the opposite of a barbie doll....I am charter member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee...I lust after ellipses...*OH MY GOD YES!*...I can be lazy...I can be aloof, shy and flaky in person, especially if I really like you....I am pale and thin but out of shape (yeah, fuck you, I bet you are not a bronzed and toned god/dess either, you hooker)...I smoke Kools waaaaaaaaay too much....I am weirder than you may be able to tolerate...I bite...I am a tall-Norske-amazon with big feet, thick thighs and big arms...RWAR!!! SUPER NORSKE LADY WANT GRAPES!!!
I can tear your soul apart...ok, well, I would try my hardest. If not successful I will have to use my fallback..THUMB WRASLIN'!!
Yes, I am weird...yes. I am not only just saying that to come across as "cool and eccentric". I really am a fucking weird person. You don't like reading about decomposition, funeral customs, human anamolies or tapeworms? Well...I do. Mmmmm...tape worms.
Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net
