Paul profile picture

Paul

I am mostly friendly!

About Me

I write for a living. I live in London. I used to live in New Orleans, and may again.
Myspace Layouts

My Interests

I am interested in the odd, the ephemeral, the scandalous, the salacious, the hypocritical, the messianic, the transgressive and other polysyllabbic phenomena.

I am 'retrosexual'. I like this...

...and this...

Behold... the dance of the future!

I'd like to meet:

Thespians, cinematic vixens, camera operators, and burlesque entertainers.
.. width="425" height="350"
"Gentlemen, I give you Katrina!!"

width="425" height="350" ..

I'd also like to meet Kenny Drebsen, "King of the Burn".

This is important work he's doing!

Nancy Sinatra. The only talented Sinatra.

'She 'rolls' offstage at the end of her act... Who does that now?

Music:

Early punk, Sex Pistols, The Stooges, Richard Hell, Andrews Sisters, Speedball Baby, Bertrand Burgalat, Can, Baader Meinhof (the band, not the terrorists), Eric Satie, Ann Margret, the BombGangGirlz, Television, early Nico, burlesque soundtracks, The Cesarians, April March, Serge Gainsbourg, Genetica, Scissor Sisters, Al Green, Dusty Springfield, Stereolab, April March, Zip Zip Undo Me, Chantal Goya, France Gall, My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult, Elvis, Julie Driscoll, Combustible Edison, X-Ray Spex, Lee Hazelwood and Nancy Sinatra, Kurt Weill, Kraftwerk, Carl Perkins, "Charlie's bass playing", lounge music, The Troublemakers, Glory Bee, Kurt Weill, Brian Eno, first generation psychedelia, Syd Barrett, Borodin, Bowie, Bolan and other interesting stuff beginning with 'B' (except for Bono, I hate that cunt!)...and I don't like Frank Sinatra either. And they say that the delectable Madamoiselle Gall was not fully aware of the 'symbolic conceptualisations behind this charming song about aniseed lollipops...

Movies:

Welcome to the Dollhouse, Night of the Hunter, Memento, Something About Mary, Static, Vamp, Buffalo 66, A Matter of Life and Death, The Devil Is A Woman, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, The Maltese Falcon, Cabaret, Waiting for Guffman, Spinal Tap, Being John Malkovich, Spinal Tap, Wedding Crashers, Rushmore..

Television:

Reno 911, anything by Chris Morris or Armando Iannucci, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Larry Sanders Show, Sopranos, Scare Tactics, Alan Partridge, Peep Show, Glam Metal Detectives, Father Ted, Columbo, The Daily Show, and anything by Stephen Colbert.

Books:

I'll get a list together some day.

Heroes:

We love you Jen!!! R.I.P.

My Blog

Q: Is it wrong to get divorced, and then masturbate onto a cat?

I was clearing through boxes and boxes of junk that I recently took back from my sister's attic, when I found this extremely handy 'cut out and keep' auto-morality guide. I think it came from a copy o...
Posted by Paul on Mon, 23 Apr 2007 06:51:00 PST

Ladders from Space

After all the controversy about Google Earth allegedly showing Satellite pictures of New Orleans taken before Hurricane Katrina, so the city didn't look so bad, (and then supposedly putting back the p...
Posted by Paul on Tue, 17 Apr 2007 05:15:00 PST

Guns don't kill people, two year olds with AK 47s do...

There have been 59 people murdered so far in New Orleans this year. That's MURDERED! Not just shot. It's not illegal, according to Sheriff Harry Lee for a man to try and buy an AK47 sub-machine gun fo...
Posted by Paul on Thu, 12 Apr 2007 06:46:00 PST

"De-gayed" in three weeks! That's the power of prayer...

Let no-one now cast doubt upon the healing power of prayer and God's propensity to seed miracles around us every day, if we did but just open our eyes. In the greatest miracle since the parting of the...
Posted by Paul on Sun, 25 Mar 2007 09:31:00 PST

"A new breed of super rabbit!"

Lonely man brought donkey to hotel room, court told Monday, 26 February 2007A man who was found dressed in latex and handcuffs brought a donkey to his room in a Galway city centre hotel, because h...
Posted by Paul on Fri, 09 Mar 2007 05:55:00 PST

Akron! Home of Devo, Rachel Sweet, and the rubber tire...

Akron on New Year's Eve...Akron! It's kinda turn right at Chicago, and drive like fuck!...SCENE: The Dairy MartSo here we are encamped in Akron, on New Year's Eve, half way back to London, and I go to...
Posted by Paul on Sun, 31 Dec 2006 03:22:00 PST

British politician threatened my wife with Dick shocker!

It's been a few years since I thought about Lembit Opik, the British MP who is making headlines in all the tabloid newspapers, after his split with 48 year old, TV weather girl Sian Lloyd after six ye...
Posted by Paul on Mon, 18 Dec 2006 11:08:00 PST

Vegetarians are smarter!

From the BBCHigh IQ link to being vegetarian Intelligent children are more likely to become vegetarians later in life, a study says.A Southampton University team found those who were vegetarian by 30...
Posted by Paul on Fri, 15 Dec 2006 11:47:00 PST

Stripping is ruled as art in Norway

The Times December 07, 2006Artistic strippers win the right to take off their VATMarcus Oscarsson in Stockholm and Roger BoyesStriptease, the tantalising dance pioneered by Salome in the Old Testament...
Posted by Paul on Thu, 07 Dec 2006 07:27:00 PST

My Dog Pieman was in The Times of London!

I'm sorry, but is my dog, cool or what? Pieman's MySpace 'dog blog' has just been featured in an article in that august newspaper of record, The Times (London). http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,...
Posted by Paul on Tue, 05 Dec 2006 10:56:00 PST