Evil Monkey profile picture

Evil Monkey

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me



I edited my profile with Thomas’ Myspace Editor V3.6 !

I am faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. I invented the internal combustion engine, the Latin language, the cotton gin, the Lambada craze and wood. I have won 2 daytime Emmys and a merit badge in bewilderment. I majored in animal husbandry at Harvard (until they caught me at it one day) and i come from a long line of over-acheivers; including my grandfather who stormed the beach at Normandy (which would have been admirable except that he did it in 1972 to bewildered cries of "Quoi?, Quoi?" from local authorities).embed enableJavascript="false" allowscriptaccess="never" allownetworking="internal" allowScriptAccess="never" src="http://www.treborwear.com/newfridge.swf?user=KEYWESTEVI LMONKEY" quality="high" wmode="transparent" width="400" height="500" align="middle

My Interests

Spelunking, trainspotting, alchemy, haberdashery, extreme philately, cross-country bowling, full-contact chess, nude flagpole sitting.

I'd like to meet:

Anyone willing to suspend their disbelief and join me on this strange, thrilling, sometimes scary, always fun rollercoaster ride that is my life.

Music:

Dresden Dolls, Bowling For Soup, The Vandals, Bobby Darin, Elvis, Sinatra, Wagner, Beethoven, Sex Pistols, Dead Boys, Screeching Weasel, Colin Hay, Ani Difranco, Robert Johnson, David Lee Roth, Alice Cooper, Reel Big Fish, and many many many more.I have over 8000 songs on my ipod

Movies:

Classics, Comedies , Marx Bros., W.C. Fields, Chaplin, Anything with Malcolm Mcdowell, Christopher Walken, Dennis Hopper, All Scorsese films. I hate hate hate remakes!!!!

Television:

Family Guy, Simpsons, Aqua teen, Drawn Together, Reno 911, Scrubs, Coupling, The office, Black Adder, Red Dwarf, Father Ted, Lots of A@E, Discovery, etc. Mythbusters

Books:

I have thousands. I love the classics and I am someone who actually does read them instead of using them as decorations. Shakespeare, Dickens, Marlowe, I also love Oscar Wilde, Saki, Wodehouse, Orwell, I recommend Stephen Fry's novels not Frey, Fry.

Heroes:

Myself, for constantly kicking me in the ass and forcing me to do all those things I was too afraid to try. No one else would do it, so i took it upon myself to force myself to play music, do theater, stand-up comedy and profesional close-up and stage magic. I did it all and succeeded in them all. i was the only one who took it upon myself to take that leap and succeed.
About you (quite unique)
Would you rather
Pierce your nose or tounge?: Tongue
Be serious or funny?: Funny
Drink whole milk or skim?: whole
Are you
Simple or complicated?: both
Loving or cold hearted?: Loving to friends, cold as ice to enemies
Do you prefer
Angels or flowers?: I'm straight
Grey or black?: Grey
colored photos or black and white ones?: B&W
lust or love?: Can't i have both?
sunrise or sunset?: sunset
M&Ms or Skittles?: M&Ms
Rap or rock?: Rock
Staying up late or waking up early?: Staying up late
Tv or Radio?: TV
Eating apples or eating oranges?: Apples
Answer truthfully
Do you have a crush?: Of course
if so do they know?: possibly
More do you prefer
Being hot or cold?: cold
short or tall members of the opposite sex?: both
Sun or moon?: moon
Emeralds or rubies?: emeralds (the Irish in me)
Vanilla or choclate ice cream?: chocolate
Boys or girls?: girls, girls, girls
Low fat or fat free?: fat free, if your gonna do it, do it all the way
green beans or carrots?: green beans
About you
What time is it?: 6:41 pm
Name: Greg
Nicknames: none that I can print
Tattoos: 2
Piercings: 0
What do you want?!?!
Where do you want to live?: Anywhere can be paradise
How many kids do you want?: 2 or maybe 3 if I'm real hungry
What kind of job do you want?: Bikini Inspector
Do you want to get married?: did it once, but I'd do it again
Unique
Nervous habbits:: making sarcastic comments
Are you double jointed?: no
Can you roll your tounge?: I can do many things with my tongue ;)
Can you raise one eyebrow?: yes
can you cross your eyes?: yes
Can you blow a spit bubble?: never tried
Do you make your bed daily?: if I'm expecting company
Which shoe do you put on first?: first one i find
Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at somebody?: no
on average how much money do you carry with you?: Why are you going to mug me?
What jewlery do you wear?: watch
Favorite piece of clothing?: The last one to come off
FOOD
Do you twirl your spagetti or cut it?: twirl
Have you ever eaten spam?: no
Favorite ice cream flavor?: Praline Pecan
how many kinds of cereal are in you cabnet?: 2
whats your favorite beverage?: Coca Cola
whats your favorite resturant?: P.T's Late Night the manager is a God!
Do you cook?: if I must
Grooming
How often do you brush your teeth?: 2 or 3x per day
Hair drying method:: towel
Have you ever colored/highlighted your hair/whatcolor?: I'm straight
do you ever spit?: only when necessary
you own more than one brush:: no
your favorite color(s) is:: Silver
you plan on going to college:: done it
you're completely broke right now:: On paper maybe, not sure
you're happy with your hair:: I gave up on it a long time ago I just let it be
you own a dog:: yes
you spend your money wisely:: on women food and booze - the rest i squander
you're always making new friends:: always more than i can count
you like to swim:: not so much
you got bored so you took a shower?: ????
you're patient:: come on! next question!
What time is it now?: daytime
Random shit
Favorite cheese?: provolone or mozzorella
favorite nail polish color?:
ever been streaking?: Yes
how many concerts have you been to?: too many to count
Moshing or skanking?: hows that now?
Do you play DDR?: Dirty Dancing Roulette?
do you like llamas?: only the dark meat
how about monkies?: I ma plagued by an evil one that lives under my bed
favorite type of music:: everything but rap
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My Blog

come haunt with me

The 6th annual Haunting of Fort Taylor will take place this year from October 28-31. This event is a non-profit to help save the historic 1845 Fort. We need volunteers, donations and sponsors. Volunte...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Wed, 10 Oct 2007 10:29:00 PST

Fine Corinthian Leather

Well, it was a long 7 month run, but I sold out my interest in GTFM LLC (by the way, that stood for "Get The Fucking Money"). I did just that, got in, boosted business, then cut and run with a nice ti...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 09:43:00 PST

Tolerance and Tradition

Tolerance and TraditionIt seems that over the last decade or so a new Christmas tradition has sprung up. Basically some jackass will come along and complain about a Christmas tree being erected in a p...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Tue, 26 Dec 2006 03:24:00 PST

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas TreeI remember my first experience with a Christmas tree in Key West. It was 1997 and my girlfriend (eventually to become my wife, eventually to become my ex-wife) and ...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Tue, 26 Dec 2006 03:23:00 PST

Those Golden days (that never were)

Balding; the word that comes immediately to mind when I think about my twentieth high school reunion, which I attended last week. Of course I looked fabulous, blessed as I am with a shock of unruly ha...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Tue, 12 Dec 2006 12:28:00 PST

A Pictures worth a Thousand Words& so shut up already.

Ever since my column began appearing in this paper in the late Fall of 1936, there has been one thing about it which has caused much discussion and lively debate; the accompanying picture of your humb...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Tue, 12 Dec 2006 12:28:00 PST

A Very Moving Experience

Ah, moving. The joy, the pleasure, of cramming everything you own into cardboard boxes scrounged from every available source, finding some unwitting friends, acquaintances, or passing strangers willin...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Tue, 12 Dec 2006 12:25:00 PST

fantasy fest article

Fantasy Fest, 650 years of traditionAs many of my loyal fans noticed, I did not have an article in last week..s Conch Color. The reason for my failure to make the deadline is a simple one, and one tha...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Mon, 13 Nov 2006 01:55:00 PST

conch color halloween

IMPORTANT HALLOWE..EN SAFETY TIPS..Tis now the very witching hour of night, when churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out contagion to the air. Now could I drink hot blood and do such bitter busi...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Thu, 09 Nov 2006 12:32:00 PST

conch color article 9

Bridge Over Troubled, er, pavement.Recently there has been a lot of hullabaloo, and ballyhoo regarding the brouhaha over Southard Street..s Truman Annex entrance. It seems that the owners of Truman An...
Posted by Evil Monkey on Fri, 06 Oct 2006 01:47:00 PST