mezandro (ADIDAS - find out the meaning!)

How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in life, when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself? If there is a stage at which an individual life becomes truly adult, it must be when one grasps the irony in its unfolding and accepts responsibility for a life lived in the midst of such paradox. One must live in the middle of contradiction, because if all contradiction were eliminated at once life would collapse. There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light.- Barry LopezBut I am what I am... What's the sense? lols - m3zandro"Three passions have governed my life. The longings for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind]. Love brings ecstasy and relieves loneliness. In the union of love I have seen in a mystic miniature the prefiguring vision of the heavens that saints and poets have imagined. With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of [people]. I have wished to know why the stars shine. Love and knowledge led upwards to the heavens, but always pity brought me back to earth; Cries of pain reverberated in my heart of children in famine, of victims tortured and of old people left helpless. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.All of my miserable life, I have been happy, angry, vain, envy, lust, warfreak, idiots, dishonest, feard, nervous, scared, harmed, but in the end, I have been loved. All of me were true that's why I lived in people's oppposite expectations. I have noticed that I listened to mushy songs about my pains, tears, sufferings, and short-while happiness. I have been unblessed for all of the life that I have lived. But still faith is in my heart and it will stay for eternity. A lot of people hated me for I have been very unchristian and inhumane of the people I used to be a short-while acquiantances. I could be silent to my self but I could also be noisy to the people. What they doesn't know is that I am suffering from pain that I have experienced from my family, lovelife, friends and from my life itself. I am very transparent person in which people expected. I came from a disgusting place where people disgusted me on my own taste. And through it all, I am of what I am. This has been my life; I found it worth living. And I believe that a useless life is an early death.