American Hotrod profile picture

American Hotrod

Living On The End Of A Lightning Bolt

About Me

I was born on a pig farm and raised by a pack of wolves. I'm now living in a concrete jungle. Life just keeps getting better. MyGen Profile Generator MyGen Profile Generator MyGen Profile Generator

My Interests

Pursuing a stand-up career. Guitar. Books. My Kitty. Breathing in everything that life has to offer.

I'd like to meet:

Shubunka, Bernard Marx, Little Ceaser, Christopher Cross, Winston Smith, Jesus Christ, Captain Spaulding, Tony Clifton, Titus Andronicus, Travis Bickle, and many other fictional characters that breathe more life than most anyone I've ever met.

Music:

Marilyn Manson, Dream Theater, Jim Croce, Tori Amos, Rasputina, Pink Floyd, Emily's Toybox, Fiona Apple, Weird Al Yankovic, Frank Zappa, Cab Calloway, Steve Vai, Pantera, NIN, Tom Waits, John 5, Joe Satriani, Smashing Pumpkins, Bob Dylan, David Bowie, The Beatles, John Lennon, Anthrax, Black Sabbath, The Doors, Dave Matthews Band, Rob Zombie, Slayer, etc.....

Movies:

Scarlet Street, The Shawshenk Redemption, The Gangster, Freaks, The Sea Wolf, The Woman In The Window, Angels With Dirty Faces, The Reflecting Skin, Marx Brothers, Scarlet Empress, Odishon, Cannibal! The Musical, Clockwork Orange, Phantasm, House of 1000 Corpses, The Devil's Rejects, Killer Klowns From Outer Space, Man on the Moon, The Naked Kiss, Sleeper, Salo, Dagon, Ravenous, Quills, Irreversible, Battle Royale, Seul Contre Tous, Killing Zoe, The Wizard Of Oz, Arlington Road, Forrest Gump, American Beauty, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, The Goonies, With Honors, Santa Sangre, El Topo, The Ninth Gate, Happiness, UHF etc...

Television:

Biography and History channels, Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Twilight Zone, The Simpsons, 80's wrestling, The Wonder Years, MacGyver, Hannity and Colmes, The O'Reilly Factor, Real Time.

Books:

(Auto)biographies are among my greatest reading pleasures, religious texts, true crime, Aldous Huxley, George Orwell, Anton Szandor LaVey, Blanche Barton, Aleister Crowley, H.P. Lovecraft, Marquis De Sade, Jack London, Clive Barker, Oscar Wilde, Stehpen King, E.A. Poe, Edward Arlington Robinson, Henry Rollins, Ambrose Bierce, and many more.

Heroes:

I don't have heroes, just deep inspirational figures. Edward G. Robinson, James Cagney, Marilyn Manson, Aldous Huxley, Rob Zombie, Woody Allen, Bill Hicks, Lenny Bruce, Oscar Wilde, Henry Rollins, George Orwell, etc...

My Blog

Another Dead Hero

My tribute to Anna Nicole Smith. Please ignore the lack of clouds, harps, pearly gates and the fact that she was far from a stick figure for the peak of her celebrity. ...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Sat, 10 Feb 2007 06:42:00 PST

The Season of Insincerity

So we're in the middle of the holiday season and all of the fly-by-night religious and charitable types are coming out of the woodwork to show everyone how much they pretend to worship and/or care. I...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Wed, 20 Dec 2006 10:12:00 PST

Hooters Is The Pits

I went to Hooters the other night for the first time. I had no idea what to expect except that they're supposed to have scantily clad waitresses. Being that it was Schoolgirl Night, a night when they ...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Fri, 01 Dec 2006 09:10:00 PST

The Biggest Gift Shop On Earth (my Disney trip pt.1)

I'll start my diatribe into my Disney experience with some of the more interesting things I found while down there. Don't expect too much segue material here, I'm just going to ramble off the cuff. ...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Sat, 07 Oct 2006 01:23:00 PST

Cell Phones In Movie Theaters

Cell Phones In Movie Theaters In my life I've seen less than 20 movies in the theater. Huge screen, perfect sound, it could be such a great experience, but being in the company of utter morons c...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Sun, 10 Sep 2006 09:49:00 PST

Those Little Lies

This is about women who actively lie to themselves, and ultimately to everyone else. The following is a dramatization, intended for entertainment purposes only. I never had this particular conversatio...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Sun, 27 Aug 2006 10:27:00 PST

A Small Note To All Aspiring Authors

If you're going to write a book about serial killers, don't put Charles Manson on the cover. It completely ruins any credibility you may have had being that Charlie was never convicted of killing...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Sat, 22 Jul 2006 03:12:00 PST

even-steven

I've come to realize that I am even-steven. I'm a walking dichotomy, but in the end I'm completey neutralized. I've been going to a shrink for the past couple of weeks to get my head straight. T...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Fri, 21 Jul 2006 07:10:00 PST

The Professional Loafer

This is my brother, a professional loafer. 32 years old, still living at home with mom. He goes through jobs like a hooker through condoms. Funny thing is everytime I go over to visit my mom he tries ...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Thu, 13 Jul 2006 09:32:00 PST

The Meandering Relationship Endeavor

Yesterday I had a date with a woman who is an astrologer. I showed up at her house and as we were getting ready to leave I asked her to look in her crystal ball or pull out her tarot cards or whatever...
Posted by Jesus Was A Charlatan on Mon, 10 Jul 2006 10:09:00 PST