Peasant Wagons, Superman and Psychics |
Dear Diary,
All I can say is, "Oh My God!" My car broke down this morning on the way to work and I couldn't phone the AA or ask anyone for help because I was slightly intoxified from the celebra...
Posted by Joanna on Thu, 01 Jun 2006 11:08:00 PST |
I'm Baccckkk! |
Dear Diary,
Okay! Okay! I know I haven't updated you lately but I've been under extreme torture and I can tell you something...Iraq has nothing on the techniques they use at The Priory! Not...
Posted by Joanna on Wed, 31 May 2006 06:14:00 PST |
Fuckin' Funerals |
Dear Diary
Sorry I haven't been able to update you but you see I had a lot on my plate...probably not as much as Fatty Lou but quite a considerable amount. First off, I'm sick of this fucking wh...
Posted by Joanna on Sat, 08 Apr 2006 01:57:00 PST |
Little Chocolate Men and wheelchairs! |
Dear Diary,
Last night didn't go as well as hoped! First off I locked Fatty Fatty Lou Lou in her room with two bags of M&Ms and her easy bake oven. Kids these days! It's keeps he...
Posted by Joanna on Thu, 06 Apr 2006 03:38:00 PST |
Fairy Cakes, Shrek and Backseat Loving |
Dear Diary,
Well I have finished that bottle now and feel up for a party. Shrek came home about dinner time and wanted to make Fairy Cakes. So I told her- "theres nothing fairy like about ...
Posted by Joanna on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 12:18:00 PST |
Fucking Teenagers! |
Not going shopping now as I am in a foul mood. I've been forced to open a bottle of bacardi because some silly little girl doesn't know who I am...well I do! I am Joanna Kensington....eat ...
Posted by Joanna on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 07:13:00 PST |
Blair Witch |
Dear Diary,
I feel terrible...Had one too many vodkas last night and at least two too many bottles of Shiraz. I woke up in the park this morning, surrounded by trees. You have no idea how ...
Posted by Joanna on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 01:50:00 PST |
Coco Pops, Pizza Hut and Laxatives |
Dear Diary,
I'm back and I'm worried (again). The stress of this lie and the financial situation has become far too big for an extremely sexual skinny girl, who men fantasize about frequently, l...
Posted by Joanna on Tue, 04 Apr 2006 12:36:00 PST |
Banana Muffins and Jimmy Choos |
Dear Diary,
Banana muffins turned out swell! I have really taught her well. She practically did everything by herself. She even managed to add the nip of brandy into them.&nbs...
Posted by Joanna on Tue, 04 Apr 2006 07:05:00 PST |
Ex Marks the Spot |
Dear Diary,
That selfish bastard has done it again! He called himself a father and then kills himself to get out of paying maintenance! I wouldnt have minded so much if he had at le...
Posted by Joanna on Tue, 04 Apr 2006 06:13:00 PST |
