Turn your head to the left and cough! profile picture

Turn your head to the left and cough!

All a girl really wants is for 1 guy to prove to her that they're not all the same.'' Marilyn Monroe

About Me



.. ..



You Are Las Vegas
Wild and uninhibited, you enjoy all of life's vices.
You're a total hedonist, especially with sex, gambling, and drinking.
You shine brightly every night, but you do the ultimate walk of shame each morning.
Famous Las Vegas residents: Wayne Newton, Howard Hughes, Penn & Teller, Siegfried & Roy What American City Are You?
Lets get some of the easy stuff out of the way. I work at McDonalds, trying to save my money so I can buy my first Huffy.. That way I can get a real job at Walmart pushing carts. (working on my tan while doing so) Once I get in shape doing that I'm going to take my killer tan and athletic body to California and become famous... And no you can't have the hook up at Miky D's, I don't want to loose my job.
I've always been told they broke the mold when they made me. Or in other words, a breed all my own. I'm like an open book. Alot of times there is hidden meaning in what you read, however you don't find that out till you get close to the end. On the flip-side, instead of finding out later just ask. Blut, and sometimes painfully truthful, the last thing I want to do is hurt anyones feelings. Extremly business oriented, smart and sucessful for my age. Purposly biting off more then I can chew just to see if I can chew it. ....... Well I can't spell very well, I'm a cluts, I love to laugh, watch movies, hang out, relax. Well rounded in a variety of different life and work ethics. Its a rarity that I get embarrassed, but when I do I try to laugh at myself, atleast if no one esle is why can't I? Believing nothing of what I hear and half of what I see. I love wine, sushi, food, sometimes I can't stop eating, lol and I have no idea where it goes. There is nothing better then a thunderstorm. Thrill seeker and adenaline junkie. Sleeping all day is a waste of time, we are only here for so long. In other words I like to go do stuff, anything I don't care, just not stuck in the house like you currently are reading my page! Oh yeah, I was once asked by a great wise woman cough cough* ashleigh~~ If you pick your nose, start rolling and drop in mid roll.... Do you pick it up and finish rolling or just leave it? SOOOO...UM... am I the ONLY one laughing at this point? P.S. Just a clue, cuz now your wondering, it says 'SINGLE' for a reason. Thats by choice. Not enough hours in the day to date unless... hum.... I would like a super hot boyfriend cuz I've never had one. If you have tats and any kind of street bike that you can teach me how to stunt on with you.... You get major props... In other words I'm just a big dork, and extremly sarcstic. lol .. but I did mean it about the hot boy friend thing and the tats... Now contiune below for more...
You are now marked on my profile visitor map!
You're an Expert Kisser
You're a kissing pro, but it's all about quality and not quantity
You've perfected your kissing technique and can knock anyone's socks off
And you're adaptable, giving each partner what they crave
When it comes down to it, your kisses are truly unforgettable

My Interests


THE GREATEST WOMAN I HAVE EVER KNOWN. ~03.05.07~
I LOVE AND MISS YOU SO MUCH MOM.... THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME THE GREATEST GIFT IN LIFE... YOUR LOVE.

YOU CANT HELP BUT LAUGH. COME ON ITS FUNNY

I MEAN REALLY? WHAT ELSE DO WE NEED TO SAY?

HEY D.B.! THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL BETTER THEN FRESH! ITS STRAIGHT UP PIMP!

NEED I SAY MORE! ITS JUST HOW WE ROLL!

AWW!...

BEN GOODMAN... THE LOVE OF MY LIFE... MUAH!

I MEAN... HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE HIM. BRANDON YOUR THE SHIT!

BY FAR THE WORST PICTURE I HAVE... AND YOU KNOW WHAT .... I DONT GIVE A SHIT!

JOSH ARE YOU ALWAYS SO CUTE?

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENDS WHEN YOU HANG OUT WITH MY FRIENDS.

7 KEGS, 3,000 JELLO SHOTS, 200 PEOPLE, AND MAKING MEMORIES WITH YOUR FRIENDS.... DOES IT GET ANY BETTTER?

Cool Slideshows

Cool Slideshows

PRE HALLOWEEN PARTY...

Cool Slideshows

dood I'm still its even hard for menti jshusyhtfwjahg I'm fukn drunk I think gsjdkhs I'm lugfing uncontollllllibly hukehu holy shiy I'm so fucd up we shuld call our rents then ur bro thn my bro jesshtukwdlauhwukenwuhifgrjq ha ha this is fun oh yeah and um drunk cuz I hate menI'm sorry you hate men, but this is just too damn funny i cant' stop laughing.

I DON'T KNOW!

Nice boobs, I mean damn my hair looks good.
Aww! I love my purse, lol and you to Trey!
THE BEST PICTURE I THINK I HAVE EVER TAKEN LOL... WHAT ABOUT CLASS ASHLEIGH? TEE HEE YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEM ME AT THE END OF THE NIGHT... OH WAIT NO ONE DID I WAS TOO BUSY THROWING UP...

NOW ALL IT NEEDS TO SAY IN THE TOP LEFT CORNER IS "COLLEGE HUMOR"

I'd like to meet:

Hum.... Pretty much any one and every one. I love having friends and I'm not really on here to find the 'love of my life' just cool new ppl. People that can deal with my weird sence of humor. Can I be serious? Of course..... How bout you start talking and I'll let you know if i want to meet you wink* wink*----- Scratch that, sort of!
Now just real quick... this was an actual message that was sent to me. God knows I can't spell for shit. However I do know how to spell the simple, normal words in life. You know, the ones you learn in elementary. If for some reason you have the urge or incapable ablity to spell such as the example your about to read, don't write me. Again this an actual email...

Wuts good wit ya sexy! dis ya boy Jay, shit I just wanted to see wut wus happenin wit you..I might not be on here by da time you get dis but reply to it anyway and I will hit you back.Well ima put it lke dis,i aint lookin for a relationship off back,but im lookin for a girl dat can be by my side while i get my shit together right fast and when da time is right,we can take it to da next level.But da female got to be sumbody sexy (like you),and real and i can trust.Dats sum real shit i just told you so thank on dat and let me know wuts hood!

Well... dis in english... is spelt t-h-i-s. Wut in english .... is spelt w-h-a-t. I mean come on guys do you really think that its attractive to show you can't spell or have any inclination of what it is to speak correctly. Oh Oh, and those of you men that are white and speak, or type this way... lol! um go get a black marker and color yourself then it might make more sence to society as well as myself. who knows you might get a clue to. Also if you see me speaking this way back in response to your email... I'M MAKING FUN OF YOU! Girls yours is easy. NO DRAMA. In which case your cool in my book. Guys I'm a pretty laid back chick, so just a few guide lines. Please, don't have a girlfriend, or a wife, or kids. I know it sounds stupid but you would be suprised. For more info. please inquire within blog at top... ;p.... AND ONE MORE THING...FOR ALL YOU FUCKING ASSES OUT THERE THAT JUST WANT TO GET IN MY PANTS GO FIND ANOTHER PAGE TO READ. THATS ALL FOR NOW. THANK YOU VERY MUCH ANNNND HAVEAGREATDAY!

Three cowboys — from Oklahoma, Arkansas, and Texas—are sitting around a fire. The Oklahoma cowboy gloats, “Just the other day, a bull gored six men in the corral, but I wrestled it to the ground with my hands.”The Arkansan replies, “Oh, yeah? Yesterday a 15-foot rattler came at me, so I grabbed it, bit its head off, and spit the poison into a spittoon 15 yards away.”The Texan stays quiet, slowly stirring the coals with his penis.

Music:



Love just about anything from the 80's Toadies are my favorite. Frank Senatra, INXS, AL Green, well every thing that I can understand. If its in a foreign language I have alittle trouble

Movies:

Breakfast Club, Dirty Dancing, Crash, Napolean Dynamite, Fight Club, Gone in 60 seconds, Finding Nemo, Breakfast At Tiffanys, Idenity, The Recruit, The New Guy, Saw, The Pianist, (my fav. --) Goodfellas, My Best Friends Wedding, and pretty much anything scary, makes me think, cry, has fast cars, laugh, not to mention is worth watching more then once. oh yeah and Office Space, Ice Age 2,

Television:

hum? You mean when I'm that bored, CSI, Court TV, OCC, History Channel, Everyone Loves Raymond, MTV, and if I get around to burning more brain cells I will edit it then.

Books:

Take the quiz:
what type of car are you?

Supercar
you have xpensive taste and only get the fastest and sleekest. u like goin 3 times the speed limit
Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!
You Are Heineken
You appreciate a good beer, but you're not a snob about it.
You like your beer mild and easy to drink, so you can concentrate on being drunk.
Overall, you're a friendly drunk who's likely to buy a whole round for your friends... many times.
Sometimes you can be a bit boring when you drink. You may be prone to go on about topics no one cares about.
BORING? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? BORING NO, FUCKING WILD AND CRAZY YES! AND WHY THE HELL AM I A HEINEKEN WHEN I HAVE A DAMN CORONA IN MY HAND EVERY OTHER PICTURE? AND WHO DOESN'T GO OFF ON ANY TANGENT PERIOD WHEN THEY ARE DRUNK?
What's Your Beer Personality?

You Are a Coy Flirt!
You're not so much a flirt as the type of girl who draws flirts in
While you look like you're just relaxing, secretly you've got your game on
A little look here, a little wink there... you give men the encouragement they crave
And in return, they flirt up a storm with you - while you just sit and smile What Kind of Flirt Are You?

Heroes:

My Family, my friends, where would I be without them?

My Blog

Accepted

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Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Mon, 01 Jan 2007 02:47:00 PST

Wishing in one hand & Shiting in the other. Which will fill up quicker?

Life is full of suprises. Most of which are unexpected, hense the word suprise. However do you ever wonder what life would be like without suprises? Would it be dull? Would it be boring? Would there a...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Sun, 31 Dec 2006 01:40:00 PST

Dream Weaver, I believe you can get me through the night.

Are we all really just a bunch of Sellouts of our own lives in some way, shape or form? Or is life a messed up version of Californication? Mama Told Me to always trust my instincts. But for some ...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Tue, 07 Nov 2006 02:54:00 PST

Living Will

Last night, my wife and I were sitting in the livingroom talking about many things. The idea of a living will came up and said to her "Inever want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some mach...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Mon, 07 Aug 2006 06:57:00 PST

Subject: Purina Diet

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my Labrador Retriever and was in line to check out.   A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.   On impulse, I told her that no, I wa...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Mon, 07 Aug 2006 06:56:00 PST

GIRLS I HOPE YOU GET AS MUCH OF A LAUGH AS I DID.....

Dear KotexI recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my pantiliner had a bunch of Kotex Tips for Life" on it. Annoying advice such as:1. Staying active during your period can relieve cramps.2. Avoi...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Thu, 03 Aug 2006 12:34:00 PST

FOOD FOR THOUGHT..

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn'tsupposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have yourheart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time.You'll break ...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Thu, 08 Jun 2006 08:43:00 PST

JUST FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES

ONEw.a.k.e.u.pthere is NO SUCH THING as a myspace tracker.it does NOT exist. so quit posting stupid bullitens like"OH-EM-GEEEEE this WORKS!!!"no, it doesnt. you think the millions of people would have...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Wed, 07 Jun 2006 11:34:00 PST

CAN YOU DO THE MATH.....

This equation should be taught in all math classes! From a strictly mathematical view point it goes like this: What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those pe...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Tue, 06 Jun 2006 07:25:00 PST

GUYS THIS IS WHO I WANT TO MEET IF THERE IS SUCH A THING...

What makes us LOVE HIM!!He leaves her cute text messages.Kiss her in front of your friends.Trust her over everyone else.Tell her she looks beautiful.Look her in the eye when you talk to her.When she c...
Posted by JewelsGray.com NOW UNDER CONSTRUCTION! on Sun, 04 Jun 2006 02:46:00 PST