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Keiti Kuroi

katesy

About Me


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I am a total and utter narcissist. Probably way more of a narcissist than you are - wait,.. why am I talking about you?

"These myths going round, these legends, fairytales I'll put them straight; so when you stare into my face – Helen's face, Cleopatra's, Queen of Sheba's, Juliet's – then, deeper, gaze into my eyes – Nefertiti's, Mona Lisa's, Garbo's eyes – think again. The Little Mermaid slit her shining silver tale in two, rubbed salt into that stinking wound, got up and walked, in agony, in fishnet tights, stood up and smiled, waltzed, all for a Prince, a pretty boy, a charming one who'd dump her in the end, chuck her, throw her overboard. I could have told her – look, love, I should know, They're bastards when they're Princes. What you want to do is find yourself a Beast…

So I was hard on the Beast, win or lose, when I got upstairs, those tragic girls in my head, turfing him out of bed, standing alone on the balcony, the night so cold I could taste the stars on the tip of my tongue. And I made a prayer – thumbing my pearls, the tears of Mary, one by one, like a rosary – words for the lost, the captive beautiful, the wives, those less fortunate than we. The moon was a hand-mirror breathed on by a Queen. My breath was a chiffon scarf for an elegant ghost. I turned to go back inside. Bring me the Beast for the night. Bring me the wine cellar key. Let the less-loving one be me."

* * * * *

I spent last summer in SE Asia (Singapore, Malaysia, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, Japan) and I'm going back ASAP. It was awesome, stressy, funny, liberating, awe inspiring, humbling and frickin ace of frickin base. I've realised my life long dream of visiting Japan and it's even better than I imagined. Cutesy, sexy, bright, fun, to the moon. I heart Japan forever and ever and ever.

I drink and talk far too much. I moan lots. I don't eat enough vegetables or get enough sleep. I don't brush my hair very often. I grew up in a house of boys, so I don't really know how to act like a girl. I have pretty bad taste in men, clothes and music. But I'm rather snobbish when it comes to films and British comedy.

I do not trust doctors, instead I choose to self-medicate with caffiene drinks, night nurse, alcohol, pro-plus, pills, painkillers, and second-hand nicotine.

I am part Romany gypsy, part Russian mafia princess, part zombie. I am the spawn of two good looking people with mental abnormalities. Unfortunately, my brother inherited the looks, I got the mental abnormalities.

I'm stuck in Manchester, whilst everyone else I know seems to have migrated down South or is on t'other side of the world. I miss them all terribly. Myspace does allow me to spy on my beautiful friends, but it's not the same as looking at their beautiful faces in person of course.

"you can tell from the scars on my arms and cracks in my hips and the dents in my car and the blisters on my lips that i'm not the carefullest of girls...

behold the worlds worst accident I AM THE GIRL ANACHRONISM"

I do some writing for this awesome magazine


** I have decided to take these awe-inspiring quotes as my daily mantra:

"Irish Blood, English Heart, this I'm made of. There is no one on earth I'm afraid of" Morrissey

"Rather be a bitch than be an ordinary broken heart" Dresden Dolls

"If you can give it, I can take it. 'Cause if this heart is gonna break it's gonna take a lot to break it" Cher, my friends, motherfucking Cher.

If my heart could beat, it would break my chest.

My Interests

I am quite a cynical person,... sometimes I try not to be, othertimes I wallow in the misery. I quite like physical pain, which worries me. I like tattoos. I like eyeliner. I also like things which make me laugh. This can include: tv and movies, songs, friends, and other people's injuries. I don't think I ever grew out of pop - am I a teenybopper with a streak of alternative, or a rocker with the occassional lapse in taste? I can't be put as a punk, indiekid, goth, metalhead, or whatever - I don't fit in anywhere. Except chikfeast and a la bod.

Music:

CHER!, Dresden Dolls, System of a Down, Guns N Roses, Girls Aloud, BSB, Hanson, The Distillers, Courtney Love, Dolly Parton, Alice Cooper, Billy Idol, Incubus, KISS, The Ramones, Blondie, T-Rex, Moldy Peaches, Pink Grease, Peaches, Hole, The Smiths, Morrissey, Smashing Pumpkins, HIM, Greenday, Pure Rubbish, the Misfits, Adam and the Ants, anything to do with Dave Grohl or Big Sexy Josh (Homme) - the official manliest men. Kate Bush, I forgot Kate Bush.

Movies:

I've just notice that I for the last 18 months I've missed Terminator 2 off here, I feel so ashamed. I've seen it about 100 times. It's, like, my best film to the power of 100. John Connor

Television:

The best tv show ever is League of Gentlemen, very very very closely followed by Spaced. These are followed by (in no particular order) Mighty Boosh, Peep Show, Garth Merenghi's Darkplace, Buffy, America's Next Top Model, Father Ted, Red Dwarf, Neighbours, Black Books, Maury Povich when it was on. SIMON PEGG! anything he's on... anything at all.

Books:

The Forbidden Game - oh dear lord why isn't my life like this, JT Leroy, Carol Ann Duffy, Emily Bronte, Sylvia Plath, "My Fault"

Heroes:

Brody, Courtney, Bettie Page, Amanda Palmer, Sarah Connor, Madonna in the 80s, Enid from Ghost World. Such hot chicks. Billy Childish ... I think I am falling in love with him.

My Blog

Siyonara

Hello babies, I am travelling far, far, far away. I am very afraid. The most travelling I have done (due to lack of money, NOT imagination) is Portugal, and the like. I have sacrificed my social life...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Sun, 10 Jun 2007 03:32:00 PST

Vote for me, and all your wildest dreams will come true

My picture is in Bizarre, and I don't know if it's just the copy I have but the ink quality on my page is poor. And the photo is too big, it seems pixelly. I'm a bit annoyed about it. Anyway, I don't ...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Mon, 11 Dec 2006 01:05:00 PST

puppyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

I swore to myself I wouldn't do it. Not for a while. And after everything that happened this summer, & shit. But I've done it again. And, yet again, he's big and dumb and stacked, and younger than me....
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Mon, 13 Nov 2006 03:47:00 PST

This life ...

BBC 2 are showing double bills of This Life, which I had never previously classed as "A program I like". However, that's probably because I was a stupid child at the time it was first shown and g...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 03:06:00 PST

I'll gallop to you, tonight tonight

I must be the most tired person in the world, no one else could possibly ever be, or have been, as tired as this.   So this weekend, I faced my fears and went back to Leeds. And I'm so ...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Mon, 30 Oct 2006 07:10:00 PST

My days as a film buff

I'm clearing out my email inbox and also sent stuff, ready for all the graduate job offers that are due to come flooding in. I found a review of The Motorcycle Diaries I had written for the film socie...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Fri, 27 Oct 2006 03:04:00 PST

My brain

... is very dehydrated. I thought I'd escaped without a hangover. I remember putting bits of hash brownie down the back of the radiator in the Star and Garter last night. I always act like a retard wh...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Sun, 01 Oct 2006 03:30:00 PST

Attention: Give me some

Siiiiiiiiiiiigh. Im wallowing in my favourite emotion, self-pity. Ive been in Manchester for about 32 hours and Im hating it. Life sucks. I dont have reason to be in Leeds anymore, at least not til my...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Sun, 27 Aug 2006 03:30:00 PST

Dole scum

I have been unemployed for 6 days. Two of these days are the weekend, so technically I have been jobless for 4 full days. I have spend an entire year looking forward to a week where I could sleep in l...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Thu, 24 Aug 2006 09:44:00 PST

Why I don't like marriage

I read a passage from (quite a trashy) book last night which clarified my own thoughts for me, and summed up exactly how I felt (without me even really knowing how I felt myself) about marriage. It wa...
Posted by Keiti Kuroi on Tue, 11 Jul 2006 10:56:00 PST