"The good life is out there somewhere. So stay on my arm you little charmer..." -Morrissey
If you want to know what my life is like, think of how it feels to be on a plane that's going down. Still in Des Moines for the time being. If you're not from Iowa, and you seem to like where you live, let me know why. I'm open to suggestion. I just seem to keep traveling. For work right now, I've been seeking vocation in chemical libation. Your innocence is lost on me. I'm a productive member of society. I left the chocolate shop, so stop calling me, ya bastards. I now serve up really expencive steaks and wines at a fancy steakhouse. I pretend to care so good. Evidently I'm charming and really brighten peoples days.
how jedi are you? :: by lawrie malen
Seven days after you view my profile, I'll crawl out of your TV and leave you with some jack-assy look on your face. Neat huh?
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Nicholas James
Birthday: The day St. Patrick, Year of our Lord Nineteen Hundred and Seventy Nine
Birthplace: A lonely hospital in a forgotten farming town
Current Location: At the hip-hop-happenin' Capitol of a looked over farming state
Eye Color: Angry
Hair Color: Black, but some will say with some grey. I hate those people
Height: Tall enough. Unless I'm out with Shawn, Yancy and Dan... Then not just shy of tall enough...
Right Handed or Left Handed: Red Right Handed
Your Heritage: German and Russian. My anger is genetic
The Shoes You Wore Today: Pumas, but I'll be wearing boots later. Can't have a day without costume changes.
Your Weakness: Kryptonite (But don't tell anyone!)
Your Fears: Are my greatest strength
Your Perfect Pizza: One that will cover the sun and make me ruler over all!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Drive
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Deny Message
Thoughts First Waking Up: Why is my dog standing on my groin?
Your Best Physical Feature: My points and barbs
Your Bedtime: When then animals let my be. Could be 3am, could be 7pm. I take what I can get
Your Most Missed Memory: Aw, sugar, I miss all those memories.
Pepsi or Coke: I like to mix both to ensure that neither corporation loses it's strangle hold over the world. Just doing my part to kill us all.
MacDonalds or Burger King: Neither of which are actually food, mind you.
Single or Group Dates: If I were single I'd go on a group date. But as it is, I'll stick with the girl I've got. Thanks.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Why does the NSA want to know what kind of tea I drink?
Chocolate or Vanilla: Sweets are a weakness of the proletariat
Cappuccino or Coffee: Hot drinks are the Devils entry to the body. Jesus ain't zappin' me.
Do you Smoke: Not like I used to...
Do you Swear: Just like I used to...
Do you Sing: Does the Pope shit in the woods?
Do you Shower Daily: Every chance I get.
Have you Been in Love: I've seen sunlight thrown over smashed human bone
Do you want to go to College: I wanted to... It just didn't want me to.
Do you want to get Married: Are you asking? I'm taken. Sorry.
Do you belive in yourself: What a dreary thing to do.
Do you get Motion Sickness: I get no-motion sickness. If I'm not always moving, I'm sick left and right. I have a lot of rubber over things.
Do you think you are Attractive: On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd say I'm about an H
Are you a Health Freak: I did punch a boy for eating a Snickers bar I didn't feel he needed. I also run a cult dedicated to the divinity of the body and how we must do everything we can to strengthen it. But I would say no. Not a health freak.
Do you get along with your Parents: I don't think anyone gets along with my parent.
Do you like Thunderstorms: I live alone. Of course I do.
Do you play an Instrument: Not since the fire.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: I'm on probation. So, no.
In the past month have you Smoked: A touch
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Nope. Poverty is my anti-drug
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Hell, I've gone through a date! YEA! (I have no idea what that means)
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Maybe. But probably not. Try again.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Not in my life have I eaten even one box total
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Sounds exotic, so no. Corn on the cob and gasoline for this American boy!
In the past month have you been on Stage: Not me. How many times to I have to tell people that I am not in a Ziggy Stardust cover band!
In the past month have you been Dumped: I hope not.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I've watched Dan go chubby dipping, and that's turned me off sight.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Only your heart
Ever been Drunk: From what I've been told, yes. But I don't believe so...
Ever been called a Tease: I'm a 27 year old man. If someone called me a tease I'd blacken their eye...
Ever been Beaten up: Every chance I get
Ever Shoplifted: I've been poor, but not that poor. Ok, probably that poor, but no.
How do you want to Die: Gloriously
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Invisible
What country would you most like to Visit: Holland. I need more reasons to hate the Dutch
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Blind. It's easier on both of us that way.
Favourite Hair Color: Um, not balding? I'm really not that picky... Ok, yes I am, but I'm not giving out any clues.
Short or Long Hair: Not too short, not too long. Beyond that, nothing living in it.
Height: Taller than Smurfett, but shorter than me. So like maybe Gilbert Godfried height. But God help you if you look like him.
Weight: Could very well be the next cultural stigma after smoking is abolished
Best Clothing Style: Minimal
Number of Drugs I have taken: Oh, lets not go putting numbers down on paper...
Number of CDs I own: 5
Number of Piercings: 2
Number of Tattoos: 5
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Regret not the past, only what you've done about it. So a lot.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
