Gunther P. Grisslefist profile picture

Gunther P. Grisslefist

About Me

I'm on to you kids on this controversial teen website! I know about your heffing goofballs and sticking each others parts in your damn gooey holes! I know what vitamin V's are damnit! You stinkbag hippie dope gobblers better stay away from my daughter! My beautiful Guntherella will not be defiled or deflowered by you and your unruly gangs!And to you incorrigible audio rebels of the LFSAF, WE WILL normalize and subdue the horrific lo-fi eruption that you have so wantonly unleashed on our nearly-subdued subjects! Our derivations are clear and our arguments concise! We will attack when you least expect it!

My Interests

Mid-Level Managing, firing people, paper, pens, other stationary supplies, numbers, scowling, engaging in epic battles with the Audio Foundation (LFSAF), writing up employees, farting in elevators, constricting my own sphincter through the power of the mind. Oh, and of course, my beautiful daughter guntherella.

I'd like to meet:

People who are employed. I hate the unemployed. I would also like to meet the man who invented velcro. Anyone who HATES the Audio Foundation. George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan.

Music:

I enjoy only the GOOD music... HIFI music! Like Emerson Lake and Palmer, or Linda Ronstandt, although I've never listened to their music. I like Phil Collins and occasionally, Kenny G. Michael Bolton is good, and I LOVE Botson and Chicago, or Kansas, or any group named after a place in the midwest. In fact, if I started a band, I would play the clarinet, and I would call it 'Cleveland'. Bette Midler and other inspirational songs of faith and freindship are also nice. The only rap artist I can bring myself to listen to is Ray Charles.

Movies:

Educational training videos and public service movies, like Reefer Madness, or Red Asphalt. Mostly anti-drug or teen driving videos. ABC afterschool specials are okay too. I did, however, enjoy mel gibson's 'passion of the christ'

Television:

Praise the Lord, TBN, any religious programming sincere enought to ask me for my money, Wally George, Bill O' Reilley... pretty much anyone who yells a lot and seems manly. Walker Texas Ranger, the money guy who yells, Seventh Heaven, you know... the good CLEAN shows. Not that villanous scumbag whore-filth you kids watch.

Books:

BOOKS ARE NOT ALLOWED ON THE PREMISES OF THE HFLPC UNLESS THEY PERTAIN TO THE ADVANCEMENT OF LOGICAL POSITIVISM.

Heroes:

W, Ronald Reagan, Hitler (before he got weird), Booker T. Washington.