L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard profile picture

L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard

I HATE YOUR BAND. TAKE OFF THOSE STUPID GOGGLES. GO BACK TO SCHOOL.

About Me


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im pretty fresh. i think so right now anyway. but a nice fat dose of self deprication should kick in by the evening. im the best student a hot sexy teacher could ever ask for. my brain was like a racecar in gridlock, or an overturned optumus prime, but now its more like a horse that ran off and started kicking people at a wedding. but the kicks merely sent them to a better, 5th demention. i think about art all day. i discovered the gator pond next to the burnside bridge. an emu almost killed me once. a train almost killed me once. a board almost killed me once. once a dog almost killed me. a gun almost killed me once. i type...really fast. not a fan of capitalization in its regular usage. i like mustard and chuntey and international EK blue. if i could trust anybody i could save the universe but NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

My Interests

art. i mean it. i like art more than you do. collecting records and then listening to them in the best headphones, thus blocking the sound wounds of the world, like, you eating near me, junky ho conversations about bad things, you eating again, and fuckers that cant hum, whistle or sing along. YOYOs, the ultimate only-child sport. physics, molicules and cells, astrophysics. i like to walk around. stayin on top of things. but my course in life it to make all things glow from the inside or from the outside. GLOW. GLOW. GLOW. so i spend lots of time in dark places. which also means i have many lamps and low lights in my sexy apartment. diving naked off my bed into my pile of clothes and popping out fully dressed (everymorning baby, right before i make you breakfast. astounding). getting stoned, eating peppermint icecream and looking at some lisa yuskavich and a little beatriz milhazes. being healthy. yoyoing, video games. yoyoing at bus stops. the divide between people who like and dont like yoyoing. harnasing the powers of magnetic fluids. walking around.

I'd like to meet:

.. width="425" height="350" ..the freshest of the fresh. dragons, monkeys and rats. non-skeezers. trustworthy creative types who are on the move in life. has to have a hovercraft w/lazers. if you can read lets fuck.

Music:

black, dark blue, all shades of green, purple, dark red with yellow twinkles. a little bit of silver, for the atlantic set. all of which are transperent AND irradecent. big black africa. aural vampire. etheopian music blows my mind. japanise psyc. what andrew gives me from his vaults. ramp. babe ruth. congos. BOSS the MC. sweet pancakes. archie shepp. TV on the Radio. pretty samples. drum buddy. raumpatrole. big soup. nina samone. love. seeds. kurtz proj. goodbye swingtime. kook and the gang. d'angelo. cherrywine. ravel. satie. arvo part. did i say sweet pancakes? piero umiliani. tito's halloween breaks. the samples i listen to all day, get tired of and dump, that your pretty ears will never hearz. JOHN COLTRANE. sun ra. ike kieko. people. plastic people of the universe. eats tapes. amon duul II. psych shit. lots and lots of music.

Movies:

yeah, i make movies. but i leave most of that to my buddies. look out for me in, beastmaster 7. i play Fried Chicken, the wingless eagle. it stars steve erwin as the master of the beasts. this led to the upcoming, Slacker Hunter episode of Croc Hunter, in which Steve Erwin tries to get me out of my apartment. its rad when he knocks over the dresser im hiding behind and calls me a stoned son of a bitch before he tazers me but nets me to no avail. i kicked him in the ballz i told him it was an accident but it wasnt, so he broke my mirror and cut himself just to show me hes crazy which totally brought the whole thing to an end. we had been drinking sake all day. thats due out sometime in september on dvd. steve E rest in peace (sky zoo) putney swope. holy mountain. microcosmos. CLC. thrashin. Eames movies. andrews movies. yoyo vids. starwars. tron. paprica, fantasia rules. takeshi murata. lots and lots of movies.

Television:

i was on tv a few times. this one time a news correspondant was talking in front of this lattice work, so i stood behind it and jumped around like an idiot. Lost. basketball if my girlfriend would just get with the comcast three way deal. adult swim. americas top model was rad, sorry. wondershowzen charlie rose. the mighty boosh. youtube counts as tv.

Books:

back in the day this kid at my highschool threw a book in english class. my english teacher, a demure lady, got so up in his face that their noses touched "never throw a book again, they have more to say than you". well this kid was a thug and he got so mad that he punched the wall so hard that all the bones in his hand exploded. you could hear this snap/crunch. one bone stuck out of the top of his hand. he pushed it back in and went into shock. i fell in love with my english teacher. i think she liked me too. unfortunately, as i was born with one giant eye ball that only saw into the past i could not read.

Heroes:

The Seal of Approval. The Golfin Dolphin. John Coltrane. mlkjr. the dadaists. Eves Klien. Tom McCall. Huey Long. Flash Gordon. Bob Ross. Jeff Koons. Charles and Ray Eames. twist. uncle gino seemed nice. buddha. alicia justice is my hero even though i dont want to be around her right now. my parents are totally my heros.

My Blog

cat scratch fever

needing a hug i grabbed my cat. my cat scratched my lips when i gave him a kiss. i need a kiss but my lips are scratched.
Posted by L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

makin it glow

i suppose i concern myself with other peoples potential. i think i can see how great people are from the second we meet. and i give them all the support i can. but you know that someone who cant d...
Posted by L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

dis-count

i just thought you should all know i have a 30% discount at Ed's House of Gems and you fuckin dont. when he is drunk, sometimes noah tells us how fresh he is, i think he should shout out, "my future ...
Posted by L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

find me a woman

im goin to the art musium today. because i havent been looked at funny by a security guard in ages. no really its for the art. i want to look at the brush strokes of the old masters. no, reall...
Posted by L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

rainy day went away.

today is so beautiful that im gonna just walk around in the sun and if you find me i will give you a hug and let you try to solve my riddles three. if answered correctly, i will give you a magic gem ...
Posted by L.L. Cool Ron Hubbard on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST