About Me

I like it when things around me are steeped in trickery or tinged with eEvil Ink....

I like when people say, "ready when you are" and "me too." I never learned how to tell time. I don't believe this nonsense that the world is round. I have not washed my hands since 1983!
(of political crimes)
I like strolling down to the market with my cane out-streching my striding gate as I inhale my red carnation festooned to my silky lapel.
The local fruit stand I once pilfered from as a child has new owners now and they're always happy to see me. The sun sometimes winks at my shiny shoes and the bees divide and leave me be.
My fists never appear before man, woman nor beast- only upwards to the continuing dawn of paradise lost. No single man to blame but all men disguising themselves under mankind.
Beware foe! tis true the idle fists! If taunted, they will unfurl to rope and fast swirls of entanglement 23 skidoo! For you see, in the pursuit of my well being, if you have crossed eEvilyn Diddly Scott, you may find yourself neatly cocooned to a railroad track!!
Other than that, I like kittys, lollys and balloons on a stick.

eEvil Ink Design

started in 2003 on the rusty shores of Silver Lake, California.
We sell Break-Up Cards, Hook-Up Cards and unHoliday cards such as "Drunk Santa" and t-shirts...
We noticed that there weren't very many smart-ass t-shirts in the world so we decided to be the first to make them. Of course that statement is true in opposite land, the UnPresdent of the United States (they're united there) is the smartest f*cking guy...and he wears them!
Don't take these words before you's word for it, check us out:

Our Break-Up Cards:

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Our Hook-Up Cards:

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Our UnHoliday cards:

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow
BUY TODAY @: www.eevil.org
Myspace Contact Tables , hosting by Imgdump.net

www.eevil.org

We will not stop at just cards & t-shirts. We are design based and are constantly scheming. If you would like us to scheme something for you, let us know...
You may also see our stuff in action at these fine locations:

Store chains we're bought and sold in...

VIRGIN MEGASTORES - USA
NEWBURY COMICS - East Coast, USA
URBAN OUTFITTERS (everywhere during the holiday seasons)

Boutiques of the west...

PULL MY DAISY - Silver Lake, CA.
ARCLIGHT CINEMA GIFTSHOP - Hollywood, CA.
BOOK SOUP - Hollywood, CA.
BOOK SOUP - Costa Mesa, CA.
INTUITION - Culver City, CA.
PULP - Los Angles, CA.
aahs! - W. H'wood - Santa Monica - Sherman Oaks, CA.
LV PAPER DOLL - Las Vegas, NV.

Boutiques of the middle...

ENJOY - Chicago, IL.
BROADWAY PAPER STORE - Milwaukee, WI.
EVENTS - Houston, TX.
STATE OF THE ART - Birmingham, AL.

Boutiques of the east...

CARD 'O' MAT - New York City, NY.
ARCADIA - New York City, NY.
KNOTTY WOODPECKER - Hudson, NY.
MOXIE - Asbury Park, NJ.
IDLE TIME BOOKS - Washington DC
BRUSHSTROKES - Atlanta, GA.

The friendly boutiques of Canada...

DEAR, HOME - Vancouver, BC
MOULE - Winnepeg, Manitoba
KIDDING AWOUND - Toronto, Ontario
-and many more locations to come.
One last thing, if you're thinking we should be in a store near you, please bug that store to call us! or leave a message with us and we'll do the buggin. (why dirty your own paws with eEvil bidding?)

My Interests

In general we adore-- Break-Up Cards, Capes, Goats, Villains, Hook-Up Cards, Voodoo, Secret locations, Undermining my arch enemies, Comfort, Drivin truck with monkey, Trailer parks, Bank jobs, A good caper, Diamond thevery, Making up my own words, Collecting tiny art chairs, The stupid, Boots, Tall Hats, The Honeycomb Hide-out...first you hate them, then you respct them, then you want to join immediately, Bukowski, Hobo Clowns, Bigfoot, Steve Austin, Douglas Adams, Bears, Hunter S. Thompson, The Letter Q, Freedom of Speech, Moustaches, Beards, Chewbacca, Baretta's Theme, Keep your eye on the sparrow, Jonesy's Jukebox, Anthem Magazine, Flukiest Blog, Rum, Bass, Paints, Taxidermy, Ceremic Kitsch, Lizard Men, Chocka, Beards made of of bees, Meatloaf the food, Canoodling, Misenthropes, Parrots, Balooning, Fine wine, Good champaigne, Clean sox, People falling down in malls, Cats with capes.

I'd like to meet:

A person of the non-stinking variety who is a tad off center- not obviously so- but just enough to make us wonder,
"what the f*ck is up with the axe?"

Music:

Mahler, Wagner, Beethoven, The Velvet Underground, T. Rex, The Clash, Mingus, Gram Parsons, Flying Burrito Brothers, Tina Schlieske, Bob Dylan, John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Sex Pistols, Serge Gainsbourg, Marc Bolan, Roxy Music, Lou reed, Mick Ronson, David Bowie, dEUS, Arcade Fire, Arctic Monkeys, Louis XIV, Super Furry Animals, OK GO, Desmond Dekker, Clarence Carter, Bo Diddley, Elvis Costello, Kieth Richards, Ike & Tina Turner, Junior Wells, Willie Mabon (if anyone has a player on this cat, please let me know. I'm looking for "I don't know". Let me know), Modern Lovers, Patrik Tanner, Elvis Presley, devo, Wilco, X, Adam and the Ants, Flaming Lips, Cannonball Adderley, The New York Dolls, Niel Young, Dana Gillespie (if you have a copy of her version of Bowie's "Andy Warhol" -let me know!), Harry Nielson, The Kinks, Curtis Mayfield, The Stooges, Iggy Pop, Alice Cooper, The Who, The What, Richard Hell, The Chips, Murder Tooth, Crotch Lightning---all played on a phonographic hifi. (78 rpm)

Movies:

Journey to the Moon, Intolerance, Nasfuratu, Great Train Robbery, Villain Still Pursued Her, The Fiendish Plot of Dr. Fu Manchu, The Hunger, Smokey and the Bandit, Hooper, Bullet, The Party, Merry Christmas Mr Lawrence, Used Cars, Last Temptation of Christ, Weird Science, Shindlers List, Return to Witch Mountain, The Isle, The Happiness of the Katakuris, The Blues Brothers, The Life of Brian, don't look back, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Convoy, Star Trek II (The Wrath of Khan), Comedians of Comedy, The Meaning of Life, The Holy Grail, The Jerk, Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid, Born Into This, Eat the Document, New York Doll, Raising Arizona, Dr Strange Love, Superman, Neighbors, Drugstore Cowboy, Short Cuts

Television:

Dr. Shrinker, Lidsville, Electrowoman and Dynogirl, Lost Saucer, Herman's Head, Little Britain,
The Colbert Report.

Books:

Bathroom stall poetry, Sin on Wheels, Airplane emergency cards, Mail from ed mcMahon, Albums left in the 99 cent bin, Trotsky, Art of Rope Knots, maps (in general), Train Guides, Tolstoy, Gogol, Tropic of Cancer, Black Spring, Quiet Days of Cliche, Summer in Algiers, Myth of Sisyphus, The Fall, The Dubliners, The Shout, Rhinoceros, I Fatty, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Time Quake, Yes I can, How to Speak Hip, Jail Bird, Slack Jaw, Hitch Hikers Guide, Fan Man, Hollywood, North of South, Breakfast of Champions, Ham on Rye, Factotum, Ask the Dust, Post Office, Women, Dirty Havana Trilogy, Restaurant at the End of the Universe, V. , So long and thanks for all the fish, Mostly Harmless, Welcome to the Monkeyhouse, Cat's Cradle, Rum Diaries, on the road, Dharma Bums, Desolation Angels, Lonesome Traveler, Long dark teatime of the soul, Life the universe and everything, The Crying of Lot 49, The Sun Also Rises, Richard Brautigan----and the menu at Norm's (not a book, the menu)(or movie...?)

Heroes:

Ivan P. Pewter III, Uri Poppleczeck, Dr. Shrinker

My Blog

eEvil Ink Appears in New York City

I am writing this note upon a small schooner by the name of "Beachy Keen II." Do not ask what happened to The Beachy Keen the first. That is to say, you can ask, but you wish you hadn't because the an...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Fri, 11 May 2007 01:04:00 PST

KURT VONNEGUT...HE WAS A GREAT BASHER! (never a swooper)

KURT VONNEGUT, loved laughing at people falling down, so did his sister.He was a self-proclaimed "basher" writer, not a "swooper" -meaning someone who swoops down adn corercts words adn snytxa.Mr. Von...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Thu, 12 Apr 2007 06:17:00 PST

The Hollywood Hills Are Made of Kitty Litter

As you may sort of see, or perhaps you've been there and you know, all those hills above Hollywoodland are made of grade "A" kitty litter.If you have a cat (or cats) and you live in Hollywood, do your...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Thu, 26 Oct 2006 01:25:00 PST

It's a Suck Fest

What gives with vacuum inventors?? what's with all of the attitude all-of-the-sudden?? This Dyson guy comes out, literally, and so smugly states that he has the best vacuum in all the world!"No Bag!" ...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Wed, 25 Oct 2006 12:56:00 PST

BOOK TITLES FOR TEACHERS

FIVE BOOK TITLES FOR TEACHERS1. "Carrying the Remainder."2. "Hey, Your Kid's Fat!"3. "Having class is a new pun in my life and when I use it I cry a little tear....it's so very sad."4. "No, no...t...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Tue, 24 Oct 2006 12:13:00 PST

JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR, eEvil Ink is NOT a tattoo parlor!!!

Some things should be known, by you, before you message us....1) Aforementioned title: A working title (if not moniker)2) The two "eE" 's in eEvil stand for the two saps that started this thing. It do...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Wed, 03 May 2006 12:12:00 PST

Alphabet Soup is for Pukers.

If you're caring for someone who has the stomach flu and they're throwing up everywhere- and all the time- do them and yourself a favor and feed them alphabet soup.You have to ask that they not chew t...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Fri, 14 Apr 2006 11:52:00 PST

The Strokes / Franz Ferdinand War!

I think that Franz Ferdinand won the war for the megaphonic, dirty, riffy sound. The Strokes have come back with a keen new song, which is not bad, but after I hear it I find myself singing "Oh Mandy"...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Sat, 08 Apr 2006 05:07:00 PST

Don't ask jeeves.com nothin about nothin, he don't work there no more.

Poor f*cker...He was canned! I just foundout...Please send Scotch and old Playboys to:Jeeves R. Mantrout34 W. Slivermoore Rd.Yonkers, NY 10708or:The Woodtick Barc/o "Chewey"14258 Brooder St.Yonkers, N...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Fri, 07 Apr 2006 09:09:00 PST

HOBO CONTRIBUTIONS

Hmm, well let's see...If it weren't for the hobo, um, did they invent stew? I know they invented the handkerchief tied to a stick thing. Did they invent clowns? The early clown does invoke "hobo" does...
Posted by eEvil Ink Design on Thu, 06 Apr 2006 01:18:00 PST