Unicorn Cockblock profile picture

Unicorn Cockblock

COCKS MUST BE BLOCKED

About Me

What's up all. I'm the Unicorn Cock Block. I was born in a far away land but now I live in Akron. My main objective in life is to block cock for all mankind. If you think you are going to get a piece of ass, think again, I'm always lurking in the shadows. In my spare time I like to devise strategies on blocking cock and whale on my totally sweet guitar.

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

I would really like to meet a sweet earth woman. Yeah I get a bad rap for what I do, but it's my nature. Who knows, maybe once I start to get laid I won't have to worry about other penises penetrating vaginas, I can just do my own thing. As long as woman remember that they belong in the kitchen making me sandwhiches, everything will be OK. You see woman have to know their place. When men are talking they need to keep quiet....I dunno start mixing up some cake batter or something. So in closing I just want an earth woman with double d chest who bakes cakes in dresses.

Music:

I love all kinds of music. I like to model my guitar playing after the great Jimi Hendrix. I think my favorate band of all time is LFO, they were real pioneers lyrically. I mean check out these lyrics "You are the best girl that I ever did see, Larry Bird the great jersey 33". When I read those I cry, it's so deep.

Movies:

My favorate movies are mostly comedies. I really like Teen Wolf, I can relate to him. The only thing that sucks that he was accepted into society, I'm an outcast who can't play basketball, all I can do is whale on my guitar.

Books:

I mainly like Shakespeare as you can see in my picture. I also like other books like cat in the hat and green eggs and ham.

Heroes:

Heroes?? I have a fucking Unicorn head on a humans body, who the hell could inspire me!?!? My life is miserable.

My Blog

NO cocks to be blocked

There have been no cocks to be blocked in quite some time. Nick and Adam are having woman over tonight however, this might be my chance to get em!
Posted by Unicorn Cockblock on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST