Jan 1980 Born Morgan Cody James in Des Moines, IA
July 1981 Duplicated some shapes by drawing them on the garage floor. My mom did not know I wasn't supposed to be able to do that.
Nov 1982 Taylor, my sister, was born in a la biblioteca.
Jun 1984 Duplicated my wall paper on the walls in the dining room in crayon. You are welcome Mom and Dad
Aug 1985 Went to kindergarden and learned to read good
Aug 1986 Went to 1st grade and kids made fun of me for my asthma. Stupid Seattle.
Feb 1988 Moved to the Rock. Isaac was hopin I was a girl
Mar 1988 Had an asthma attack at Pat's house and gave his mom a heart attack
Mar 1988 Kids still made fun of my asthma
Aug 1992 Had every class with David Burch and I thought he was fat
Sep 1992 Realized Dave was fat
Nov 1992 Tried out for the basketball team and made new friends
Jan 1993 got my 1st and last kiss ever
May 1996 Got my drivers license and a sweet 92 Taurus
May 1996 Took High School too seriously. I should have been scoring more with the ladies, but prepuberty Morgs sucked
Jan 1997 Called Dave Fat Dave
Jul 1997 Got pissed at Sam everyday for lettin his life get out of control
Apr 1998 Got arrested
Apr 1999 Got Arrested
Oct 1999 Got Arrested
Sep 2000 Went to SCAD
Sep 2000 I made friends and bought alcohol all the time. I was the oldest ever in the dorms
Feb 2000 Fell in love with Chart House
Dec 2003 Graduated after 5 1/2 years of college
Jan 2004 Moved home to have foot surgery and take care of my pops who had his hip taken out
Feb 2004 Lived at home with no job and I drank every night. Jon showed me how to be a real adult
Apr 2004 Some chick in WHITE PANTS tried to molest me in front of her family
Sep 2004 Moved to Cali
Dec 2004 Went to Cancun and my mom now thinks I am an angry drunk
Jan 2005 Newt bet Dave 50 that he couldn't throw a football 50 yards and Booch threw it 60 to V on the run. Best toss of his life. No lie. Sam and I laughed
Jan 2005 Turned 25 and I realized I was old
Feb 2005 Worked too much
Jul 2005 Realized I was in love with WHITE PANTS after she denied me
Aug 2005 Chaunce was born
Sep 2005 Everybody's retarded in the head
Oct 2005 I realized that somewhere in the ocean, there is a dolphin with a lazer strapped to his head waiting to kill me.
Nov 2005 Sin City invited me over for a friendly game of craps in which I lost $300. HOLLA!
Dec 2005 Decided to start my own civilization by creating small people out of legos and mammoth blood. Things are going really well and the people of Morgonia have named me Mayor and God.
Jan 2006 I invested in Stryker. Now that I am 26, I figured I would need a new hip in like 2 years. That stock purchase was like finding liquid gold hard metal in a fountain.
Feb 2006 Some asshole popped his collar in front of me so I killed him.
Mar 2006 Realized wars were created so Americans could learn geography.
Apr 2006 I had to join Pilates cus my posture blows hard dick.
May 2006 Dunked a basketball with two hands again. After fainting, I realized that the Grasshopper was back and that their was a new fear in the hearts of men.
Jun 2006 I wake up and do 1,000 penalty shots every morning training for the World Cup 2010. I am gonna make that team. Try and stop me you bastard.
Jul 2007 I decided to do this transmission from the future and I only have one thing to say, "I hope you people who live in Rhode Island know how to swim." And yes, in 2007, tacos are against the law. Sorry.
Aug 2006 Chicago owned me. Basically, Chicago was this big beautiful bastard child with a whip that decided to take it's frustration out on my liver. I quit drinking forever or until September.
Sep 2006 That was september?
Dec 2006 Cancun.... La biblioteca.
Jan 2007 I am in SF.... I think I would rather be in Oakland.
Apr 2007 Decided I needed a change of scenery. Gettin ready to move across the country to NYC. Later LA.
Jun 2007 Moving to NYC is an expensive poop show!
July 2007 Accepting resumes for potential girlfriends.
Sep 2007 Dominating is getting boring.
