Text Messages 13 |
"Hey little one... you're setting off my Amber Alert!""Seasonal Depression" was written in icing on my cookie cake."Taos, New Mexico (1981): Pulled long Indian hair out of mouth after bite of Pueblo f... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Sun, 12 Mar 2006 05:00:00 PST |
Text Messages 12 |
"I can only hold back your fan club for so long. The torch is nearly extinguished, and I need more autographed photos."
"Watching grackle spin a french fry in his beak like a baton."
"I popped a... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Sat, 28 Jan 2006 10:46:00 PST |
Text Messages 11 |
"Jared from Subway just made a personal appearance on my chest."
"Mothers Id Like to Fuck Against Drunk Driving"
"Theres a chair for your vagina at Arbuckle Wilderness."
"That hazing incide... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 31 Oct 2005 09:30:00 PST |
Text Messages 10 |
"Update: I've changed my name to 'Mr. D.' and I'm offering affordable 'bodywork' under the blue tarp in the back of my pickup. I'm parked behind CoolBeans."
"I can't believe BTK invented the whoppe... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Tue, 23 Aug 2005 04:31:00 PST |
Text Messages 09 |
"The employee of the month just bitch slapped me into next week. Thing is, next week's a new month, so I'm not moving my car."
"A new myspace profile just ran down my leg..."
"Imagine all the co... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |
Audrey Dean Leighton R.I.P |
The man in the photo that I use as my profile image is named Audrey Dean Leighton*. Unfortunately, a friend recently informed me that Leighton died of undisclosed causes within the last month. He live... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |
Text Messages 08 |
Curl Up and Dye name of beauty parlor in Hemphill, Texas
A fringed jacket wearing citizen just told me: If it happens again, Im coming at him with a windmill effect.
Remember the first ti... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |
Text Messages 07 |
"When I die, let it be beside my upturned walker on the floor of a casino."
"I just saw an apartment complex sign offering a 'free designer purse' to new tenants."
"Pewter. you love it."
"Exc... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |
Text Messages 06 |
"Dear Martin: Gene Wilder wants his hair back. Yours, Martin."
"Turn up Al Qaeda! My tittie meat's on fire... and this burka's coming off!"
"Audible sighs are a sign of mental illness."
"Carr... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |
Text Messages 05 |
"I just got a job as a receptionist at Adaptations by Adrian and my face hurts from smiling too hard."
"I swear to God my niece just slammed a buttock-load of TrimSpa and now she has a tattoo of he... Posted by Twirling Drifter on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST |