stillantibus ocellis profile picture

stillantibus ocellis

I am here for Friends

About Me

what should I say? you random folk and friends read this and want to know me. some of you may just know me better than myself at this juncture so these words may not carry any weight to you.
I would like to think my heart could be a stone, but it can not. I would like the storms of summer to swallow me and bolt me deep into this earth, hide me from everything, even myself. I only admire this city while she lays silent in the still of night. I do not care much for small talk, faces that grow ugly with greed, or those who carry the knives for my back. I care for love's breath, the mother who birthed the mountains of wyoming, the coastline of seattle. I love the way my hands feel wrapped around _____ waist, a girl who will wear a skirt and t-shirt, poetry, bukowski, watching storms and the calm I find in their turbulence. I do not much care for clubs, bad music, pretension, bad ideas, hardcore kids of this new generation, one-uppers, coke heads, glitter, commercial restaurants or the way certain people laugh. i don't mind being the outsider or the guy at the party who only knows one person. I love to love. I am a kind. I am an asshole. I am a child. I am a man. I am the embers waiting to become flame. I was once a stone on a slippery slope, but now I just wait at the bottom to be pushed back up. And I must tell you, my friends, there are fires inside us that we should not let warm us.
you will probably never know me, for I will never really know myself.

My Interests

music, movies, coffee, poetry, college football, bad tv shows, girls girls girls, sleeping, road trips.

I'd like to meet:

conversationists & revolutionists
the one that will get away.the one who will shake me like a bad dream. the one who will lift this head.
yahoo = sxelinus
aim = presumemedead

Music:

iron & wine, mazzy star, why?, doseone, jedi mind tricks, deftones, converge, botch, coalesce, willard grant conspiracy, chris isaak, aesop rock, binary star, themselves, sole, brother ali, das efx, pedro the lion, unearth, anniversary, fairweather, billie holiday, frank sinatra, skip james, el-p, wu tang, rocky votolato, shai hulud,hayden, the six parts seven, isis, deadman soundtrack, eyedea and abilities, murs, mr lif, minus the bear, sharks keep moving, june of 44, shellac, tanner, van morrison, ccr, elliot smith, radiohead, roy, skycamefalling, saves the day, far, old DEP, Old 18V, old 97s, tiger lou, kid koala, modest mouse, edith piaf, grade, neko case, jesse sykes, kathleen edwards, bombardment society, andrew bird, cave in, black heart procession, all american rejects, buried alive, oh no, passage, buddy holly, gym class heroes, clue to kalo, subtle, atmosphere, jel, nico, toadies, beastie boys, mars volta, passage, dead prez, nada surf, set fire to flames, explosions in the sky, god speed, teamsleep, sage francis, talib kweli, ODB, Honorary Title, babbletron, postal service, eels, donovan, cat power, liz phair, pavement, tony bennet, cLOUDDEAD, Max Fischer, searching for chin, cap'n jazz, her space holiday, killers, microphones, handshakemurders, mirah, snow patrol, will oldham, yeah yeah yeahs, j. cash, people under the stairs, j-live, rjd2, gangstarr, 27, ALX, casket lottery, listener, meshuggah, modest mouse, reggie and the full effect, prefuse-73, mastadon, knife in the water, James, eels, brian straw, pearl jam, get up kids, ayentee,hum, incubus,7a7p, himsa, pj harvey, denali, old drowningman, curl up and die, movielife, all else failed, this day forward, lanemeyer, burnt by the sun, a life once lost, you and i, neil young, turmoil, countervail, tusks of blood,usurp synapse, terror, no motiv, black love crew, lulu mushi, masha qrella, illogic, krs, k-os, deep puddle dynamics, lali puna, daughters, POS, 13 & God, Band Of Horses, Criteria, Josh Rouse, Mal Madrigal,Mum and as much blues as i can handle these days.

Movies:

thin red line, 16 candles, charade, some like it hot, sex and lucia, super troopers, wet hot american summer, beautiful girls, big lebowski, bull durham, christmas vacation, great expectations, average joe, psycho beach party, tremmors, lost highway and mulholland drive, 10 things i hate about you, music from another room, rules of attraction, amelie , 8½, Swingers, y tu mama tambien, lost in translation, groundhogs day, anything bill murray, clue, high fidelity, donnie darko, about a boy, everyone says i love you, happiness, your friends and neighbors, spanglish, elf, when harry met sally, o'brother where art thou?, all the real girls, most 80's comedies, back to the future, office space, best in show, waiting for guffman, a mighty wind, about a boy, drop dead gorgeous, motorcycle diaries, l'av aventura, la dolce vita

Television:

nip/tuck, espn, food network, family guy, futurama, king of the hill, committed, OC, life as we know it.

Books:

anything and everything bukowski. that man tells it like it is. marquez, the tao of pooh. what else is there?

My Blog

Ban News

the blossoms fall, dead to the heat of dayin nights embrace, a patience love speeds awaya last embrace of spring, a victim to the summer's reign....
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Wed, 06 Jun 2007 11:04:00 PST

.

i wanted words that would calmand instead was only reminded that love is a flock of vulturesthat pick at the sores.i wanted bukowskito give me insightor tell me something to calmmy nerves, but nothing...
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Tue, 29 May 2007 10:37:00 PST

being open only promotes theft.

last looks.i always remember them.and i always know.all those facesseen for the last time.the eyes are always the same.and what can i do?...
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Tue, 29 May 2007 09:26:00 PST

The Feast

let the hyenas feast.let the blood thirsty laughterecho through the air,through the hollow bones.let the animosity tear the flesh.let pretty pretty smilesdevour the manand scatter him about.his final ...
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Mon, 28 May 2007 02:12:00 PST

Wait out the day.

Oh man what a day. Court and I sold merch for Drake Bell of Nickelodeon Fame at the new shopping center in Papio. Never in all my life have I seen so many crazy little girls and equally crazy mall mom...
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Mon, 28 May 2007 07:44:00 PST

come along with me know cause there is something i've been dyin to tell you.

the heart can not appolgize to the brain.
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Sat, 26 May 2007 11:53:00 PST

rza says it best

"Keeping the attitude of a child is very, very important in life. I try to keep that in me every day. The child you were is what makes you the man you are, and you always have to reflect back. Even if...
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Sat, 26 May 2007 11:40:00 PST

someone is gonna die...

...for speaking false truths.sidenote: made a 3 disc foreign hip hop mix that way just be the best thing ever.
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Thu, 03 May 2007 08:04:00 PST

word vomit

so you thought you could make it. you thought you could fake the smile, slip out the door and run wild down the street like a savage being chased by bees.for fuck sake, we're all being chased by bees....
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Wed, 02 May 2007 10:29:00 PST

Leona Naess

That song of hers called Ballerina has been haunting me for days.and its so fuckin girly.
Posted by stillantibus ocellis on Mon, 30 Apr 2007 07:01:00 PST