VonFuct profile picture

VonFuct

People say I'm funny. I say people are dumb.

About Me

What do you want to know? I'm 35 going on 25. I'm a magazine art director by day and I baby sit dumb drunks at (K)night. I dig old shit; cars, electric fans, murdercycles, magazines. There's just something about finding a 50+ year old kitchen mixer, plugging it in and IT STILL WORKS. I don't like a lot of shit; people who drive those ridiculously large trucks that NEVER leave the ROAD, puking Jager and Baja Fresh, disposable plastic shit, those boxy Scion car/microvan/things, emailing someone and they DON'T reply, people that wear Von Dutch hats and don't have a clue who he was. If you know anything about the man or the fucked up company raping his name you wouldn't buy shit from them. Oh, and just FYI... i am NOT boyfriend material, nor do i even think people should be in relationships. Stay single, be selfish, learn about YOURSELF and for pete's sake - DON'T have kids or get married. I say whats on my mind and sometimes that backfires on me but oh well. I never thought i was that smart... until i realized how stupid everyone else was. ............................................................ ............................................................ ........................... ............................................................ ............................................................ ........................... if any of you drunkards & deadbeats want to get ahold of me call my cel if you have the number and if you don't, email me at [email protected] or Yahoo IM me at VonFuct or AIM IM at VNFCT. And if you see me out and about buy my ass a drink!Cheers, E ............................................................ ............................................................ ...........................--------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------

My Interests

Kustoms and hot rods, choppers and bobbers, tattoos and piercings, magazines, mid-century design, old fans, young women, smoking, good herb, Jagermeister and RockStar, Diet Pepsi, salt water aquariums, reef tanks, black velvet paintings...

I'd like to meet:

............................................................ ............................................................ ........................... Someone I connect with and don't hate after 2.7 seconds of knowing them. A sassy, little inked-up firecracker would be nice too. Someone with passion for life and something to say. A creative and open minded soul. Someone as politically INcorrect as I am. Someone with intelligence and the drive to do something with it. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .NEW RULES - READ THIS BEFORE ADDING ME AS A FRIEND I'm tired of all the lame ass fakes and flakes around here so there's gonna be some changing. I don't have the time to waste to try and communicate with people that don't respond or reply, interact, become involved or generally act as a "friend". So if you're just out friend collecting, picture hunting, a band, a club promoter, live 2000 miles away, just wanna leach off my friends list, whatever — don't bother. Save us both the time and move along. If you wanna add me, then send me a quick note and give me a hint as why we would like to get to know each-other. ............................................................ ............................................................ ........................... Oh, and any girls that can bounce like this...
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Free video hosting, video codes at www... ............................................................ ............................................................ ...........................

Music:

An eclectic mix, Led Zep, Johnny Cash, Sabbath, Black Flag, Social D, P.I.L., Guns n Roses, Pink Flyod, Nirvana, Justin Warfield, Eminem, Snoop, Lou Rawls, Bob Marley, Beastie Boys, BEP, DK, The Ramones, The Donnas, Frank Sinatra, etc...

Movies:

True Romance, Braveheart, Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, Gone in 60 Seconds, 8 Mile, Pulp Fiction, Natural Born Killers, Ghost Dog, Basquiat, American Graffiti, Star Wars, Shane's World (before she got married)

Television:

Monster Garage, 24, American Chopper, Biker Build-Offs, pretty much anything on Discovery or The History or Learning Channels, The Simpsons (All time best show EVER!), Family Guy, Harvey Birdman, and the rest of Adult Swim.

Books:

The Rodder's Journal, HOP UP, The Horse Backstreet Choppers, Rolls & Pleats, Custom Rodder, Rod & Custom, Car Kulture DeLuxe, Barris Kustom Techniques of the '50s Vol. 1-4, 1949-51 Ford Shop Manual

Heroes:

I wouldn't say heroes, but people I admire, look up to, respect greatly for one reason or another, enjoy their work and talent: my father, my mother, Ed "Big Daddy" Roth (R.I.P.), George Barris, Sam Barris (R.I.P.), Larry Watson, Bill Hines, Gene Winfield, Kenneth Howard (R.I.P.), Robert Williams, Von Franco, Mark Ryden, Coop, Pizz, R. Crumb, Dave Burkes, Shag, RK Sloan, Anthony Ausgang, Hugh Hefner...

My Blog

Ford Econoline Van 1970's Bachelor Pad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLjY-A81Fng ...
Posted by VonFuct on Tue, 20 May 2008 12:46:00 PST

Blowjob Etiquette... and a rebuttal by yours truly.

Okay, so this was posted (minus my comments in bold) today and before i could even get through half of it, i had to repost and rebut.1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.no, you're not...
Posted by VonFuct on Fri, 18 Aug 2006 04:09:00 PST

What's going on?

What's going onin the world today?It's out to be straightand in to be gay.Dr. Phil on the TVspewing out lame shit,Angelina with kidsand dating Brad Pitt?Illegals receive aidwhile citizens perish,Ipods...
Posted by VonFuct on Fri, 09 Jun 2006 03:07:00 PST

JagerMotherFuckingMeister...

Aw Jager... the cause and solution to most of lifes problems.Jagermeister Herbal LiqueurA herbal-flavored bitter german liqueur, made from a blend of over 50 herbs, fruits and spices.Alcohol (ABV): 35...
Posted by VonFuct on Mon, 05 Jun 2006 12:26:00 PST

* * * VonFuct's Pics Of The Week!! * * *

Once again it's time for VonFuct's Pics Of The Week!so just scroll down and take a little fucking peek.There's a sick, sick car so low and so downright clean,and some artwork that is just oh so very k...
Posted by VonFuct on Wed, 05 Apr 2006 02:39:00 PST

Stay Gold and Rest In Peace...

Rest In Peace JohhnyEarly yesterday morning, we lost a true talent and a wonderful individual. Johhny Vasko, AKA Johnny Chop passed away due to heart problems. From FUCK YOU to TRUE BLUE, his work has...
Posted by VonFuct on Wed, 29 Mar 2006 11:22:00 PST

Talk Like a Pirate Day Poem...

'tis Talk like a Pirate Day but ye should already know so stow all ye "proper grammar" and let's get on with the show. avast ye land lubbers and all ye scurvy wenches it's time for all buc...
Posted by VonFuct on Mon, 19 Sep 2005 10:39:00 PST

Girls, read this...

1. Don't tell us when you think other girls are hot. we have to, it keeps you on your toes and reminds you that there are other fish in the sea and that you should stay on your game and not get "com...
Posted by VonFuct on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

titty poems n shit...

6.7.05 So Happy Titty Tuesday to all you sexy bitches, with itty bitty boobies or ones that rip the stitches. there's something about cleavage it's just so fucking tasty. so when you lean right over,...
Posted by VonFuct on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Viva 2005  The Poem&

What a fucking weekend, Viva Las Vegas 2005! Yes I made it back, and I think Im still alive. Got there Thursday nite at fucking one in the a.m. Started drinking the Jager and popped some pil...
Posted by VonFuct on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST