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Bo

I'm counting down the minutes till I can be with you again...

About Me



I have drug and alcohol problems and am plagued by frequent, violent bed wetting. Common responses to my personality include hitting me with a purse and or trying to blind me with powdered glass.

I have my been recognized numerous times for my work with mentally diseased dolphins and sexually confused teens as a part of the aquatic Christian grass roots interest force "Swim Straight."

I have never been kissed. Not even once. Lady luck, dew, and my own mother included. It is my conspiratorial fancy that this may in fact encourage my nocturnal egesting issue. No professional of any kind has encouraged this thinking.

My Interests

Media digestion, Nintendo, Self-pity, Involuntary Abstinence, Camping, live events (well, not theater), my own inevitable Diabetes, skin cancer, mental breakdown, and heart attack, secular reasoning (and Pastafarianism), pro-wrestling (sorry), Recreational Drinking, Professional Drinking, Drinking for Speed, Art Theory, Internet Culture, Indie Culture, Retro Gaming, Self-satisfaction through social pruning

...but seriously, beating my wife.

I'd like to meet:



A (preferably female) possessor of a vergina' with whom I can share my insecurities and drag to the bottom of the ocean. Must be able to feign acceptance, simulate fitness, and create the illusion of intellectual competency. Text messaging skills a must. Familiarity with the movie Munchie a plus.

Music:

I'm retarded for music. Want a taste, if you're on IE check My Yahoo Custom Station

--------The Golden--------
They Might Be Giants, Modest Mouse, The Pixies, Built to Spill, MF Doom

--------The Chosen--------
Neutral Milk Hotel, Soul Coughing, Radiohead, Pavement, Gorillaz, Ben Folds (Five), Grandaddy, The Decemberists, Bjork, The Flaming Lips, The Eels, Beck, Smog, The Magnetic Fields, Cornelius, Pinback, Les Savy Fav, Del tha Funkee Homosapien, Imogen Heap, Clem Snide and Eef Barzelay, The Thermals, The Microphones, AC Newman, Iron & Wine, The Pharcyde

--------The Classics--------
Peter Gabriel, Frank Zappa, David Bowie, Bob Dylan, The Talking Heads, John Lennon, Neil Young, Johnny Cash, Wu-Tang, The Dead Kennedys, Harry Nilsson, Biggie Smalls, XTC

--------I'm Watching--------
Beirut, Art Brut, Tim Fite, Wolf Parade, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Easy Star All-Stars, Dogs Die in Hot Cars, Jon Brion, John Vanderslice, Giant Drag, Optganally Yours, Regina Spektor, Mellowdrone, Sun Kil Moon, Mr. Lif, The Perceptionists, Gnarls Barkley, Seu Jorge, Mission of Burma, Nouvelle Vague

Movies:

I'm retarded for movies too.

--------The Golden--------
The Big Lebowski, Pulp Fiction, The Shining, Blue Velvet, Fight Club, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Jesus Christ Superstar

--------The Chosen--------
Evil Dead II, City of God, Blade Runner, Pi, Spirited Away, Brazil, Beetlejuice, Jacob's Ladder, After Hours, Ghostbusters, Audition, Adaptation, The Return of the Living Dead, Akira, Delicatessen

--------The Classics--------
The Godfather I and II, Dr. Strangelove, A Clockwork Orange, Taxi Driver, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, The Exorcist, Goodfellas, Being There, The Hustler, An American Werewolf in London

--------I'm Watching--------
Punch Drunk Love, Sideways, Shaun of the Dead, King Kong, 28 Days Later, The Incredibles, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Television:

The Critic, Clone High, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Kids in the Hall, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Adult Swim (minus Home Movies, 12 Oz. Mouse, and the Brak Show - sue me!), Lifetime Original Movies, Monique's Ms. F.A.T. Beauty Pagent, Animal X, and nature specials featuring Badgers, Tasmanian Devils, and other aggressive, smaller predators

Books:

A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole, The End of Faith by Sam Harris, Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut, and The Autobiography of Joseph Stalin, A Novel by Richard Lourie

Heroes:

Batman, Jesus, L. Ron Hubbard, Frank Black, Shigeru Miyamoto, Brian Posehn, and Keiji Inafune, in that order...

My Blog

Ode to the Panda

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/thailand_panda_sexPanda, when I cry, I cry for you, and not for I.Panda, when I cry, I cry for two, you and I.I wonder where I can get "Panda Porn." Sounds... steamy....
Posted by Bo on Tue, 16 Jan 2007 01:40:00 PST

WW10 _-_ Give Up (The Funk)

And then one day you wake up, and it's over. And you think, was any of it real, or does my memory like to tell me stories? The aliens took me aboard their craft, and forgot I was there for four months...
Posted by Bo on Wed, 20 Dec 2006 12:20:00 PST

I'm in teh photoshop makin yer pictures

A quick regurge' of the something yer something funny cat picture meme (see numerous examples here and here). Been done plenty, sure, but I enjoyed making it. In case you're missing the joke, this mod...
Posted by Bo on Sat, 16 Dec 2006 05:35:00 PST

The BoAwards (Yeah, I know, I expect better of me too)

2006 BoAwardsSorry, I know this is completely inane, and the fat man's slice of the pie chart is near to meaningless for most of you (AKA all of you), but damnit, Evelyn did it, and made it seem cool....
Posted by Bo on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 11:53:00 PST

WW 9 _-_ Place in the Sun

Freeform intro, feel free to skip ahead. I'm feeling lose, I'm feeling emo. I'm feeling soul dissipating in to steam. I'm feeling cheated thanksgiving turkey. My skins all bad, my mind is cooked, my b...
Posted by Bo on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 08:47:00 PST

WW 8 _-_ Shunned

A sad day in emo blogging be this one. My "life" (note the huge quotes) is interfering with my blog. Very soon I'll be attending a rock and roll concert with four web team co-workers. It's happening a...
Posted by Bo on Thu, 07 Dec 2006 05:36:00 PST

WW 7 _-_ Whoa... Is Me?

So this is Wednesday, and what have I got? No girlfriend, so a blog to write.Loyal readers, know this:  prospects exist. Is the end near? Is that the hint of a smile on big bad Bo's puss? Oh cour...
Posted by Bo on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 10:37:00 PST

You Know Why I like Happy Feet?

Do you know what I like about Happy Feet? Scroll down to find out. You do have a choice. Red Bill, Blue Pill. Keep scrolling, or avert your eyes and save yourself.  I like ...
Posted by Bo on Thu, 30 Nov 2006 11:29:00 PST

WW6 _-_ The Net

In the spirit of the holiday, Bo breaks down all the things he is thankful for... that, or he bitches, nonsensically, about Happy Feet, like some poor man's Hunter S., too small to not look past the s...
Posted by Bo on Thu, 23 Nov 2006 06:21:00 PST

WWtWM 1 _-_ Darwinian End Toys

INTRODUCTION. If you are already aware of my 'song and dance' please skip ahead to the main content of this blog.If you've never met me personally, never made the connection when considering my not...
Posted by Bo on Fri, 17 Nov 2006 09:17:00 PST